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Gold_Star_For_Robot_Boy Crew
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 Posted: Sun Jul 22, 2018 9:55 am
[Pic to be added] A utilitarian room with the barest of amenities. Apart from the walls, nothing is hard, or presents enough of a surface one could jump from it and damage any property. The floors are institutional cement, slightly stained, the mattress atop it a thin pallet with an incongruously cheerful patterned quilt. There is also a wooden crucifix nailed to the wall above the door, with the Lord's Prayer written along one wall in calligraphic script.
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Posted: Thu Aug 02, 2018 1:21 pm
 ·.·•✧•·.·•✧•  •✧•·.·•✧•·.·The love is lost
Beauty and light
Have vanished from garden of delight •÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•Bare feet padded against the cement as Anselm lead Lokeah to the cell he had been designated, stopping right in front of the door to the cell when he saw Honey. He had been wondering where the other slave had been all this time as it was usually Honey's job to be doing what he currently was. However at the sight of Honey's injuries he merely looked away as if he saw nothing and turned his attention to Lokeah once more, a silent promise to not say a word of Honey's state to their master. He then opened the door and ushered Lokeah inside before closing it once more after joining the other. "I'm sorry this is where you ended up. I was once down here as well and it is not pleasant. All I can do is pray that you're one of the luckier ones that is left with some will of your own much like St. Vier's right hand man and me. I already know you're special from how different St. Vier's actions were with you so there's hope still. Very few see St.Vier's rooms so early on in their...training here, I feel he wants something different from you a companion or friend maybe but I'm not entirely sure as St. Vier is very unpredictable. However I will not deny that I wish the best for you, you are very intriguing to me and I want to get to know you more if I can. I know my actions upstairs were cruel but as I said I really have no choice. St. Vier and his haven are all I know, I'm a slave and he is my master, his order is absolute. However I can at least offer you some company here when I can give it so you're not alone like I was, " Anselm explained, his voice just as sincere as it was upstairs. None of his words were lies either, he honestly did wish the best for Lokeah and hoped that he would remain at least somewhat himself after everything he was more than likely going to get put through. He knew that Lokeah probably wouldn't believe and may even come to hate him but no matter what his hope for the shifter would never change. He wished Lokeah the best and hoped that maybe someday they could stand as equals in this haven but only time would tell for sure. At that thought Anselm turned toward the door and spoke once more, "You still have some hope Lokeah, listen and obey and things will start to look up I promise." At that Anselm opened the door and moved to leave.•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•The dreams are gone
Midnight has come
The darkness is our new kingdom Find me if you wish: Cell 16Let's move on: Lokeah with Honey in passingNothing fancy: outfit in picturesSuccumb to the sounds: nothing at the moment
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Posted: Fri Aug 03, 2018 6:20 am
«Lokeah»
Captured||Trickster God||Wanna Play?
________________________________________
____________________________________
He had followed Anselm without trouble, without trying yet again to make an escape. He knew full well he would be stopped by the other male after all. Instead he spent that time in silence, stewing over the unpleasantness of his situation.
When they arrived back in the below, Lokeah noticed a new face. A man he didn’t recognize leaning against the door of one of the cells, to which he would assume might belong to the blue haired male that arrived down here with him earlier. He wouldn’t mention it though, wouldn’t address the other free roaming being that reside in this building. He looked the man over only to gauge the level of threat he might provide… not much at the moment, by the looks of it.
Lokeah’s head hung low as he entered the tiny room, and almost immediately he grabbed for the overly cheerful quilt that lay on the bed and wrapped himself up like a child. He hadn’t the energy to cover himself up by other means right now. And as he did this, he listened to Anselm speak.
He hated every word that was spoken. He hated this other male that was in this room so much, not only for the pain but also this suddenly sincere method of excuse mixed with a tinge of advice that the other thought might make amends. His shift in attitude and tone reminded him of St.Vier, even if it was only to abide by his master's wishes for his own safety.
