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These are three things I've written-ages(14-15), but where lost when my computer crashed a few months earlier. I don't write often, but when I do, I end up with long chains that no-one seems to comprehend-for these are my inner-thoughts-to each their own.

In this first one, please don't mind the capital words; they are in that format to show significance. Also, I was not depressed, this just came to mind bit by bit on a rainy day...

Written by: Larele`

Lone Wolf

Endlessly searching…
My pure and greatest desire is to find my home, apart from all others it shall remain, I am, endlessly searching…
Torn away from them, like paper I burn, burn with anger and despise. They who have pushed me away, let their guilt be felt upon them, as I feel mine! Undeserving of this cruel treatment, this cruel banishment to The Lands With No Names. It is here that my fate has been decided for me, a life of sorrow and regret.

You do not know me, for if You did, you were, and are mistaken. I take the form of sorrow and yet, somehow I am the Angel of Peace. When Dawn and Shadow meet, that is when I shall see the Light. Shy, You may call me, but invisible I am not. I am simply without feeling, oblivious to the pain I have long-since suffered from the hands of evil beings, from their thoughts and their minds. Torment and grief, they brought to me, but no longer can I sense, feel this threat. You do not know me, for if You did, You may find it seemingly impossible to recollect.

I was once visible to all eyes, the one who always cries. I was once there, as they are now, I once had a soul that could freely express, one that could freely care. In order to understand me, I must first gain Your trust, and You mine. Only then shall You, and You alone gain the key to my universe. The one place I’ve been living eternally and for all eternity I shall remain.

Love, is it really there, does it truly exist? If it does, I can’t feel it for I have been neglected, left in the solemn darkness of my mind. So this is where I currently reside, in The Lands With No Names, I am safe here, safe from those who had pushed me, pushed me to the far ends of the earth. I constantly wonder, is there anyone out there, anyone to hear my silent cry? This is where my life ends and where it is new to begin. A single soul has no meaning unless it is discovered by another, those who possess faith and the ability to purify another’s heat are those who may see me. If You can see me, please tell me I’m there, for I cannot feel even the presence of my own being. I have grown weary and numb, my search continues, but to no avail.

Can You hear me? Please someone, tell me that I’m there, for I cannot feel my fallen heart, I sometimes wonder if it’s even within. A crescent moon descends upon the dreary night sky, descends upon the place I once knew well. Clouds block my visibility; I can no longer rely on my sight. My heart has been crushed, so deeply, so swiftly. Does it still beat? My soul is the only thing that now guides me through that desolate, solemn world. I am a-stray lost and forgotten, my soul beckons to me, beckons to be free! Shall I allow it? I have no desire to release the only thing that still sheds Light to me. Are You trying to hide from me, why do
You do so? Why is it that I am feared by You, am I only misunderstood? Clear as the ocean, pure as the clouds that dance across the horizon, You must feel what is left to be false, You must never know, You must, and will gaze upon the dim Light.

I shall now show You, take my hand and step into my world, let me guide You to the place where eternity never ends. Do you trust in me? Have faith and I shall show You the way. My home, it is as some would say destroyed, yes and no, it has only been severed from my being. Forever sealed away against the Others, only for I will it grant entrance. I, and I alone. My howl, my cry of despair, it lingers on within the hearts of those who have betrayed me. My blood runs as fast as the rain, it races within me now, telling me to follow, to where, I do not know. Yet it persists, drives me ever so closer to the memories that lie within. A shadow has devoured me, I wonder…am I still alive?

Trust, is it possible to re learn, to re gain? If it is, please tell me, I need to know that someone cares, I need to know if Their ways have ceased. In my darkest deepest, thoughts, those of which I can re collect my soul. Foreign world, do not shield from me, for I am the Harmless one I cannot bring sorrow to You like you have done me. Lost and afraid, I am not, stolen, yes. I was long ago stolen, stolen from my beating heart. I am not Dark nor am I Light, I wish only to co- exist within the two worlds, but this, I feel has no possibility. The remnants of what, who, I once was have drifted, drifted across me, they are and always will be just out of reach. I grasp what little I have left, the part of myself that has not abandoned me. I grip it, grip it with the thought of losing all I once knew. Time has ceased to exist, has disappeared all together, along with my past.

