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 Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 9:46 am
Hypocrisy that's always needing to be said, even if neither party has a lock on my vote.
To be a Republican you need to believe:
1. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton
2. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's Daddy made war on him , a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.
3. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Viet Nam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.
4. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq .
5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational drug corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
6. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches, while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.
7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.
8. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our longtime allies, then demand their cooperation and money.
9. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing health care to all Americans is socialism. HMO's and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.
10. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.
11. A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.
12. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet .
13. The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.
14. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.
15. Supporting "Executive Privilege" for every Republican ever born, who will be born or who might be born (in perpetuity.)
16. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960's is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80's is irrelevant.
17. Support for hunters who shoot their friends and blame them for wearing orange vests similar to those worn by the quail.
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 12:22 pm
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 12:27 pm
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 5:53 pm
damn polotics. I guess I'd start paying attention to this kind of stuff since I turn 18 tomorrow....
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Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 5:30 pm
You forgot one thing:
If you're not conservative Christian, you can never be a tr00 Republican. Fact.
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Posted: Fri Nov 02, 2007 7:12 pm
and this is why i hate america and all politicians. the democrats aren't much better, in fact no party is better. all politicians are hypocrites. but...i guess i gotta agree with gakihime election year is coming up. and i'm going to be 18 too. shoot, can't complain if i don't vote for the best idiot.
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Posted: Sat Nov 03, 2007 1:54 pm
Not EVERY political party is hypocritical... confused
Third party leaders are generally not hypocrites and in most cases are extreme in their devout beliefs, near incorruptible in certain cases.
It's just that no one votes for a Third Party candidate, really.
Not that it matters, since Democrats and Republicans own Congress.
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Posted: Fri Nov 09, 2007 10:54 am
Our entire system of government is corrupt and flawed in many, many ways. All of the major choices that our politicians make are based largely on who gave the most money to help out their campaign, and the ones who aren't given sacks full of dirty money never win because they have little to no funding compared the the money-grubbing douchebags that take bribes.
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Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 2:52 pm
 I'm not sure which political party I want to be in yet but I saw this online and thought it was pretty funny and thought you people might get a good little laugh out of this too
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Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 11:11 am
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Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 3:28 pm
gakihime I'm not sure which political party I want to be in yet but I saw this online and thought it was pretty funny and thought you people might get a good little laugh out of this too
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Reply