“I don’t believe you. I don’t ******** want to hear your s**t, because you ain’t sorry for anything.” He hissed, not even facing the other male as tears began to bubble up an stream down his distraught face. It was starting to hit him now, just how terrified he was of his own future in this place. Everything about it screamed that he’d face more unpleasant situations, and now he’d be left alone in a cramped little room with nothing but an uncomfortable bed and blanket?
Alone…
Not again…
Memories flashed back in his mind from those first days he spent alone after his lover died. Those long days that followed only to be broken up by the short interaction he’d have with other males who refused to trust him. It was a loneliness he seeked to end when he met St.Vier… the one man that would speak to him like a friend and welcome him in. Lokeah shook his head at these thoughts, the messy feelings he had from the betrayal.
Turning, a hand reached out and no word was spoken as it attempt to grab onto whatever bit of clothing it could. To stop the other from leaving. He didn’t want to admit that he wanted the company… even if he hated the other male.
Ooc: Yay, new image for the sad boy♥
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________________________________________
Who are you?: Anselm
Where: Room 16
Mood: scared, exhausted
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Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2018 4:46 pm
·.·•✧•·.·•✧• •✧•·.·•✧•·.·The love is lost
Beauty and light
Have vanished from garden of delight •÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•The harsh words that fell from Lokeah's lips came as no surprise to Anselm since he had expected it. However what did surprise him was the sudden onslaught of feelings that washed over him and caused him to nearly fall to his knees. Anger, fear, loneliness, feelings that weren't his own but ones he understood very well. It was this distraction that allowed Lokeah to grab onto Anselm's clothes and stop him. However Anselm remained silent for a while as he fought to control his Empathy and after a few minutes managed to do just that. It was at this point he turned to face Lokeah, his green hues glistening with barely held back tears, and walked over to him. He then knealt down in front of Lokeah and after a brief moment hesitation wrapped his arms around Lokeah. He held him in silence for a while and then pulled away before speaking, his voice kind with hints of sadness, "I'm sorry that this is happening to you, I would never wish this upon anyone. I'm also sorry for all my actions upstairs, I know they were cruel but St. Vier's word is absolute. I have no memory of my past, no memory of who I am, this haven is all I know. I don't like doing what I'm doing but I don't really have a choice in the matter if I want to keep my life, if St. Vier determines I'm no longer useful then he'll have me killed. If you want to hate me fine, don't believe that's fine to, but at least understand that I'll help you in anyway I can so we both make it through this mess alive alright."•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•The dreams are gone
Midnight has come
The darkness is our new kingdom Find me if you wish: Cell 16Let's move on: LokeahNothing fancy: outfit in picturesSuccumb to the sounds: nothing at the moment
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Posted: Tue Aug 07, 2018 8:09 am
«Lokeah»
Captured||Trickster God||Wanna Play?
________________________________________
____________________________________
The following moments didn’t quite turn out according to the needy boys plans but then again, they hadn’t seemed to lately anyhow. He had reached out for the other male without much thought, only wishing not to be left alone in this tiny box he now had to call home. He initially expected a cold reaction, some form of disinterest… he didn’t expect an embrace.
Lokeah’s eyes widened in a form of shock and his grip on the other males clothing quickly released in favor of clutching his blanket instead. His body began to shake, a reaction that came from the lingering fear that further harm might be brought to him even if that wasn’t the case. The god listened to the words of the male whose personality had drastically changed from what it was in the previous room and walk down here. They were remorseful, but he didn’t believe that this couldn’t also be a sort of act. If he played to St.Viers needs to get on his good side, this could very well be an act to lull him into another false sense of security. Lokeah had already lost that sense of trust in both males.
This did however, provide Lokeah energy to an extent similar to that of the petting earlier. He used it to shift the ears and tail, removing them from his body for the time being. With his shifting overall being out of whack, this was partially a cautious test as to what he could do properly.
