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miquelet

PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2007 1:40 pm


I recently recieved a flash of inspiration and turned it into a slightly off-kilter poem. I had to write it down while I could, so the grammer's bad, too. But I won't fix it, I want to leave it as it is.

are silver tresses and ebon dresses beauty sublime?
or is it tears of darkest fears that lend a poignant grace to a dishevelled face?

left behind by a wayward scion, bereft of hope and always crying

encased in a prison made of my own heart, don't know the exit or e'en where to start
trapped within feelings i can't understand,
always walking, always searching, for a sign i can't comprehend

crimson eyes, blood red from weeping,
always sleeping, never alive, not at all,
never moving, always losing, falling deeper yet still

i may find a world of sorrows, in far off tomorrows
but the bitter tears of today are worse by far,
much more fierce than those afar.

heart rending pains are proof im alive,
but at such a cost, how can i survive?
these tears that grant me exquisite pain,
are always leaving, and wont to fade

once again i'm left all alone
not even myself for company
i'm not here anymore, i'm nowhere at all.
i can't stand this silver sorrow,
this flash of pain that frenzies my senses
rendering all inert as my final rest
so i hang onto hope fiercely,
but it will leave like all the rest

blood is the last warmth i own,
how divine it looks when it is shown
partake of a cup of fear with me,
abide in this abject misery
and cry with me awhile


(If you are wondering, the inspiration came from Suigin Tou from Rozen Maiden.)
PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2007 2:53 pm


eek
.... And you just wrote this on a whim? .....O.O You know sometimes I hate you Rye!! rofl heart heart heart heart

It's absolutly awesome!! heart I really do love it! 3nodding heart

Naito_Mitsukai
Crew


miquelet

PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2007 7:33 pm


Well what can I say? I had just finished watching a few AMVs for Suigin Tou and a couple videos for Higurashi no Naku Koro ni, and it just inspired me. Better in paper than in flesh, eh?
PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2007 10:20 pm


That's....incredible.... eek

The language....and how it flows....wow.... eek

Honest Sarcasm


Fantasy_Magick777

PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2007 11:56 pm


first off i agree with naito. i hate you. stare i cant write poems to save my bleedin life and that was just amazing Rye. you know i'm always a fan, but i mean... thats just damn good and you know it too. heart 3nodding
PostPosted: Wed Jul 11, 2007 8:58 pm


I think you should skip poetry and write music lyrics instead q=P

Flying Mojo
Crew


miquelet

PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2007 9:05 am


aren't they the same thing, in some instances? A poem set to music is song lyrics, and song lyrics performed a capella are poetry.

And in case anyone was curious, here's the links to the two videos on Youtube that gave me the inspiration for that piece.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fqDTgrgn3O0

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u159wYAlCT0
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2007 9:36 am


Yeah, really really good poem! Enter it in a contest or something! Also, I like the Rozen Maiden video best.

WobinA


Naito_Mitsukai
Crew

PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2007 2:58 pm


I've seen the one by 'Kict' before, and I still don't get it.

Haven't seen the other one before. I think I agree with Wobby though

But I still like the music from the one by 'Kict' better! 3nodding
PostPosted: Thu Jul 12, 2007 8:31 pm


Well the one from kict is from the anime Higurashi no Naku Koro ni. Basically a series of alternate tales about mental instability and pain, how things can spiral out of control and overall, an excellent and chilling anime. The song just goes really good with it. (Enough that it made me cry first time I saw it.)
And on the topic of songs, I'm not so partial of the song used for the Rozen Maiden/Suigintou one. It works pretty good, but I think a better song could have been found.
Which reminds me of an AMV I'd pay to see, various Kabuto and Orochimaru scenes from Naruto, set to Simon and Garfunkel's 'The Sound of Silence'. It just seems like a perfect match.

miquelet


kathofthecanals

Distinct Explorer

PostPosted: Thu Aug 02, 2007 11:42 pm


AH! You have no option for "awesome!" scream

I love it!!!! heart
PostPosted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 11:15 am


Okay, had another one. No real dedication this time, and again the grammar is horrible. Regardless, here it is.

As I sit next to the window, I cast my gaze outside
snow falls like shattered crystals, like the window is not there at all.
I feel the shadows encroach upon me,
using paths I've long forgotten,
getting closer, ever closer, I feel them pressing to my back.

I turn around but they're not there
I knew they wouldn't, just as I feared
the crystals marked the path on which they jumped when I averted my eyes.
paths of blood show me the way,
the place to go where I might stay.
I don't know why, but some might say
that I'm stalking my shadow

the gentle beat of a startled heart lends a simple cadence, a place to start
the shadows flicker like fading flames, matching my moves and showing my truths
yet I cannot bear to look upon them, they show me that which I left behind
they show the things I don't want to find

But was it all within my mind?
I don't know, I can't bear to find
that I may be culpable of so many incurable sins.
I'll run away once more and let the shades pursue me
They want to find and use me, give those with no form a voice
but when they find me I'll be gone already
on a new path shaky and unsteady
I don't know the reason why I must leave before I'm there

The shattered shards of the mirror are littered on the floor,
scattered all around me, showing signs of what went before.
The mirror I looked through that was like a window
it showed me as snow, as shattered dreams
but was it as it truly seems?
or is this life a mirror's dream
to show the truth or something new
the shed it's blood for a cause true
or just be left behind

to be consumed by the shadows, to be hidden in the dark,
to find a cause worth dying for, to find a voice to take as it's own.
But the mirror is a shadow, it does not exist on it's own. If there's none to
see it or what it shows, then is it there at all?
would it matter were it to fall,
to shatter like the window of my soul
to turn black like dusky coal
but the darkness hides the sins I'm afraid of
that they be revealed i fear more than the shadows
so I'll stay a mirror a little longer
let the shadows become stronger
and sleep for a little more
and then awaken nevermore

miquelet


Naito_Mitsukai
Crew

PostPosted: Tue Aug 28, 2007 10:10 pm


I reiterate - Sometimes I hate you Rye! heart rofl

This is amazing! I love it! heart Never stop writing!! heart
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