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Peter piggybacked Polly all the way back to their house. He had never really noticed how serene nature was since he left. He wondered if anything drastic had happened in his absence. Had anyone died or had the Peacekeepers become stricter like they did in one. He had been gone for 3 years. But yet it seemed a lot longer then that. His father had been gone too. But he was never coming back. He didn't even have anything for the world to remember him by out in the forest. Peter had taken his wallet and his other belongings....he needed to to survive. If his father had them then they wouldn't be of any more use to his father to pay honest. How was he supposed to buy food when he was dead?

They rounded the house. It didn't look much different. Still small, but perfect in an un perfect way. "Were here." he told Polly quietly, taking her off his shoulders and placing her on the ground gently. The woods were not very far away from there house luckily. He was surprisingly not tried from carrying that 15 year old girl, who was his sister. He knocked on the door to see that it wasn't locked. As soon as his fingers brushed against the wood the door swung open almost eerily.

He walked in, clutching Polly's hand. The house smelled...like wood...burning wood. It smelled like home. Home sweet home. It was good to be back. He gulped, and in a loud but not obnoxious voice he said. "Susa-...Mom. I'm back."

The 18 year old gave looked around. He was a little shocked to see his sister their clutching his arm like a security blanket. He rubbed her shoulder with a smile. It was really really good to be home again. To see his family smiling instead of crying. He hated crying. It was soo awful and salty. Even happy tears. It all.....bugged him. Sadness in general bothered him. Why be sad when you could be happy. He didn't cry a lot. he only cried when he absolutely couldn't stand it any longer.

He smiled when his mother brought up celebration. At least she didn't ask about Dad. That would have been hard for him to explain. She shook his head when his mother headed out of the kitchen and brought in a slice of cake. "Oh mom, you really didn't need to do all this for me. Really..." He said releasing his mother's hand and patted Polly'd head. He let his hand back down as his mother held it tightly again.

God, he couldn't talk about it. He changed the subject before it got in depth. He didn't want to talk about it. He smiled. "Missed you too mom." He smiled. "Uhmm...not to be rude but...Are you and Jarod..dating? Like I have never seen him before."

Peter looked at Polly. She looked so peaceful and serene. It was a nice look for her. It greatly added on to cute angelic personality. Peter stroked his little sister's blonde head until she fell asleep. She was just as cute as he remembered. he smiled as dropped his hand from the top of her head and looked at his mother. So they WERE dating. he could tell. He tried to hide his disdain with a smile. A weak smile.

Suddenly his mom brought up "the issue" again. he really didn;t want to talk about it. But he knew he had to at some point. But he drew in a breath and grabbed onto his mothers hand. he looked her in the eyes and began to speak. "That day we went missing, me and dad...there was an accident. I blame myself every single day." He closed his eyes and a sole tear streamed down his cheek. He spoke in a shaky way, his whisper a hoarse whisper. "He died because of me. I went to go pick up my compass I dropped by a tree...and...and...the tree fell down." He drew in another large breath and continued. "He used his life to save...m-mine. He pushed me out of the way and the....tree crushed him."

He said that last part more quietly. "I couldn't face it...your faces, Polly's. I couldn't come home knowing..know it was all my fault." He felt tears streaming out of his eyes. "So I ran...I left...to District 1. I got a job there....started all over. I just hoped that you all would never learn the truth and forget about me. But I felt like I was eing childish...and I owed you all at least an apology before I leave back to one for good."

The almost man embraced his sobbing mother, trying to stop the flow of tears from his eyes. He didn't want to look weak in front of his mother. He was supposed to be the strong one who kept his family alive and well and protected them from anything. But he felt like he kind of failed them after the whole thing with his father's death. He knew that his own death would be less painful on the family. They would cry and sob..but they would get over it. His father's death was much...much harder to deal with.

"Susan...mom...you don't understand. It was my fault...it was. If I wasn't stupid enough to go back and get that compass he would be alive and breathing right now." He shook his head letting his hair cover his eyes. He didn't want his mother to see him like this. He thought this over. Stay...here? Impossible. He did have a life back in one. Lots of friends and people he cared about...a little job. But his family. They were more important. "Fine. I guess I will stay here." He said avoiding her gaze as he said it, because he wasn't exactly sure.

He patted her back softly in a rhythmic way trying to soothe her and make the troubles leave. He only hoped she wasn't mad...that she didn't hate him. He heard the couch moving and figured it must be little Polly.

The boy looked over to see Polly had awoken from her nap. He gave his mother one more tight squeeze before letting go. He didn't want o kill his poor mother with love. He already killed his father. How could he cope with such pain? He murdered him quite frankly. He metaphorically killed his father. It was no one's fault but his own. Also it was the tree's fault. Peter tried to think of anything he might have done to cause this. He had a whole list he would never share with anyone. He would NEVER live it down. John was killed becuase of his own stupidity. His father gave HIS life in order to keep Peter's secure. That was more then he could have ever asked for. Some one who would die for him. But it hurt. When his father left, it was as if a part of his heart was ripped out and dissapeered forever.

He snapped out of his trance and smiled at Polly. "Mom's fine..She just got some dust in her eye." He said. Peter was a good liar. He learned everything he did from district one. He grinned at the feeling of his little sister on his shoulder. He wrapped a protective arm around her, holding her tight, away from the dangers the world had to offer. The frown returned at Polly's last sentence. Leave again...and cause his family such heartache. Never. "I won't. I promise I'll never leave you alone again, as long as I am still standing and breathing I refuse to leave just to make sure nothing happens to you and Mommy, Polyvon."

He tightened his grip around his sister. He remembered this very moment. Except dad was here too. They were all huddled around this place. Cozy and warm, Safe in the little house of theirs. It was his father himself who helped build this very house. It was built before he was born, but he remembered his father telling him all about the different kinds of wood and all the time it took. But it was worth it. The house was small but it was definitely good enough for all of them. "Man. I missed this place."

His face broke into a simple smile when Polly's hums echoes around the small space. Big brothers home...Big brothers home. He hid his emotions under a mask of a blank face. But in his head a million things were going off. How he managed the strength to leave then come back. It broke him down and then built him back up. He heard his mother's whisper as Polly hummed on. His reply was simple; "I'll find a way, mom.". He said it soft enough Polly couldn't hear. She's been through to much,

When he heard his little sister hum another farmillar tune, some thing clicked in his mind. He hummed along. "You have a lovely voice Polyvon." He replied when she was finished.