“Don’t touch me.” He hissed, and hands came up in a defensive, but light, effort to push Anselm away. “I don’t trust you. I just don’t wanna be alone right now.” They were harsh words, and perhaps that would deter Anselm from wanting to stick around, but they were his true feelings right now. If he’d trusted the other male, well then he might have tried to milk this remorseful act of affection while he could. Oh well.
“What benefit is there to you for helping me? To make it easier to ruin my life?”
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________________________________________
Who are you?: Anselm
Where: Room 16
Mood: angry, exhausted
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Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2018 2:29 pm
·.·•✧•·.·•✧• •✧•·.·•✧•·.·The love is lost
Beauty and light
Have vanished from garden of delight •÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•The harsh words and the push away once again came as no surprise to Anselm and he released the shifter. However the accusations that fell from Lokeah's lips moments later hit Anselm hard, unexpectedly hard. Anselm was used to being hated, scorned, accused of not caring, so much so that he had grown numb to it. So why did the same accusations he had come to expect hurt and even some what anger him so much coming from the male before him? Was it because he had been in his shoes once before? No if that were the case then it would've bothered him when others said it. So then it had to be something else, but what? Maybe it's because the feelings he had felt coming from Lokeah moments before were identical to his own. That had to be it, there was no other explanation that he could think of. At that thought Anselm rose to his feet and spoke up, a small amount of anger mixing with the sadness and hurt in his voice as he fought back tears he hadn't even noticed were threatening to fall, "You want the truth, helping you doesn't benefit me in any way, if anything it's risky for me. If St. Vier caught me in here talking to you, comforting you like I am right now I'd be in big trouble, trouble that could very easily end with me dead. I have no desire to ruin your life and I never will, I'm not as horrible as you think I am. Do I care about St. Vier? Yes because this haven is all I have any memory of. Am I afraid of St. Vier? Yes because the man is terrifyingly unpredictable and I never know what he'll do next. However despite all that I'm offering to help you and I never do that, if you refuse my help then fine but if I can do something to help you stay sane in this place then I want to no matter the risk. I don't want you to end up broken and mindless with no identity of your own, I don't want you to forget who you are like I have, that is the ******** truth Lokeah."•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•The dreams are gone
Midnight has come
The darkness is our new kingdom Find me if you wish: Cell 16Let's move on: LokeahNothing fancy: outfit in picturesSuccumb to the sounds: nothing at the moment
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Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2018 10:54 am
«Lokeah»
Captured||Trickster God||Wanna Play?
________________________________________
____________________________________
Pain. Anger. Those were two distinct emotions that Lokeah would find in the other male’s voice, and to be quite honest it wasn’t that part that would bother the boy. It was more the fluctuations in the other males’ emotions and train of thought bothered him. In Vier’s room, it felt as though the other male had no emotion even when subduing him. Then there was some brief remorse, then great sadness, and now… well, there was the addition of anger. There was pulling back from what was initially said. Sporattic behavior that reminded him of a certain someone.
It was so much like St.Vier that you could tell this was the only way the male knew to act. It was like he’d picked it up from his time here and that could be dangerously unpredictable. Lokeah needed to treat this more carefully.
“That don’t seem the case for that other guy out there. Seemed pretty damn content talking to whoever’s in that cell.” He spat. And as he said that, he did notice that same male passing through. They locked eyes for only but a short moment and something about the man gave him the chills. There were antlers protruding from his head, that was a nice trait, and the males body looked as if he'd recently run into trouble. That was as much as the boy could gather in the quick moment when his eyes strayed from staring eyes. He didn’t want to meet this man, not if he could help it… he was creepy.
Then he sighed and his tone would soften. “I never said I was rejecting anything. I just don’t trust you.” Lokeah felt the need to establish that difference. He was smart enough to know that it was unwise to make enemies, even if he had no intention of trust.