You still do not know me, for I have not shown to You the secret door in my world, a door which You shall never see, unless I gain You admittance. Lull me to sleep, softly lower me down, for I am the Forgotten one, the one without name. My kin despise me for who I am, the Lone Wolf, who are You? The wilderness has overtaken me, I am dazed by all I discover, someone, hear my cry! Set me free! Do You fear me, if so, You may take Your leave, for I have nothing more to confess to You. A dozen tornadoes, one thousand hurricanes, I am slowly eroding; as each day passes a little more of me is washed away. I do not take life for granted, there is much for meaning to existence to that, but not mine. The blood within my veins runs rapid as the silk current of the river, the river that washed away my long forgotten tears. Claws shred at my soul, I cannot let myself be devoured! I will not give in! Fight, it is what I must do in order to survive, for I am, merely only a cast away. Darkness closes in on me, I know it is near, save me from who I’ve become! A nightmare is summoned, a fright realized, I am wishing it gone, but to no prevail. In the soft glistening snow I slumber, I am within it, safe from Them.

My Guardian has arrived to rescue me, and so now, I must depart. As I take my leave I keep You entranced, for I can hear Your thoughts before You speak them. Do You so wish to follow me, if so, I apologize but I cannot permit You entry through the secret door. It is indeed the one and only place to which my heart can be restored, the one place my soul can rest from all troubles past. All is behind me now, the Light of which I speak has finally discovered a way to my deepest depths, the deepest depths of my soul. Triumph is not a reward, but instead the ultimate sacrifice. In order to gain the key to my once undiscovered, untouched universe, You must first prove Your worthiness. Steal away from Yourself your triumph! Let all glory and pride cease! Find my key, and unlock my wall, my universe. I advise You now to turn away, go back from which You came. I do not need Your presence any longer, leave at once!

Guilt, is that what I now feel? How can I feel it if all my senses are destroyed, how then, please tell me. I have done many selfish acts, many of which I can never forget, many of which I’ll always regret. Rain falls as swift as my tears, I thought I could no longer cry, feel emotion, is this false as well? Light, I see Light in Your heart! Please take me with You, take me to the realm of which You reside! My sorrows have lifted, my pain gone, come Light and show me the path of which I seek, my home. Like a solitary mountain I exist in this world, my world, as the eagle soars so then do I. My place in society once un clear, is newfound! Almost there, I can feel my presence, my heart that is sounding a steady rhythm, I can see once again. Clouds that have once blocked my view have dissipated.

In my new found feelings I can’t help but wonder, have they changed their devious ways? If I try to return to Them, the pack I once knew, will I be accepted? Or am I to forever remain as dust blowing in the wind, a mere cast away? My soul is driving me forward, I know I belong somewhere, I am not sure if it is here, this place of desolate dreams. The dreams that I once held close to my heart have escaped, though I feel they are still nearby. To The Lands With No Names I was long ago banished, ever since then trust was not an option. To trust another meant to turn your back on yourself; to render your being defenseless. I have found that I can trust You, however I am unable to be entirely sure, it pains me so to see You go. Howling a desperate cry, that is how You are to leave me, do not abandon Your power of Light, it is a necessity to Your being. Faith in Yourself, You must keep, harness the power within. Dance underneath the full moon as I do, let Yourself become free, become one with me! Do not hide Your sorrows, for they are what hold You down, this I have learned.

