Welcome to Gaia! ::

With what your dad said, I woulodn't be surprised if you'd want to turn around and tell him what's what. I know when I got in touch with my dad for the first time a few months ago and told him (that was pretty much the only reason I wanted to talk to him, to tell him he had a granddaughter) he was all like 'I'm going to give your Rich this, that and the other' and I was damn well legal!

We all make mistakes in life, some bigger than others, and sometimes that mistake turns into a great joy. I know I should've made sure me and Rich used protection, but we didn't, and yes I fell pregnant. I think the only person who really wasn't happy about it were a couple of my online friends (though they have stuck by me) and my grandad, because I have always been his 'little princess' and sweet little angel. He never said anything, but his silence when talking about the subject said it all. So I understand that part of things. But at least your mum is sticking by you, even if she's not happy with the idea. Your dad, well, I COULD say a few things, but I can't judge someone without knowing them for myself smile As for the father of your child, you might be surprised and he might want to know, but if he already said if you want to keep it he's leaving, be thankful you're not completely alone.

I do hope things work out well for you. Just remember you haven't ruined your life or your chances for a great education and job, you just might have to wait a little bit longer (or cope with both looking after the child and going to school/college). You've only ruined your chances if you let your chances be ruined.
I take it from your first two sentences that you suffer from depression? Try not to let it get you down. Later pregnancy and giving birth can do that, as I suffered from depression, and then sufferd from post-natal depression. The last thing you need is going into deep depression before you're even halfway or three quarters of the way through the pregnancy. Try to keep positive. I know damn well that it is hard, but it can do damage to your child before they're born. If you need help, get it. It wont do you any good either if you do fall deeper into depression. I know staying positive can be hard, believe me I've been through it and sometimes still do.

I do hope everything works out for the best for you. I know it has for me, even if it is hard smile And I'm here if you need any advice or a chat, or just talk about general stuff about babies biggrin And a good friend of mine is pregnant as well, so I'm helping her out as well. You can go to adults who were older parents and get advice, but the real experience comes from those who are the same as you; young.I didn't have anyone to talk about it with, but now I've gone through it and will be ahead of the people who are just starting out, I'm more than happy to share my experiences and what I've found has worked well for me.

First of all, congratulations. You've made your decision and you're happy with it, and that is all we need! <3
Secondly, don't worry about prenatal vitamins. Lots of people don't swallow pills and you can request chewable ones. Until your first prenatal appointment, I recommend buying some Flintstones vitamins to hold you over. They are sold just about everywhere and every O.B.GYN I have known has recommended them while patients wait for that first big appointment. I even kept them around until my daughter was old enough to chew on them herself. =o3
It is an obstacle, and if you catch all of your opportunities early enough and keep everything going, you won't have a problem. As a fellow early mother, all I can say is work to your potential and be determined. You can excel through anything if you try hard enough.

Good luck, and feel free to PM me whenever you want. ^^

Boyfriend - Make sure he pays child care. He was part of the creation, it's partly his responsibility too. If you are feeling generous, you can research how much an abortion would have cost you and let him just pay that. That way, it's almost as if he aborted himself from the baby. So depending on how you want to go. But I wouldn't let him just leave without taking any responsibility.

Mom/abortion/keeping - Your mom isn't you and, ultimatly, this is your life. Even if she is willing to take complete care of the child and even legally adopt it, you are still the one who has to carry it for nine months. If you are still considering abortion, or if you decide that it's what you want to do, go ahead. It's your body.

Mom otherwise - I'm glad she took it well. It's fantastic that you are going to be getting the help you need during this stressful time smile

Father - I know this probably sounds really stupid, but all the abuse and all the insults are probably because he cares for you. He's worried about you, he's worried about what will happen to you. Unfortunatly, he's also stupid and doesn't seem to realize that the deed is done and that you need SUPPORT, not reproach. Some people are just like that. But I think it is important that you know that he probably does have good intentions under all that evil.

Now, that doesn't mean that you should name your child after him and give him a thank you toast at the baby shower or anything. It just means that you should take it to heart as him hating you. And even if he is giving up on you, and thinking that you've now permanently failed, it doesn't mean that you have to prove him right by getting sick. Finish school. Get a great job. Be the best mother you can be. Prove him wrong. Even if he never admits it and continues to be a jerk, hey, you've just done an awesome job anyway.

And remember, even though half of your genetics are duplicates of his, he's still just another person. There's no reason why you should be taking his abuse to heart any more than you would abuse given by a friend or a stranger on the street.

And that's all I have to say about that. From what I've read here, you sound like a mature and intelligent girl. I have every confidence that if anyone can make it with a baby in tow, you're it.

I honestly haven't kept up with most of the talk in this thread, but noticed the part about not being able to swallow pills. I also have this problem and prenatals are pretty big. If I try to swallow pills, even tiny ones like birth control, I have a problem with the pill getting stuck and caught near the top of my throat. I start panicing and have real issues with swallowing them. Having something to drink with a bit of fizz in it like a drink of soda helps them slide down much easier then if I try plain water. Something a little thicker like milk or if I'm having ice cream/a shake also seems to help because I don't notice the pill as much.

So if you can't get something chewable, that trick might work for you too.

I'm really glad that you made the best decision for you.

You have my support!

I don't have much else to add because everyone else has done a much better job with information and advice, but I wanted to let you know that I, some person you don't know from the internet, support you!

Well, honestly, age and lying about it *are* a big deal. Especially when one party is underage and it can result in legal repercussions for the other person. Had your parents pressed charges, he'd be placed on the Sexual Offenders list for years to come and anytime they update those sites with locations of known sex criminals, he'd be on it. They don't tell what your offense is on those and people assume only ***** are on it. In a long-way of saying it, I'm trying to stress it really is a big deal, even if you don't think so.

When my sister started dating her now-fiance, he said he was 26, she was 20. So he seemed a little old but she gave it a chance. Then one day he left his wallet out and she found out he was 36. She gave him one chance to come clean about anything else he may be hiding. Even when you're older, lying about your age is a big no-no and no matter how much you love a person, it makes a huge difference and you can feel like you don't know them at all.


WTEWYE, is a pretty good book and a really fast read. Just stay out of the Complications section and don't let it panic you. It's known for causing unknown worry and making you feel like you're doing everything wrong at times. Take the diet section with a grain of salt as well. The front sections on developement to every chapter are very good and informative, though.