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 Posted: Wed Aug 08, 2007 3:57 pm
Argh, dont you just hate it when one of your freinds asks you a really awkward question about relationships. I got one of them earlier today.
A freind of mine from another city came down to see people from our home city. She's a good freind and I enjoy spending time with her when she comes to visit or when I go up to visit her (usually go and visit her with my cousin).
Now shes told a mutual friend of ours that she likes me as more then a freind and just now talking to her online she asked me if I felt anything towards her because she thought that I did. I hate this kinda question from people that you like as a freind but just that, I mean I dont want to hurt her but then again I don't want to lie to her and end up in a relationship that I dont want to be in (its happened to me in the past).
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *hits head against wall* Why Why Why......
Anyways, I told her that I only saw her as a freind even though i know it would hurt her which really really sucks (I generally dont like hurting anyone in anyway).
Anyone else had problems like this in the past and how'd you guys solve them if you did.
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Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 1:28 pm
I had to think about this for a while, and I really can't remember being put in this situation. Somehow I've been lucky -- the friends I wanted to be friends with didn't try to get romantic on me.
I've had friends go through it though. One of my female friends developed a crush on her male best friend (who was also a good friend of mine), and he had to rebuff her -- he was coming out of the closet. It wasn't easy for either of them.
Anyway, there isn't an easy answer for the situation. What you did is the best you can do -- it would be much worse for her (and you) if you strung her along, even if you were doing it to not hurt her. Yeah, it hurts, but she starts the healing process now, rather than later. She sounds like a resilient type, though -- she had the guts to ask you how you felt.
One thing that *might* help is to make sure you treat her the same as before, to show her that you value her friendship and that you're not going to treat her differently just because she tried to start a relationship. It's very easy to try to be hands-off to make sure she understands that you're not interested, but it might seem to her that you're not being her friend anymore. The flipside is that if you treat her the same as before, she might think she has a chance. You have to judge that risk for yourself though, since you know her best.
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Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2007 3:45 pm
Once, my best friend, whom I only see as a brother, asked me a question and I didn't hear what he said, so I said agreed. Then later I found out the he asked me out. xd
Breaking up with him was so hard because we're such good friends, but I couldn't lead him on.
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Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 10:58 am
I couldn't relate, i've never had a girlfriend and probably never will. I don't find myself attractive and have pretty much given up. Nevertheless, I do a lot of regrettable things that make me want to run into a wall, I would probably break the wall with much ease though. I took a titanium golf club to the head once when I was eight.
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Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 8:40 am
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