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 Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2025 4:43 pm
Joy was already up, it seemed - the chapel empty, the sleeping bag neatly rolled up. The slanting beams of early sunlight had finally crept into the high windows, spilling gold across a floor more easily seen than by last night's moody candlelight: all the bright but cracked tiles and Joy's hard work at cleaning them matched by the half-crumbled opulence of the rest of the room.
It wasn't chilled, of course, but a bottle of cold brew was sitting next to the bed for her, along with a little stash of purloined convenience store packets of powdered creamer and sugar, a handful of granola bars and packaged muffins, a bag of cherries, an orange: the humble offerings of the best breakfast she could scrounge without electricity or even a camp stove to make it.
And there was music. Something like a guitar - a lute - heard distantly.
Whether she lingered over her breakfast or made her way upstairs immediately, she would emerge beneath the bright morning sky amid birdsong and windchimes accompanying the instrument, the air clear and sharp as it always is near clean water and fresh with green smells and the perfume cascading from the blossoms crawling thickly over the ruins of the gatehouse, where a single butterfly was perusing its options.
Joy was standing on the ramparts above, where they had arrived near the top of the stairs. Her back was to the bailey - she was unaware of Nis being up - and she leaned on a ruined crenellation apparently in contemplation of the river, her nightclothes covered by a robe drawn loosely over her shoulders. Next to her, seated on the wall, was Gouvernail: the source of the music, with a lute in his hands that looked as solid as he did ephemeral. He was a silvery apparition in the sunlight, but the music was real enough, being plucked in a desultory sort of way. He was not serenading her - he was not performing - he was only occupying his hands while they spoke. His face was not turned down to the strings, but towards his protege with a strange and earnest gravity, the gaze broken when she turned to him to smile and laugh at something she herself had said, and his eyes dropped back down as if occupied with his music. And that smile of hers, too - despite having a certain playful quality - was not without that strange timidity that she had surfaced the night before, so unlike herself.
She glanced down towards the bailey, breaking off from whatever it was that they were discussing and suddenly beaming at Nis, and Gouvernail’s hands fell still on the instrument, his expression returning to one of aloof reserve as she crossed the rampart to call down to her from the top of the stairs in a cheerful voice.
“Morning! I was afraid it would rain, but it's all cleared off. Maybe we can get the boat out after all, when you're done. I got a few hours of sleep, I hope you did too. Did you eat? I've gotta figure out how to get hot coffee out here without having to make a campfire.”
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Posted: Sun Aug 03, 2025 9:31 am
Blinking against the bright sunlight, Nis had made her way slowly to the source of the music, wanting to take her time and enjoy the Garde. She'd downed the bottle of cold brew and eaten the orange and now that she was moving, she was feeling more herself. And that meant she was better able to appreciate all of Joy's hard work in putting this place back together. With a merry disregard for the possibly of tetanus, she padded barefoot up the stairs and out into the light. It didn't take her long to spot Joy and Nail and she had a moment of surprise seeing the ghost playing a lute. But then, this was his place too. Doubtless he had some power here too. And seeing Joy in her robe made Nis feel better about her worn sweatshirt and joggers. Still. As she made her way over, she ran her fingers through her curls, trying to work them into something less like a disheveled cockatiel. As she watched the pair, she thought the vibes were still off, but they weren't setting her teeth on edge. She was confident in her ability to remain civil. Then Joy spotted her and she found herself grinning back. "Good morning to you both! I did get some sleep, thank you! And a million billion blessings upon you and yours for the coffee and food. It's a scientific fact that hangry Nisses are bad company." Heading up the stairs, she gazed admiringly over everything. Yes, she loved her wonder deeply, but she'd be a filthy liar if she didn't admit that this place was one of the prettiest she'd ever seen. "I think I envy you and your sunlight and ramparts," she added. "It's never gotten this bright on Nis, plus well. You know. The whole giant underground lake thing."