Let Your mind be captivated, we are approaching the Link, the link that hides within my universe, the one that keeps me hidden. I am the Lone Wolf, I am the Solitude! Listen, hear Your heart, hear mine, they are the same. We are no different from one another! Paint with me the colors of the sky, the blues, whites and purples, call out to me that all is forgotten, the past, present and future. I have returned from the brink of extinction. I have come to join the pack, to be like the Others. Stare at me, why do You do so? Are You still frightened of me? Tell me this isn’t so! I wish to return to reality, to their realm, show me the path to the Light. Lucid is the Light, Dark is my universe, I must now destroy it, I must come back to life! Flashes of Light dance across the yonder , waiting to capture, to entrance me. Not yet, my deed is not done, I am unable to unlock the Link that lies deep within my soul, therefore, I shall send You away. Goodbye, I know now why You were sent to me, to guide me was Your purpose, of which Your attempts have failed, I’m sorry.

Endlessly searching… Will I find my way? Without Your Light, I am devoured by the Shadows, they have taken my back to my universe, I fear to reappear in Your realm, I am amongst mine, and there I shall remain. No being has ever entered here, for it is strictly forbidden, shallow is my heart. Once more, I cry into the long night, the Shadows, the Light, to which do I belong? I belong to neither, I am Twilight. I am able to co exist within the two realms of life, this I now see. You have set me free! The two realms have connected, a bridge formed there, in midst of my realm and Theirs. I am cautious to crossing it, fear envelopes me, I trust Them not. I give in, I let go of the bridge, and forever fall. I am still falling, descending, to where I do not know, but still falling. There is no one here save myself, I am alone once more… am I deceased?

Taken away was I, before I could learn to love, to trust? They who have betrayed me, They who have destroyed me I used to be like Them, I was only different in Their eyes. I do not belong here, this is not my home! I shall forever be in doubt, for now I see, there can be no home for me. I am the Solitary, I am the Silence, I am the Lone Wolf…endlessly searching…

This one is special to me. Written from the view of a young child, it tells the short story of a cold winter's day, and a family..all is peace. lo This was originally assigned by one of my English teachers (8th I think); write a short story to make the reader feel that they are there. Let me know what you think? ^^

Written by: Larele`

Look Into My Eyes, Tell Me What You See

Days past, days to come. I’ve seen them.
Silver bells and tinsel on the tree, gaze up in wonder and you shall see.
Warm greetings to all, tis the season to cherish with harmony. Tis the time past the falling
of the leaves.
Come one, come all the time has begun for a great gathering. For some to feel the light of
the season and others to release the scars of their past. Silent with desolation, why is this to be?

Follow me…Into a hidden place of warmth and caring…follow me…draw upon my memories with me, what few I retain. Look into my eyes, tell me what you see. The love and caress from one another is of far more greater value than gold and silver, these mere possessions of the earth cannot amount to that which my heart holds.

Swift and silent…the snow has fallen. White with peace, the reminder of hopes that lie dear to our heart and of lost remembrance. During a night as this, takes place my recollection. The pure moon floods the empty streets with a luminescence of a thousand distant stars. All has fallen silent in the calm of the night, not a soul is stirring. Far off in the distance a joyous tune is perceived as the carolers sing in close harmony. On my street though, all is sound as the crisp, fallen snow. As “Silent Night” and “Silver Bells” fill the lonely night air, I sat by my window wishing to be there.

The hearth no longer bear, stockings are now hung there. Designs of many variations are among them, I see bright reds and forest greens, plump holly berries, and soft, fuzzy fabric covered in plaid. I’ve yet to place mine amongst them, it’s somewhere just not here.

Follow me…I have somewhere I’d like to take you, will you please come? Enter the depths of sweet smells and spice apple cider, the cozy little kitchen is where we currently reside. Here, in this wonderful tiled room of cooking to perfection there can be found many a tasty treat. There’s hot cocoa on that little black table over there…want some? Careful it’s quite hot, see the steam? I have the shiny red cup, you, the shiny green. I scorched my delicate, pink taste buds, they’re mad at me now and so they stab me with throbbing pain. I thought a glass full of cool, refreshing liquid would help, but to no avail. I learned my lesson the hard way, oh well.