“Why would you risk your own safety for someone you don’t even know…?” He asked hesitantly. Selflessness was a strange and unfamiliar trait to the selfish god and he honestly couldn’t say he would do the same for Anselm if the roles were switched. “I don’t intend to lose myself like you have, I don’t bend to someone’s will that easily.”
But then a sense of uncertainty fell over his face. “But uhm… did St.Vier steal your memory?” He asked quietly. It didn’t sound like a possible act, not to him, but it was a terrifying thought nonetheless. His memories were so precious to him, and the thought of losing them was painful. He didn’t want to lose the small fragments that he had left of his friend…
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________________________________________
Who are you?: Anselm
Where: Room 16
Mood: upset, exhausted, reasonably accepting
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Posted: Sun Aug 12, 2018 5:11 pm
·.·•✧•·.·•✧• •✧•·.·•✧•·.·The love is lost
Beauty and light
Have vanished from garden of delight •÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•Anselm took a deep breath to better control his emotions and returned to his knees, making sure to sit a little bit further away. He then sighed and started talking, though there was still some traces of anger in his voice, "He's in the same boat as I am, that's why he didn't enter the cell. We can talk to you guys but actually going in your cells is what's risky. We're not allowed to enter the cells unless we're helping with your training usually and I rarely do that." As he spoke his voice steadily got a little more irritated and he took another deep breath to calm down once more. It was at this point Lokeah's own voice toned down and Anselm sighed in response to his words before responding verbally, "Honestly I expected that, it's not the first time I've been told I'm untrustworthy by others like you and it probably won't be the last. It's painful to hear but I can deal with it. I don't ask for you guys to trust me because I know I won't always be able to keep that trust, but I'll do my best to make sure you keep at least some part of yourself after everything is over." Lokeah's next words actually threw Anselm off a little bit because it was something he was wondering himself. Why did he want to help this particular person over all the others he could've helped before, even he didn't fully understand. However he did know that at least part of it was their similar emotions, emotions Anselm knew all to well but was good at hiding. At that thought Anselm looked down and began to idly twirl some of his long hair in his fingers as he spoke, "To be honest I don't even know entirely why myself, though part of it is the emotions running through you are the same ones I feel. That sense of lonliness and sadness I understand all too well because even if I don't show it those feelings are a constant thing for me as well." It was at this point Lokeah claimed that he wouldn't fall that easily and Anselm looked at him, his eyes slightly narrowed and his tone harsh as he spoke, "You have no idea what St. Vier is capable of, you've only seen pieces of what he can do. You have no idea what that man will do to get what he wants, he's killed slaves before simply because the buyer they were originally intended for didn't want them anymore, don't underestimate St. Vier or that will be your downfall." However the next question Lokeah asked surprised Anselm to a point where he just stared at Lokeah with confusion and he looked back down once more, seeming to be thinking. After a short silence Anselm spoke once more, though his voice was full of confusion and uncertainty, "I...I don't think so, St. Vier is capable of many things but I don't think erasing someone's memory is one of them. Honestly I believe my memory was already fading when I was first found by St. Vier because even though I don't know my exact age I know that I've been around for a long time thanks to the few flashes of my memory I get from time to time. However those few flashes are extremely vague so I can't get a clear picture of what my life was before this place and the rest of my memory is cloudy. Literally the only thing I can remember with complete certainty is that I'm from a place known as Germany and my name is Anselm Beilschmidt, that's it. It frustrates me that I have no idea what I am, who I'm supposed to be, and it's constantly on my mind. Outside I may seem calm or even emotionless but inside my mind's in complete turmoil and I feel lost and alone. That's why I keep saying that I understand how you feel even if you hate me, do you understand now?"•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•The dreams are gone
Midnight has come
The darkness is our new kingdom Find me if you wish: Cell 16Let's move on: LokeahNothing fancy: outfit in picturesSuccumb to the sounds: nothing at the moment
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Posted: Mon Aug 13, 2018 10:33 am
«Lokeah»
Captured||Trickster God||Wanna Play?