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eldritch stardust
eldritch stardust
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Posted: Sun Aug 03, 2025 1:56 pm
"But Nis is so peaceful," she said, reaching out to gently push Nis's hair off her temple, and then smiling a sort of satisfied smile. No mark. As expected. "And you've got that sandy beach. I think all of us have a lot to envy from each other, sometimes." She said this, because it was the polite thing to say. But she was thinking of Ekstrom's dismal fortress, and she was thinking even of Nis, much as she had loved it, with a smug satisfaction. No place like home. Not that the Garde was home, of course. "I'm on the brink of being hangry myself," she continued, "so I'm going to go take care of that while you two chat." The word chat did not seem applicable to Gouvernail in any way whatsoever, and she seemed aware of it, making a vague face while her back was to him that was almost apologetic. She squeezed her hand as if abandoning her with encouragement to some grueling chore, before heading off down the stairs and leaving them alone. He had watched her go for a moment, but he turned his attention back to Nis, bending to gently lean the lute against the rampart (its ghostly strings dissipating as soon as his hands were no longer on it), and he gestured for her to have a seat if she wanted it. "I am not sure how much use I can be of to you," he said, in a voice of quiet reserve. "But whatever service I can be to a friend of the Garde I am thankful for." And he repeated that gesture he'd made the day before as he said it, that brief and formal bow of the head. "She is indebted to you already, as I understand it."
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Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2025 11:04 am
”Oh, we can’t have you hangry too,” Nis replied with a laugh, grinning at how Joy checked her temple for marks. “Go eat and I’m sure we’ll be fine here. It’s a lovely day and I promise I won’t vex him too much while you’re gone!”
Not that she had plans to vex anyone, but who knew what, if anything, might set off a ghost. Arching an eyebrow at the hand squeeze, Nis held her tongue until Joy was out of sight. Turning to face Nail, she gave her own little bow thought she was certain it must look ridiculous given her pajama’d state. Still, it was the polite thing to do. And when he indicated she should sit, she pushed herself gingerly up onto the rampart so she could see everything below.
“Please don’t think of it as being useful,” she replied breezily. “That sounds entirely too formal. I’d rather look at it as a conversation between colleagues if that’s all right. We’re both knights, after all, even if our philosophies might be a little different.”
She’d already decided that she wouldn’t refer to him in the past tense to his face. That would have been rude beyond reckoning and besides. Until he returned to the Cauldron, he was still a knight. Just an incorporeal knight. Not that she was going to bring up the Cauldron around him. That was a subject he’d have to be the one to introduce. But as it stood, he’d already given her a nice little opening by mentioning Joy. Smiling, she leaned back slightly, lacing her fingers together over one knee.
“I don’t consider there to be a debt, sir,” she replied. “Joy is a trusted friend and friends are meant to help each other. I would hate to think that either of you might think I was owed a debt. It sort of goes against my purpose in serving Cosmos, you see. Or at least how I see my purpose.”
She paused, trying to think of a good way to ask her questions without seeming insensitive before sighing and deciding to go speak honestly.
“I’m afraid that you’re the first and only spirit I’ve ever met and I don’t really want to say or do something that might distress you. I’ve not stumbled across any memories of my time in the Academy, so I don’t know if we ever met before or if you were already stationed by the time I began training or vice versa. I was hoping that you might be willing to share your memories of the Academy with me. Nothing too personal, of course, just… hmm… general impressions. I’m happy to answer any questions you may have too. If I can.”
That was all polite and neutral enough, right? She wasn’t putting pressure on him to answer, though she was worried that that whole indebted thing might make him feel like he had to. Hopefully not though. She didn’t particularly want the strange burden of a dead man thinking he owed her anything.
