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 Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2007 9:12 pm
He couldn't stand it anymore. Crying his little eyes out in his dorm, by himself...it was wrong. It was wrong that he was crying, wrong that he was by himself, wrong that he felt self-piteous when he knew there was someone else out there, someone else who meant the world to him that needed him more than ever. Perhaps, a little selfishly, RuiZhi needed Weiyuan just as much.
It was a mixture of these strange thoughts that found him in front of his old dorm room. The one he used to share with Weiyuan. The one he left so...so Rylenn and Weiyuan...
The tears were starting to spring back into his eyes, but he fought them down. He didn't know what state Weiyaun would be in, and that thought frightened him a little. Could he handle Wei crying? Worse than that, could he handle Wei acting like he normally did, as though nothing were bothering him...? Lifting his chin, the youth gave three sharp knocks on the door, followed by a quiet but audible, "Weiyuan...?"
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Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2007 9:27 pm
The brunette had just finished towel-drying his hair, no daring enough to look at himself in the mirror. He didn't need to see that he looked like s**t, even with the 'refreshing' shower.
The moved quickly hearing the knocks. He blinked haering Rui. He had planned on confronting him first but...well he supposed that spending a day...or more...in that room would take up more time than he expected.
The male quickly slid on pants before opening the door, the towel draped over his eyes to hide the puffyness. He did his best to compose himself, it wasn't the end of the world. It wasn't. "Rui...I was just going to go find you."
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Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2007 10:38 pm
RuiZhi took a deep breath as he heard his brother padding towards the door. The young man who opened the door and spoke to the younger boy hardly seemed like his brother. If it wasn't the puffiness, it was the way Weiyuan's shoulders seemed to sloop, as though defeated; it was in his voice, and the very words he said. His eyes started to sting, and the words tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop them. ""
That was as far as the youth got before the tears spilled from his dark brown eyes, hot and fresh. "" he sobbed, wiping his eyes with his fist and covering his face with his sleeve. He hadn't wanted his brother to see him like this, so weak when he knew Weiyuan needed the support...but his heart was broken. For the loss of his friend, and for the loss of his brother's beloved. It wasn't that Rylenn had died or anything, but RuiZhi wasn't sure he ever really thanked Rylenn for being his friend, for doing all he had. And now...he would never be able to.
The feelings of grief, loss and guilt were too much for the freshly fourteen year old boy. Inwardly, he blamed it on hormones, but his heart knew better.
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Posted: Thu Oct 18, 2007 7:33 pm
The elder sighed, pulling his brother close, closing the door before directing the other to his bed. Wei gathered Rui into his arms, rocking them back and forth whispering comfortig Chinese proverbs into the air.
He was younger, not as experienced with hurt as he was. He was gifted with that innocence but still he knew that eventually a time like this would come. ""
He gently brushed away the other's hand, before cupping his brother's head, touching their foreheads together. ""
Wei could hear his words and he knew they were right, but his heart refused to believe them. Young at heart and old in mind. He just didn't know the balance. Idly he realized that this was the same way he held Rylenn, he shifted his hands to avoid the oncoming pain. This time was for his brother.
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Posted: Tue Oct 23, 2007 8:23 am
The younger hiccuped and sniffled as he listened to Weiyuan, comforted by the familiar warmth and smell of his older brother. At the last part of his words, however, RuiZhi gave a weak snort. "" he inquired kindly, turning brown eyes upwards. Tucked against his brother as he was, the boy couldn't see his face. ""
RuiZhi knew Weiyuan may not let out his emotions in front of himself. He knew that the older would possibly want to deal with things in his own good time, and not further 'upset' his little brother. The youth was no stranger to loss, having neither of his parents and no siblings outside of the two that had adopted him; why was this loss any different? Rylenn wasn't dead, and like Weiyuan said, he wasn't entirely out of their lives. Still...
"<...I never got to tell him how important he was. I never got to say goodbye.>"
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Posted: Tue Oct 23, 2007 12:16 pm
A small smile crept onto his lips, tears wearing in the corners of his eyes. Rui knew him well. Gently, he pulled back, petting his brother's hair. "" His mind also made sure he stayed in check, that it always put other's before himself.