________________________________________
____________________________________
It was good that the other male understood the situation. That Lokeah’s lack of trust was valid in the violent captivity he was so recently brought into.
He was mostly quiet between the questions, taking in whatever information the answers might bring that could lead to his own benefit. The god, still wrapped in the blanket as if he found it safe, plopped himself down on the less than comfortable mattress across the small room from Anselm. This was a sign that he had no intention to make a move right now. That he knew how useless it would be to try and run. He may as well get used to it, he supposed.
“You say that… but you have no idea how I feel. You have no idea where my loneliness stems from.” Lokeah said and clutched his chest. It was getting difficult not to cry again. “I doubt you’ve ever felt so close to someone that losing them tore you apart from the inside.” That was an assumption, and a selfish thought in a world where that feeling was so familiar to its inhabitants. Yet, to him this was a valid thought based off the fact that this hell hole was all the other male knew.
However, Anselm’s advice that came soon after, though perhaps undeserved, was exceedingly helpful to the boy. He had assumed that what he’d witnessed may have been the extent of what to expect, and it was a lot… but according to this other slave… there was more. There was a possibility for further punishment and pain if he disobeyed, and that in itself was unpleasant, but it was scary to think what else the man might do.
“I’ll… remember that advice. I’ve already learned once what trust will bring me with that man.” He said softly, pulling the blanket around himself tighter for that moment and he remain silent to listen again.
It was comforting to know that despite the nature of the place, it was still a possibility to retain some sense of identity, and that the possibility of losing memory may just be slim. It was starting to become clearer to Lokeah just who this person before him actually was… at least to some extent. So in turn he wanted to give his own bit of advice. “Someone I cared about used to do a lot of terrible things, things that he needed to in order to survive, but would later regret.” He started and the wrap around him loosened a bit. “I would always tell him, that it’s useless to dwell on your past self, no matter who you were. What’s important is who you are now.”
It was difficult to tell if this would be comforting, but he felt that Anselm could do well without paining himself over an old self. He didn’t even know why he cared enough to say that much. There was just something about the other male that compelled him to do so... maybe it was the fact that he stayed, even after all the yelling and hurtful words.
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________________________________________
Who are you?: Anselm
Where: Room 16
Mood: upset, exhausted, reasonably accepting
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Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2018 9:14 pm
·.·•✧•·.·•✧• •✧•·.·•✧•·.·The love is lost
Beauty and light
Have vanished from garden of delight •÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•Feeling torn apart after losing someone? For some reason those words resonated with Anselm but he couldn't understand why, perhaps it was his lack of memory but he honestly couldn't remember any time in his life that he felt that way. It was an odd sensation that he had felt before and one that only furthered to deepen his frustration. Why could he understand these feelings? What happened to him? What caused him to lose his memory? He wanted to know so desperately and yet he could never find a way to clear the haze in his mind. However before he could think any further on the matter Lokeah pulled him back to reality once more when he responded to the warning Anselm had given him about St. Vier. Though Lokeah's next words are what left Anselm utterly stunned, was Lokeah trying to help him? Anselm didn't understand, didn't Lokeah hate him? Fear him even? He was so confused but at the same time what was said left him thinking once more. What mattered was who he was now huh? Honestly Anselm didn't even know that at this point, his emotions were all over the place currently that he couldn't quite grasp who he actually was. At that thought Anselm finally spoke up after being silent for a moment, "Who I am now? Honestly I have no idea who I am now either, I'm just a slave after all, my identity is the one given to me isn't it? Yet at the same time I feel like whoever I was is important to who I am now. I want to know the memories I have lost so I can learn who I was then so I can create who I am now if that makes any sense. I want the identity I feel I lost back but at the same time I'm scared of it. I worry that I was this horrible monster yet I look at my actions now and I feel that who I used to be couldn't possibly worse than who I am now. I'm not called the angel of darkness for no reason after all, I've hurt so many people and will probably have to keep hurting them. I've come to accept that fate though, everything happens for a reason after all. Even now what little I do remember of my past is that whatever happened it wasn't the greatest life, I feel like I've felt pain and hatred even then. I feel like I don't belong anywhere really except maybe in this haven since it's all I clearly remember, but who knows really, I don't and maybe I never will. In the end though I guess my fate is pretty much sealed and it doesn't really matter who I am anymore huh?"•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•The dreams are gone
Midnight has come
The darkness is our new kingdom Find me if you wish: Cell 16Let's move on: LokeahNothing fancy: outfit in picturesSuccumb to the sounds: nothing at the moment
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Posted: Sat Sep 08, 2018 8:27 am
«Lokeah»
Captured||Trickster God||Wanna Play?