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eldritch stardust
eldritch stardust
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Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2025 1:27 pm
He did not react to being called sir despite the offers of informality. Nor did he react much at all, really, although at the comment about not distressing him there was a flicker of movement in his expression that might or might not have been him setting his teeth. Still, his voice was neutral when he answered her. “I did not enjoy my time there,” he said bluntly. Were Joy there she might have observed that this meant nothing since he never enjoyed anything if he could help it. “Understand that it was made to cater to many, and could not cater to the needs of every young person that came to its doors. But it was necessary. If the institution of Knighthood was to continue, it should not have been made to continue without it. I understand that you were left without even a mentor - to learn what comes in your way. This seems very cruel. Were I left to simply discover that world for myself piecemeal while contending with an active battlefield as you have been - unarmed - I would have been useless.” Not dead, just useless, as if this was worse. And then, still neutral, still blunt: “I have no memory of you as you were, although perhaps we had acquaintances in common. But as you say, our time may not have overlapped. I had been some twenty years gone from the Academy when my time as a Knight ended, and involved myself with its business as little as possible. My duty, and thank God for it, was to the Earth.” A faint strain of haughtiness had filtered into that last sentence, almost defensive.
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Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2025 2:36 pm
Nodding a little to show that she understood, Nis grimaced slightly. It sounded like every bad boarding school trope she’d ever read. Though she wasn’t so sure she agreed with his assessment that knights shouldn’t exist without an Academy. If she hadn’t had her own duty and wonder to see her through what had arguably been one of the worst points in her life, she wasn’t sure what would have become of her. Nothing good, of that she was certain. His neutrality made her wonder though. It almost seemed like a sort of shield to her. Which, fair. She was a stranger to him after all and he was being rather put upon in his own home by her curiosity. Still. “Perhaps it is cruel, but it is the hand I was dealt and I have made the best I can of the situation. Though, perhaps we can agree that the senshi might be worse off than us. I would prefer to trust to my old memories than the words of half or un-informed mauvians. I’m sure they mean well, but… well.” It was the closest she would ever come to criticizing either senshi or the cats. She was quite fond of both even if their antics sometimes made her want to rip out her own hair. And if she was disappointed by Nail’s blunt declaration of not having known her, it didn’t show. She simply inclined her head graciously and considered his words. She didn’t understand his haughtiness at all, though she had no argument with him being proud of his service to Earth. She was beginning, perhaps, to understand some of Joy’s reactions when the subject of this particular ghost came up. “Certainly fair,” she said instead of what she was thinking. “After all, there’d be no point to involving yourself once you’d been stationed here unless you’d been brought on as an instructor. As that seems to have not been the case,” she paused and shrugged as elegantly as one could in an old, worn sweatshirt. Then, one of her hands released her knee and reached up, fingertips fluttering above her heart and starseed. “I suppose that I’m as proud to have served where I did and still do as you are. And yes, perhaps my lack of a mentor was cruel on a cosmic level, but I’m not sure I would want to do anything differently if I were to be given the choice. There is something… almost sweet about recovering the old memories and learning about who I was.” Her voice trailed off for a moment before she chuckled and shook her head, amused by her own thoughts. Then, she faced the ghost and smiled, a warm, bright expression that was unforced. “Yes, I’m proud to serve. I am Nis, a knight of Cosmos and guardian of the lake and a long dead, fantastical beast that I will never cease to mourn. But I’m also Myth, humble antiques dealer and shopkeep. In the eyes of a cold and logical world, I am a complete nonsense and I wouldn’t have it any other way. And I’m not sure that my experiences have been harmed by there no longer being an Academy. Perhaps someday, when I am older and presumably wiser, you and I might sit and compare notes to see which method is the better. Though I suspect we won’t arrive at a satisfactory conclusion. But we may both be enriched in the sharing, don’t you think?” We each serve in our own ways, she thought. It made her a little sad to think that Nail seemed to have had no joy in his service, but she was guessing based on how dour he seemed. Maybe that was just How He Was. Maybe centuries of being dead did it. How was she to know? Suddenly, her introspective mood seemed to vanish and her eyes became bright with curiosity. “Tell me, did Joy show you the seagulls? What do you think of them if you don’t mind my asking? And if you don’t feel like answering, please don’t feel like you must. I’m perfectly content to sit here and enjoy your company and the sunny day.” Well, maybe not entirely content with his company, but he’d been very good so far about humoring her and kindness didn’t cost a thing.
