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 Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 4:27 pm
My mother has good reason to believe that my sister is drinking. She read my sister's inbox and saw a text talking about where they would get thier next thing of booze, so my sister is grounded right now. All I have to say right now is that my sister is an idiot for doing this sort of thing! Alchohol=bad. Alcohol+minor=double bad. Minor+alcohol+being booty call for an 18 year old= triple whamy bad. YEp, you heard me, my sister is booty call for an 18 year old. She has told me about the things that she has done with this guy 'Joe' and I am disgusted to thing my sister would do something like that.
What she has done just goes to show that stereotypes are never true. There is my sister, straight A student, Church fanatic, never goes out past ten and here she is, going to lose her virginity beforeshe is even 17. Then, there is me. The punk, goth loser who hangs out with the kids most dont even look twice at(except to comment on thier outragious hair XD). Gets grounded all the time(for getting a C >.>) flunked math (I hate the integrated system crying ) and hangs out with her friends untill at least midnight. This girl would not even consider spreading her legs untill she is at least 18.
My mom is angry, my dad is angry, my grandparents are soon to be angry and for once its not pointed at me. I think my sister is being so stupid right now. She wants my mom to trust her that she is not drinking, but I dont even know what to believe most of the time. She lies through her teeth about even the most trivial matters and then gets angry when she is caught.
~~
Not only that, but a couple of weeks ago, I got accepted into Honors English. The night that I told my mother, Jessie gave me a huge lecture about why I didnt deserve to go into the class and how I could never handle the work. English is my best subject. My sister thinks that if she cant handle something, there is no way in hell that I can. Not only did she rant at me for a half hour, she did it in front of my two best friends, rubbing salt on the wounds. I cried for a half hour while she tried to convince them that I was unworthy of the class.
For all of my life she has treated me as worse than the dog s**t at the bottom of her shoes. Why?!?!?!?!? I dont know what I have done to her!! For all of my life I have been second best in my parents eyes, Jessie was always smarter while Laura hardly passed some of her classes. Jessie does rugby, basketball and soccer while Laura just quit volleyball. Jessie's friends are so much more presentable than Laura's. Jessie Jessie Jessie. That was all I would hear when I was little. Now that the negative spotlight has turned on her, all of her frustration has come onto me. Not only hers, but since my dad movedout(christmas of 2005-2006), my mother put her anger on me. Now with my sisters, I dont know what to do. I have contemplated moving to my dads, but I cannot bring myself to do it since I hate that man and he is as bad as my mother. I know that I will be just as miserable there but withought my friends to help me. I am trapped in a situation that I hate and it just keeps getting worse and worse. I dont know what to do most of the time!!!
Life does not feel like life to me anymore. I only feel that I am exsisting. Instead of seeing the bright colors and joys of life, all I see is grey and the promise of a horrid day spent with my sister. I just cant handle it and I feel like I'm losing my ******** mind. I just dont know what to do.
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Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 5:05 pm
I gave you the best advice I could a while back sweatdrop
But you just have to let it roll off of you. I've had those family members I was just livid at for ******** up their lives, but it's not my choice. It only causes trouble when you try to interfere, you have to let them make their own mistakes :3
And having sex and drinking aren't the work of the devil. I'm still underage and I've had my share of drinking. And when I was underage for sex, I had still done sexual things.
Do I regret them now? Some things, yes, but they were my mistakes to make. It helped me become the person I am today, and look at the good things I've done, whether online or real life.
You proved you were good enough by getting into the class, and for that, you shouldn't listen to her harsh words. 3nodding
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Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 5:33 pm
thanks mimisi, just its so hard sometimes to let things slide
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Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 6:53 pm
Hmm..perhaps stereotypes are different where you are. Where I'm at everyone knows most honors, religious people do the out there stuff. Seriously, ever heard of the preacher's daughter thing? Anyway, at her age the only thing you can do as a sibling is tell her not to make those kinds of mistakes. If she still decides to do so, she was warned and will have to learn from her mistakes.
Congrats on making it into Honors English. Pay your sister's comments no mind. She's obviously just trying to make you feel as bad as she does [even if she won't admit it]. You just do your best and shrug her negative comments off. Only you can tell you what you're capable of.
I understand that feeling of just existing. Believe me it feels even worse when you're older. [I'm trying to tunnel my way out of the at the current time.] You'll pull through it all. Just be strong and seek peace of mind from your friends' support.
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Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 8:48 pm
*hugs in consolation* I wish I had something more to add. But I strongly emphasize the point that you can tell what you are capable of, not anyone else. Congratulations for making it into that class, and when you just can't fall back on family, you do have wonderful friends to turn to. *nods*
I understand, myself, that feeling of just existing. I'm pretty much going through a phase of delusions and emotional/mental instability right now...I'll just leave it at that. sweatdrop
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Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 11:49 pm
 Sadly, sometimes you just have to get out of the way and let people learn from their own screw ups. It's hard to do that with people you care about, but sometimes it's all you can do. Just let her know you're there if she needs you, then go about your own business. Live your life for yourself, better yourself (congrats on making Honors English!!!) and hope she'll see the path she's taking is bad before it's too late.
It really doesn't make it any easier, I know, but the truth of the matter is that the old saying is accurate "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". I've been there... always compared to my "perfect" older sister. And it was tough, but I learned from it. I learned how to be independent because of it. I learned who I was, and not to apologize for it, but to stand up for it regardless of what anyone else had to say. It sucks going through it, but there will, I promise you, come a day when you'll look back and know that you're a stronger woman for having survived it all.
In the meantime, perhaps accidentally set a spider loose in her bed... ninja
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Posted: Wed Apr 18, 2007 6:31 am
First of all, congratulations biggrin Second, your sister is full of s**t. When she tries to "convince" people that you don't deserve it, just remember that you *DID* get it, and nothing your sister says will change the fact. Even better, she's jealous because for once she's in trouble and you are not, and that you got something good, and she didn't! Yeah, when you see her ranting, smile with pride, because she's just jealous and looking for a escape goat. As for the way your parents treat you, I'm afraid I can't help much sad Parents tend to overlook anything good you do, and point out any little wrong thing you do. Just hang in there. If you know you are not wrong, you don't need to feel like you are wrong. You said your sister gets angry when she's caught? A proof that she is spoiled. Pay it no mind. Worry about yourself. If you show dedication to your English class, your parents will notice. They'll probably shot the "at least she's doing something right now". It'll be better than they not recognizing anything. Best of lucks for you. 
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Posted: Wed Apr 18, 2007 9:35 pm
Hula_dancing_monkeyo.O thanks mimisi, just its so hard sometimes to let things slide I understand heart In big things that I've tried to interfere in, I've only failed. I think most of you were around when the thing happened with our first co-cap sweatdrop It always ends badly. As hard as it is, sometimes letting go is the only thing to be done :3
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