________________________________________
____________________________________
Lokeah shook his head at the response. It wasn’t at all like Asher, and it wasn’t at all the willingness to look at one’s situation from a better perspective like he would have hoped. He took in the other’s words before a frown came to his face. “Looks like yer a boring slave with a confusing personality if ya ask me.” Lokeah mumbled and crossed his arms, causing the blanket to shift. “Yer just gonna be stuck being something ya don’t like with that kinda attitude.” At least, that was his opinion.
It was hard to tell if that was what Anselm really wanted and if he was truly content with just giving in to the will of the unpredictable male that they would both consider to be their master. All Lokeah knew, was that his friend who was a god of war and death didn’t seem to have a difficult time changing who he was. At least to some extent… but maybe that was also why he died.
“You’re… weak.” He said, and perhaps that would provoke unpleasant feelings between the two, but it was really what the god thought. Someone who was so willing to give in to a life of slavery was weak. In all honesty, he felt himself to be pretty darn weak after giving in from the simple break of a finger. A finger that had recovered exponentially over the short time since he had left St.Vier’s room, and the swelling had just about vanished.
Then the god sighed and leaned back until he felt the surface of the cold wall. “Just because someone owns ya, don’t mean you can’t have your own identity. You’re acting different than when he was commanding ya… aren’t you?” Lokeah said. He knew that it was a bit harsh to call someone weak and just leave it at that. The harshness, or perhaps displeasure, in his voice faded again as he spoke and it became more of a sympathetic tone. It was already clear that Anselm was in no better place than himself, but now the conflicted nature of the other male was coming to light. “Still, it’s useless to linger on a past you can’t even remember, despite striving to be that person again. Just be your own ******** person now and figure out the rest if you remember.”
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________________________________________
Who are you?: Anselm
Where: Room 16
Mood:exhausted, irritated, oddly sympathetic
OOC:I hope it's alright ; v ;!!
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Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2018 8:44 pm
·.·•✧•·.·•✧• •✧•·.·•✧•·.·The love is lost
Beauty and light
Have vanished from garden of delight •÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•Lokeah's mumbled words did not escape from Anselm, however he made no comment to them since even he was confused by his own nature at times. Anselm wasn't even sure what was going on with his own emotions, he never did understand them after all which is why he generally didn't show them. They were often conflicting and would get mixed up to a point where he couldn't separate them, it was ridiculous but so was his personality. Lokeah's observation after that was one Anselm already knew as well, if he didn't do anything he would forever be St. Vier's angel of darkness and he wasn't entirely sure if he wanted that. He felt anger when St. Vier was looked down on or injured, hatred even, yet he also didn't agree with St. Vier's own actions. Completely destroying a person's identity was cruel and hurtful, a hard thing to watch when Anselm himself knew how painful losing yourself was. The oddly familiar phrase uttered next however caused a completely different reaction in Anselm, anger and despair? Where did the despair come from? It wasn't like Anselm hadn't felt despair before but this was different, he felt helpless, disappointed, almost like he had let someone down. But who, who had he let down? Certainly not St. Vier, he was sure of that. His mother, a lover, or perhaps both? He couldn't remember and that was frustrating. However he was pulled from his thoughts once more and he took a deep breath to calm his rising anger with himself, getting control over the despair as well. He then looked at Lokeah and gave a soft chuckle at his words before speaking, "That's true I suppose, I guess