As a parent who has been in a.. semi-similar situation, I can understand what it's like being the sole provider for children while the spouse works, and then having that flipped. You really do kind of obnoxiously worry that they can handle it, even though they're the other parent, and for all intents and purposes THEY KNOW THE KID. When I went to work, I triple checked that my husband knew routine ect. So on that I understand, but you're right, the kids spent so much of the first movie 'proving' themselves, and then any trust they seemed to have earned got forgotten.
I really don't understand the purpose of wiping Violet's almost bf's memory. He proved that he wasn't going to tell anybody about her, and after a talk, he probably would've understood. And even if they had dated he would've found out she was an Incredible anyway. Or they would've broken up because she was hiding something("oh no, sorry I have to leave in the middle of this date to..... Help my mom?")
And we already saw Violet get quite a bit of character development in the first movie, so why not Dash instead of her. Disney all but told us Jackjack would have powers, so we expected that, even he gets more development than Dash.
Having Both of them be behind it would've made it a much better movie in general. It's something Disney, to my knowledge hasn't done much of, and it caters more towards the now adults that have waited for this movie to come out. Plus the cop out of "_____ got my parents killed, so revenge" theme is so overdone by now, that that's what it was, a cop out. And the sister's excuse for the brother, 'he's just a damaged child'. And I want to know more about why she's ethnic, while the brother and parents seemed white. Was she adopted, or.... She could've even been Frozone's baby from when he was a teenager, SOMETHING.