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eldritch stardust
eldritch stardust
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Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2025 3:20 pm
The emotion, this time - be it anger or something else - was less readily suppressed, and apparently took several seconds of willful mastery to be brought under his command. "She did," he said simply. And accordingly, in agreement with her offer, he did not feel that he must answer any more than that. He did backtrack, however, away from this gesture of friendliness on her part and back towards that of their shared title - more comfortable, maybe, with a colleague than anything that was trying to take the shape of a friend. "The current Garde -" and how meticulous he was to not use any name for her "-has known a great deal of both help and kindness from Mauvians. Perhaps we can no more blame them for the deficiencies of their knowledge than we can blame ourselves. But certainly one wonders how it affects them to awaken a Senshi as things are now. It is not clear to me whether they actively conscript, or only soften the inevitable." He paused. "But I suppose a senshi, in this time, might choose to turn her back on an office she did not ask for." Whether he thought a Knight could do the same was also not clear. "There was a time when this was a stronger distinction. We," and as he said it he gestured, absently, at the emblem on his shoulder, "were at one time given the choice, however little like a choice it seemed. I have wondered if this makes it easier for those like you - who served before - to see the duty of this life as a choice likewise." It was almost a question, phrased just enough as a statement to give her, too, an opportunity to decide that she didn't need to humor him.
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Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2025 4:49 pm
Blinking blandly, Nis had to fight to keep from moving or showing any of her surprise on her face. Something she’d said or just what she was seemed to have struck a nerve. Well, that was unfortunate. And why wouldn’t he say Joy’s name? Maybe a disconnect because he still saw himself as Joyeuse Garde? She imagined it would probably be uncomfortable to have two Nises walking around. Maybe she’d talk that way too. But somehow she doubted it. And interesting that he referred to senshi purely in the feminine. But maybe back then, that was just what the senshi he might’ve met were. So many questions that she knew she would never ask. Not out of fear, not really. But more because, deep down, she simply had no desire to pick a fight with a dead man. Therefore, she made a soft noise to acknowledge that she was listening and only murmured, “Well. I imagine the answer to that one depends on the cat.” Ah, but the question of choice. Now that was a fascinating one. Closing her eyes for a moment, she tipped her face up to the sun and sighed. This place really was beautiful. Even if inhabited by the grouchiest of ghosts. Keeping her eyes closed, she considered his words and made another little noise. And then, she answered. “At the time, it felt like there was no choice at all. It took time and some visits to my wonder to begin to understand. And then,” she added, cracking open an eye and arching her brow, “it’s a bit difficult to say ‘oh, no thank you’ after you’ve witnessed the theft and destruction of an innocent starseed. I’m still not sure there ever was a choice. It’s just unapologetically a part of who I am.” Then, she snorted in a decidedly unladylike way and her expression turned mildly sour. “D’you know, one of my memories is of being forced into an alliance marriage? And my sense of duty at the time was such that I chased away someone I loved and would have died for because it had been decreed that I would do thus and so. I don’t have bad memories of that marriage. I was never treated badly that I can recall. But I don’t think I was ever truly happy unless you count the times I spent alone with my lake and my charge. There’s even a crystal bridge connecting the two wonders, mine and his. I’d love to take an axe to the blasted thing, but at this point? What purpose would it serve? Not sure why I’m telling you this. I doubt you even care, but this talk of choice and the lack of made me think of it, I suppose.” She’d closed her eyes again, not wanting to see his expression. She wasn’t sure which would be worse, if he pitied her or felt disdain for her ever questioning her duty. Either would likely drive her into a quiet fury. With luck, he simply wouldn’t give a flying ******** either way. But it felt good to get those words and feelings out in the open air. And speaking of no ******** to give… “I suspect,” she said, voice drily candid, “that I’ve somehow managed to offend you. I’m just not sure if it’s something I’ve said or merely the fact that I exist. If it’s the former, I’m honestly sorry because I had genuinely been looking forward to meeting you and I never wanted to cause harm. And if it’s the latter, all I can say is I was never consulted on whether I wanted to be born or not, so I can’t really apologize for that one as it was out of my hands. All that to say that I won’t bother you again after I finish my visit with Joy. And if I’ve misinterpreted things, all I can say in my defense is you’re incredibly reserved and difficult to read.” Going silent, she finally opened her eyes and stared down at the river, watching the sunlight sparkle off of the water’s surface. Doubtless she’d be yeeted from the premises any moment and Joy would be upset with her because she’d managed to make Ghost Grandpa angry. Then, she frowned and looked sheepish. “You play beautifully by the way. I should have said so earlier, but I wasn’t sure how you’d take it. But since I’m going for sincere honesty, I wanted to let you know. I’ve never heard such pretty music.”