I do tend to hide what is really going on in my head from St. Vier more than I cared to admit. I suppose that makes me one of the luckier ones, I was able to keep some will of my own unlike many of the others that have joined the haven. Yet I'm not sure if I would consider it lucky, I see what is going on around me and know there's nothing I can really do, so I remained silent and gave up on fighting a man I'm powerless against. However I'm not so sure that's the person I want to be and yet I still feel lost on what to do so I obsess over an identity I lost in hopes of erasing the coward I am now." That was it wasn't it, that's why he was so hung up on the finding out who he used to be. He was nothing but a coward who was too afraid to stand up against something that deep down he knew was wrong, a painful thing to admit and one he had tried to run from this whole time. However now that it was out in the open perhaps he can finally come to terms with it and over come it, or so he hoped. At that thought he stood up and gave a small smile to Lokeah as he continued, "You're far stronger than I, something I hate to admit but you're right. I can't wallow in self pity over something I can't change for the rest of eternity, it's utterly ridiculous and something I should've admitted to a long time ago. I have these powers for a reason and I also feel like there's a reason I've lost my memory as well, perhaps I forgot something important and this is fate's way of fixing that. I'm still gonna search for the key to my hidden past but I'll do what I can to make up for all I've done in the past at the same time. It will take some time and it won't be easy but I'll do what I can. I'm not expecting you to come to like me, in fact I don't blame you for hating me but thanks for opening my eyes trickster."•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•The dreams are gone
Midnight has come
The darkness is our new kingdom Find me if you wish: Cell 16Let's move on: LokeahNothing fancy: outfit in picturesSuccumb to the sounds: nothing at the moment
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Posted: Fri Sep 14, 2018 7:41 am
«Lokeah»
Captured||Trickster God||Wanna Play?
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The words from Anslem about his conflict of having kept pieces of himself during his time in Haven was interesting to Lokeah. It would start to spark reckless ideas, among those he'd already had, and he contemplated how how really wanted to address this. If anything, that's the state he wanted to keep himself. Someone who knew who they were despite being at the mercy of some other being.
"I'd consider something like that lucky." He said and brought his arms up behind his head, almost like a pillow in the position he sat in. The blanket would react and ripple down like a waterfall off his shoulders and down to his waist, revealing a now fully dressed Lokeah.
The edges of his mouth perked up slightly in something that could almost resemble a smile. "What would be the fun of having the freedom you have around here if you didn't have a soul left?" That was his very subtle way of saying Just think of the possibilities with that kind of power. Spoken any other way and heard could have been well, dangerous.
Up until this point Lokeah had found himself in a somewhat neutral mood, but the smallest mention of praise for being the type of person he was and the little nickname that followed caused him to waiver. "Heh, I don't think I'd be a very good god if I wasn't strong~" He said, and a little gleam came to his eye. "But I think the fact that you're willing to change for the better is strength in it's own way. Don't let go of that. A pretty little creature like you doesn't deserve to be caged up and sad."
That was perhaps unexpected, and in a way Lokeah didn't entirely know why he said something like that. He did have a lingering hatred in his heart for this man, but he also wanted to keep a beneficial relationship with him. What kind? Who knows. Just, anything that might lessen the future harm and provide him with needed opportunity. Yeah. That.
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Who are you?: Anselm
Where: Room 16
Mood:reckless, tired, confusing
OOC:...
