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I would if I could but I cant.

Usually about once a week I just start writing for some random amount of time, then I just stop, and can't think the idea further for another week. Each time I have a revelation, and always remember the basic idea of it. But later on when I try to read it, it doesen't make any sence, but I still remember what I was goign at some how.

When it happens I usually write some vauge, long series of paragraphs, with poor sentence structure, a small vocabulary, barberic hand writing.

It usually looks something like this.

Nececity comes from war, and so forth when it doesent than it is kind of just life, that's how it works. What is the difference between war-nececity and life, I don't really know I must find out.

It usually is more lengthy than that and makes less sence, but I kind of forced that one out and it didn't really work.

HEhehe found one. It's about a month old. I've copied the exact grammar I put into it, so it seems a bit strange.

Self is memory, memory is past percepts, and experience In how towards it. Mental is part of memory, pressure is build up of stress, and mential memory to eveuntally create a desire, or can be resistent. most of teh actions com from accepting pressure as our own self, but is actually giving into the desires, and requirements of others who are also basin gthemselves on pressure. Movement? It is a religeon, or belief, but what is the origine? Movement is (I think) when pressure leades to so many desires, that it becomes a process. It could also be called a way of life. If all movements, and ways of life/lifestyles are resisted, then on emakes ones own decisions of desire, or not. to do this pressure must mentally be dismissed as trivial. After this are there really any goals? Perhaps. Perhaps not. It depends on the person/self/memory. Goals come from movement. Good and bad, desire, non desire, self perfection, acceptence of peers. Without these movements there are no goals. Only nececities which are food, water, shelter, clothign, clenlyness, and rest. these needs can only be quenched temporarily, and only through work. To only work, and quench needs, by rejecting all movements, is in itsself a movement. Therefore one can not act without following atleast one movement. The question is what movement, or movements, oen should chose.

MOVEMENTS:
Good, Evil, right, rong, religeon, self improvement, self glorifying, self indulgence, or hethenism, slef deprivation, self moderation, self abstanence, self controll, self love, self hate, hate, love, war, revenge, peace, posessions/desires, charity, respect, dicipline, work, non work, Hermitism, knowledge, non knowledge, truth, wisdom, foolishness, lies, imagination, creativity, servitude, love(twards the oppiside gender), lust, envy, addiction, pressure, non pressure, self entertainment, cheating, stealing, sin, crime, racism, justice, fairness, happyness, bliss, experience, strength, weakness, controll, pain, insanity, humor

I cant understand the handwriting in the rest.

I couldn't translate it for you, but I still remember that it means, that we give into peer pressure, and steryotypes, like gender, adn race, so much, that we think they are our real deisres.

I do have a journal in my room, when I have these writing urges at night, but I don't walk around with it, because I am affraid of winding up taking medecine for some illness I don't allready have.

I am 13.

ALso I would like to say that there is no real need for me to keep this text I write.

I allways remember the concept of what I was writing, and never understand the writing itsself when I read it.

I have a great memory of facts, and concepts, but not of names. That is why I often have problembs talking at normal speed.

Wow. I sometimes get a good writers block. But I get good inspiration from movies I watch. I write a lot of fantasy, vampire and a bit of fanfics. Not many. It's just hard to get inspired sometimes. But when you get it, the flow of the story continues on. I have a few of my works in my journal.