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eldritch stardust
eldritch stardust
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Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2025 5:18 pm
"It was a part of my education," he said mechanically, as he had said it to Joy. "She was very kind to procure it for me." And he kept his eyes on the lute as he continued, after a long pause during which he was clearly hesitating over whether to speak at all. "My brothers, as well," he said. "Alliance marriages, as you call it. Perhaps not treating a wife badly, as you put it, is as much as I might have aspired to, as I do not believe they aspired to more themselves. I was better suited for the duties that I was called to. It would never have occurred to me to try and do both." It was no more than he'd ever said to Joy, in some of their more recent conversations. But the fact that he was offering it to anyone that wasn't her might have astonished her, if she'd been there to hear it. There was another long, fraught pause wherein he visibly tread along the precipice of saying more. But he did, at last. "You have neither offended nor harmed me. As for my reserve, I have been accused of it before. I, also, did not ask to be born as I was. It is never my intention to - be as I am. Perhaps the current Garde was moved by - perhaps she did not prepare you for my being as I am. Or perhaps she did, and you chose to believe this one of those capricious cruelties she delights in. In either case, I am grateful to you, that you looked forward to it." He did not apologize for it being a let down any more than she apologized for existing, however. And then, quietly, with a gentleness that might have been more for the thought of Joy than for Nis and her troubles: "She is not a creature of regrets, and she has pity for others who are. She would bring an axe for both of you, if you asked her."
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Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2025 7:15 pm
"My understanding of the context of those memories was that it was to ensure descendants of my line. As as we were both Cosmos bound and our wonders very near each other, I suppose it was logical. No idea if children ever happened. I'm honestly not sure how I feel about the idea of me having great-great-many times great grandkids somewhere out there." Why she felt relief to know that she hadn't caused offense she couldn't say. Maybe because the idea of being a guest and insulting the host horrified her. But he was actually talking to her. They were having a proper conversation. It was still weird he wouldn't say Joy's name, but she wasn't going to pursue that rabbit. Instead, she looked thoughtful as she ran through every mention of Nail that Joy had supplied. There was no way that she was going to bring up the starseed discussion, that was private and she wouldn't break trust. But she could still tell him some things. "She only ever said you were reserved, but reserved can be different things to different people. I don't think she was trying to play with either of us in this case. I simply didn't understand what she meant when she said 'reserved'. For the record," she continued, finally looking up at him. "I am glad to have met you. She may not act it, but she holds you in high esteem, I think. She trusts you and for her, I suspect that is a high compliment indeed." Nis would have gone as far as suspecting that on some level, Joy loved her ancestor deeply. If her reaction to the whole starseed conversation had been any indication, she thought that Joy would be deeply hurt if anything happened to Nail. And it was the gentleness in his voice that startled her into a soft laugh. Smiling without constraint, she shook her head and leaned in towards him slightly as if imparting a secret. "There is a reason why I haven't mentioned it to her. I know she would and depending on her mood, she'd probably try to smuggle explosives in as well to make sure the job was done thoroughly." The thought of Joy armed with an axe and dynamite was an extremely funny one. However, in deference to Nail, she kept herself under control. She had a feeling that he'd said a lot for him and it couldn't have been easy. And out of respect for that, she'd be sure to only tell Joy that he'd answered her questions about the Academy and given her a great deal to think about. Then, impulsively, she said, "I don't know the rules for people like you, but if you ever wish to come and are able, you are welcome on Nis. And before you have a chance to wonder, I am not making the offer as any sort of bribe or appeasement. I think you'd like it up there. It's peaceful and the trees are lovely." Sliding gently from the rampart, she stretched and turned to Nail, placing her hand over her heart and giving him a low, respectful bow. As she straightened, she gave him a crooked smile. "I don't think we're ever going to be besties, but I hope that we understand each other better. Please know that I do respect you and should you ever require the services of a Cosmos knight, please feel free to call on me. This includes if Joy is being especially silly and you need me to sit on her until she calms down."