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Posted: Fri Sep 21, 2018 11:19 pm
·.·•✧•·.·•✧• •✧•·.·•✧•·.·The love is lost
Beauty and light
Have vanished from garden of delight •÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•"I suppose to some it would seem lucky but for me it's an odd mix of feelings, I'm grateful that I kept some small portion of myself but at the same time I do occasionally regret having it since it makes me more aware of my surroundings. I see the other acolytes in endless pleasure, blissfully unaware of the horrors that lie just outside the doors of the haven and to a degree I envy them, wishing that I could be as unaware as them. Deep down I know that all of this will one day lead to a much better world but it can be hard to deal with at times, but such is life now I suppose," Anselm said as he crossed his arms, his eyes trained to the floor as he spoke. However he did look up at Lokeah's words about enjoying his freedom and a light chuckle escaped Anselm before he spoke once more, "True, if you put it that way I guess it's not all bad." At his last words Anselm's arms fell to his sides and the small smile returned to his features. He sensed the truth behind the words Lokeah spoke and as much as he hated to admit it was honestly starting to consider the possibilities but he kept that to himself for now. However Lokeah's response to his praise and the nickname he had given him without even thinking did amuse Anselm and his smile widened a little, oddly pleased with the reaction. However Lokeah's next words did render Anselm silent as surprise crossed his features before quickly vanishing and he soon looked away, unsure of how to react to the words spoken to him. Pretty? Well that was not something Anselm ever expected to hear from anyone, let alone Lokeah. It caused an odd feeling that Anselm didn't understand to well up, yet it was also a familiar feeling which only served to leave him with even more questions. What was going on? At that thought Anselm shook his head and turned his attention back to Lokeah, keeping his thoughts to himself as he spoke, "As flattering as that is I wouldn't exactly call myself pretty, at any rate I've been here far longer than I should have. You have given me quite a lot to think about trickster and for that I am somewhat grateful. However it's best I leave now, but before I do I must warn you. I can show you mercy when it's the two of us but in front of St. Vier and the others I can't, his word is law and if we go against it both of us will suffer. In front of him I will remain harsh and unwavering when it comes to his orders of me but I will do what I can to ease it when he is not around, that is all I can promise. Hate me if you must but know that I will forever be grateful for the words you spoke here today, with that I bid you farewell and hope that we can speak again sometime." At that Anselm left the cell, closing and locking the door behind him. Once the door was secure he stood by it for a few moments lost in thought before letting out a sigh and leaving the cells, wanting to go for a walk while he thought over everything that happened in the cell while he was talking to Lokeah.•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•÷±‡±±‡±÷•The dreams are gone
Midnight has come
The darkness is our new kingdom Find me if you wish: Cell 16Let's move on: LokeahNothing fancy: outfit in picturesSuccumb to the sounds: nothing at the moment
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Posted: Mon Oct 22, 2018 1:17 pm
«Lokeah»
Captured||Trickster God||Wanna Play?
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Lokeah sighed at the response and flopped backwards onto the matress. “Eh, you’re no fun. Yer still pretty if ya like it or not.” He mumbled. It was frustrating to him to listen to all the rejections of what he thought were positive words towards the other. He expected a cuter response than “I wouldn’t exactly call myself pretty.” But what was a captive boy to do. He could have almost blamed himself for Anselm leaving so abruptly after that statement, but he didn’t actually care now.
“Bye~” Lokeah said simply as the door closed with a metallic clang and the gravity of his situation began to close in on him again. The room never grew quiet, he never expected it to but he really wished it would. He could hear the cries and odd noises that were conjured up by the other slave that were kept down the hall within small cells like his or the large holding room he’d been in before.
Between that and the general stress he’d conjured up, there was no use trying to sleep.
He was alone in his own thoughts now… in a little boring box. “I… I hate this.” He cried. The walls felt tight around him and his chest began to tighten again as a sob choked out from his lips. Lokeah rolled over squeezed the blanket into his chest. He’d never felt so hopeless and trapped in his life and everything about it terrified the young god. He could fake being strong, but the truth was that he really wasn’t.
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Who are you?: No one now.
Where: Room 16
Mood:upset, tired
OOC:Only tagging ya since Anslem is there for the last bit of the post~
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