Can you see that picture, the one with the silver frame? That’s me when I was little, that’s my shadow… Those years have silently eroded away, as new memories are created, new days to come. See that dress I’m wearing, it’s soft and full of waves, I wore it when I was only two years in age. I still have that same, sparkly dress it’s in my room at the moment…do you desire to see it? Feel my dress, it is the softest thing I’ve known besides the closeness of my family to my heart.

Come…look, look out the window it is snowing again! I need to ask mom and dad if I may enjoy this fresh blanket of snow, if they say yes will you come too? Boots, jacket, what else…I know I’m forgetting something.. oh, my scarf! Will you get it for me? It’s the little blue one, the one with the tassels on the end. Mom is saying something, she says I forgot my mittens. They’re underneath the pile of clothing on my clean, white floor. I’ll be back, I need to get them. While you’re waiting grab a cookie, they’re fresh! Mom just made them. Can you hand me that one, to the left, the one that’s shaped like a cute little Christmas tree? You can have the angel with the yellow frosting, I decorated it for you.

Look…look up at our tree, it isn’t dressed yet, I’m supposed to help with the pretty lights and ornaments, I also get to place the angel at the very tip top, I can’t reach though, so dad said he’ll give me a ride to the top. Mom says I can go out now. Would you like to make a frosty together? Not the kind you drink, here I’ll show you. Watch out for that patch of slippery ice, I’ve already had my feet taken right out from under me twice.

Mom and dad made a frosty too, theirs’ looked pretty silly! Snow ball fight!! Duck! Mom got dad, but he’s about to return the favor… Run mommy!! You almost got hit, better watch out, my dad’s good with snow fights! We can hide behind the car, it is white like the snowflakes, so maybe he won’t find us. The moon is like a giant beam, it won’t be hard for him to find me behind the car, but you can go to my next hiding place. It’s over there behind that snow drift.

He found me, I got hit on my half- frozen cheek. It burns from the cold, maybe I should go inside… No, this is too much fun!! My frosty needs a nose, I want to get a carrot from the box that keeps our food, it’s cold too, but not as cold as out here. I don’t think we have coal, it’s that shiny, black stuff right? Mom and dad have an idea, they say to use two small, round pebbles. You do one, and I’ll do the other. I found some sticks for his thin arms Frosty’s finished!! Oh no, his head fell off, daddy says he’ll fix it for me. I’ve been shivering for a while. It’s time to retreat to the inside of our house, it’s nice and warm and the fireplace will be on.

Sit...sit by the fire, don’t get too close it is extremely hot and you wouldn’t want to get burned by those bright red and orange flames. See that picture? The one with that frosty-green framing? That’s a very special picture, my parent’s wedding picture. I love that silky white dress that my mom is wearing, I wonder if when she felt it, it was as soft as my blue baby dress. There are a lot of classical Christmas programs on at the moment, my favorite of them all is “Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer”, what’s your favorite?

We can watch it until the stroke of ten; otherwise Santa Claus won’t drop by for a visit! I don’t want that to happen. I am trying to draw Santa, he has a big, round belly and…a happy smile and…he’s all dressed in red and white! I want to draw Rudolph with him and one of his little, helpful elves but I ran out of room. I’m finished with my picture, mom just put it on the box, I go over to look at it and see my favorite magnet. Do you want to see which magnet’s my favorite? It’s the one shaped as a gecko, aren’t they cute? My father brought it back from Hawaii for my mother. I’ve always wanted to hold it. I dropped it upon the tiled floor, it didn’t break, but I cried anyway. My tears were swept away by my parents who came to comfort me…Look into my eyes, and tell me what you see.

I'm glad that what I've written has finally been placed into a suitable category.
crying Thank you, Sakyh..I find your words of response meaningful in the highest amount..

I swear I even think of reading a line aand my eyes become mesmorized by your writing. It is truely a work of art.