Wei started to pet his didi once more, smoothing down unruly strands. ""
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 9:02 am
RuiZhi poked Weiyuan's chest in a gentle manner, trying to compose himself and seeming to be doing well in it. "" he remarked only partially in jest, "" It was partially true; to the young boy, it was Weiyuan's large heart that had allowed him into the older boy's life at all. It was the love of a father that had taught them all just how strong Wei's heart really was.
He let the silence stretch comfortably for a moment before asking, "<...why? Why'd he leave?>" His voice cracked a little, and he stopped talking to fight back the fresh wave of tears that were prickling his eyes.
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Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 12:36 pm
Weiyuan sighed, his body decided it was too tired to stay sitting flopped down the bed, rather ungracefully, and rub his face into the blanket. He opened his eyes, eyes tracing the seam pattern to keep occupied. ""
A little part of him blamed himself. Maybe he distracted Rylenn away from his studies too much? Were the complaints of being too loud in their passion the reason? He prayed to his ancestors that he wasn't the cause. But if he was...if he was...Gods. He just...he didn't trust the world that Rylenn was now in. He didn't.
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Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 10:46 am
"" RuiZhi offered thoughtfully, wiping his wet cheeks with the back of his hand. Tears were still trickling, but the sobbing had stopped for the moment. The youth remembered the scars...remembered Rylenn's confession of what had happened to him as a boy. It hurt him to think that his dear friend had to return to that place that he had struggled so hard to be free of...
""
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Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 11:11 am
Reality didn't seem to care about 'worlds'. They were each other's worlds, so why did they have to be so far apart? Wei graoned into his bed, trying to hold back the need to cry.
He wasn't one to cry in front of anyone else. He...he didn't believe in crying. He knew that it wouldn't do much. Wei practically cried himseslf to sleep since Rylenn was expelled. He just....just...
Argh! The male slammed his fist onto the bed. He'd rather deal with anger than sadness. He could always take his anger out on something...but he couldn't do that with sadness.
""
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Posted: Mon Nov 05, 2007 10:39 am
RuiZhi flinched at the punch, suddenly feeling like he might have been trespassing on Weiyuan's own brand of healing. "" he asked meekly. He didn't like the sound of his own weakness in his voice, or the hurt that took a hold on his heart at seeing Weiyuan so withdrawn from him. While RuiZhi couldn't pretend to know how close or not his brother and Rylenn had been, it almost felt as though the sibling closeness had dwindled somewhat.
It was his own fault...moving out...thinking he was old enough and ready...
The younger boy lowered his eyes, scooting back a little. "" He lifted his bloodshot brown eyes to Weiyuan, smiling apologetically. There was nothing condescending or angry about his statement, merely simple facts being stated.
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Posted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 6:24 pm
Sanity slowed his anger for just a moment. Pondering his didi's words. It was obvious that this wasn't something he wasn't used to seeing. He was quite sure that he hadn't really cried in front of Rui, and knowing from experience it was awkward when someone started crying and you didn't know what to do about it.
Wei lifted his head a little bit, wetness around his eyes and an aura of vulnerability floating around him. his hand reached out for his brother's pant leg, grasping at it, despite his wishes, desperately. ""
He needed comfort. He needed arms that he could trust to wrap around him and tell him that things were going to be alright. Normally this would be a parent's job, but he had no parents here to console him. As adult-like as he is, age-wise he was still young.
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Posted: Fri Nov 09, 2007 8:23 am
The boy's mouth slackened with surprise, brown eyes wide with confusion as Weiyuan reach out to him. RuiZhi quickly composed himself, crawling onto the bed and wrapping his arms around his older brother tightly, curled against his back. "" he murmured into the older boy's hair, "" The young boy tried to think positively, despite his shimmering eyes, ""
Now he sounded downright silly...like their sister, even! He made a little hiccuping laugh, one tear escaping into the blankets, holding Weiyuan tightly. ""
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 2:48 pm
Weiyuan held onto the arms surrounding him tightly, biting his lips trying not to make those sad little whimpers. ""
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Posted: Sun Nov 11, 2007 4:15 pm
"" came the quiet reply, "" And that was all the younger boy said. RuiZhi had come looking for comfort, but instead found himself being the one to do the comforting; it was fine with him because in its own way, this was comforting to him.
And so the brothers stayed as they were for a time, hoping to get through this dark, unpleasant bend in the tunnel.
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