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eldritch stardust
eldritch stardust
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Posted: Mon Aug 04, 2025 8:00 pm
While he reacted to this third party affirmation of Joy's trust in him with visible emotion, he did not give way to it, nor was it renewed when she made an invitation to him that it would have been impossible for him to accept even had he wanted to. He also did not smile at her little joke, or even offer the obvious rebuttal that she was welcome to try and see how far it got her. Instead, he dipped his head again, although it came after a long pause when she mentioned her services as a Cosmos knight. If Joy had been there she might have seen the connection of certain dots in his head between her introducing the topic of Nis and having the most painful conversation that had ever unfolded between the former and the current Garde. "Thank you," he said at last. And then, reaching down to take the lute back into his hands - the silvery strings emerging again as he did so - he added: "Were my memory less broken than it is, it would be an honor to tell you all that I could of the Academy and the world as it was to us then. She will want to show you things." He did not play, however, merely folding his arms atop the lute and leaning on them, his eyes cast down towards the bailey instead. The reason for his attention was obvious a moment later as Joy's voice rang up from below, apparently in response to seeing Nis rising. "Hope you're ready for some rowing!" she called cheerfully. "I haven't had a chance to show this thing off to anyone else yet, so you get to be the first one to risk capsizing in it." "It is perfectly safe," he said quietly, for Nis's ears only, finally pulling his eyes away from his protege below and turning them to the instrument, making pointless little movements as if to tune what could not possibly need tuning - as if he looked only for some familiar thing to do with hands that were forever useless to him now. "I believe that if it capsized, she would find a way to make the river apologize for it." This was very near being a joke - possibly as close as he was willing to get with a stranger. And then: "It is good to see the Garde receiving visitors again. I hope that whatever memories you continue to receive are pleasant ones to you."
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Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2025 10:05 am
Unbothered by the lack of reaction, Nis nodded her appreciation and understanding. She wasn’t sure his memory was broken, per se. But she wondered if there weren’t rules in place for how much ghosts were allowed to recall. Or… maybe not ghosts so much as starseeds. Because she sure didn’t have all her memories of before either. She’d have to take some time to consider that more. But later. “The honor would be mine, to listen,” she replied. It felt like the right thing to say in the moment. And now that she had a better idea of the former guardian, she was beginning to think that she’d judged him far more harshly than he deserved. No doubt he could be infuriating at times, though she hadn’t witnessed that part of him. But after the little things he’d said and the clear trouble he’d had saying them… She wondered if he wasn’t just at the extreme end of introversion. Or maybe he just didn’t people well. It wasn’t her business or her call to make. But the vibes no longer seemed so off. Before she could say anything else, she heard Joy calling and couldn’t keep from smiling and shaking her head. She even turned her head just enough to let Nail see her wink in response to his words before murmuring back, “Thank you. And I’ve no doubt you’re correct. She is rather a force to be reckoned with when she chooses to be.” That he’d felt comfortable enough to make even that mild joke felt like something of a compliment. Giving a last smile and nod to Nail, she turned and headed for the stairs. But, before she could get too far down, she turned and waved. “Thank you! It was good to meet you! Truly!” Then, she ran the rest of the way down the stairs, merrily calling out to Joy, “I’m sure we’ll be fine if it does. We’re big girls. We can handle it! Let’s see this noble vessel of yours.”
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eldritch stardust
eldritch stardust
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