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 Posted: Wed Jan 18, 2006 7:35 pm
Da_Nuke SyphaBelnades Quantact I think you should start a conversation with her. Ask how she and her boyfriend are doing. If she tells you they're done and doesn't seem hesitant, just wait a week and ask her out then. If she seems uncomfortable talking to you about the matter, that is a sign on her part that she's worried about you asking her out again. Clearly, in that case you should not go for it. Well, from the way her xanga was written, I'd say she's ready for another relationship. I mean, she actually said she was looking for a date to the dance. Then WTF are you waiting for? Ask her to go dance with you. Chances are she'll say OK. You can do it! Your oversimplifying it, I can't ask her to the dance, its invite-only. Besides, I don't think I'm supposed to know she broke up with her boyfriend.
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Posted: Thu Jan 19, 2006 4:31 am
Mreow, you could say that you wish someone would ask you to the dance, because you'd rather not go alone. Technically, you are not asking her, you are merely implying that you would like to go with someone.
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Posted: Thu Jan 19, 2006 8:35 pm
KageShujin Mreow, you could say that you wish someone would ask you to the dance, because you'd rather not go alone. Technically, you are not asking her, you are merely implying that you would like to go with someone. Actually, I asked her about the dance yesterday. I think I kind of gave the idea that I was interested in going, but she didn't invite me. I was going to say something like "I suppose your going with your boyfriend" but I never got the chance to. I emailed her two days ago, asking if she had a xanga, but she hasn't responded yet. That's a good idea, but I don't think I wanna press the dance too much now. Actually, I don't really know what to do next. I don't know, you still think I should try that?
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Posted: Wed Feb 22, 2006 7:08 pm
Update: Well, that went badly. Recently she sent me an email politely asking me to stop pursuing her. She was really nice about it, she even thanked me for the candy I gave her for Valentine's day. She said she didn't mind running into me every once in a while, but that I was making her uncomfortable by talking to her too much. That was a week ago, and I haven't talked to her since then. I'm not really sure what to do, I still want to be friends with her at the very least. By the way, she said I was being stalker-ish.
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Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2006 5:16 am
well this situation is painfully familiar. Trust me if you want her as a friend you may already blown it, and at this point anything you do might just make it worse. I hate to say it but when a girl even has the slightest inclanation that your stalking her, back away. Its hard but you need to avoid thinking about her, the best thing to do is find another girl and move on with your life. Then (in theroy anyway) you could face this girl again. This isn't an easy thing to do it can bring depression and lonleyness, but you have to back away before you become obsessive. good luck.
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Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2006 6:26 am
SyphaBelnades By the way, she said I was being stalker-ish If she said that then leave her be for a long while (I am talking months) She is really feeling uncomfortable. Give her her space, be friendly if you meet by chance and see how things go. This old expression really holds true, "If you love something let it go, if it comes back it is your if not it never was." This applies to humans too, althought they are not posessions. I have had to do this with friends and others over the years, and it was the only way I managed to maintain a freindship with an old boyfriend for over 20 years! Trust me please, let her go.
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Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2006 6:01 pm
Krystlanna SyphaBelnades By the way, she said I was being stalker-ish If she said that then leave her be for a long while (I am talking months) She is really feeling uncomfortable. Give her her space, be friendly if you meet by chance and see how things go. This old expression really holds true, "If you love something let it go, if it comes back it is your if not it never was." This applies to humans too, althought they are not posessions. I have had to do this with friends and others over the years, and it was the only way I managed to maintain a freindship with an old boyfriend for over 20 years! Trust me please, let her go. If I wait too long I won't be able to see her before I graduate. And then it'll probably over a year before I get a chance to see her again (if I get to see her again). @Seigest: I suppose your right. But I can't just stop having feelings for her. Finding someone else won't be easy, but I guess I can never be with her.
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2006 3:26 pm
I went through the same thing with my gf. I did something similar, except that I checked when she posted by using the journal calendar and notices when she posted something that's not visible to me. She knows I do this, and have commented that I'm stalkerish as well.
I liked her a lot, and yes, I'll admit that I was too pushy and annoying by messaging her every single time she goes online and asking her to go to places with me every week. Now that I think about it, we aren't really meant for each other. She obviously didn't like me as much as I liked her, and y'know, love can't be forced.
It still hurts, but I'm glad it's over between me and her. Like you, I still want to be friends with her, but if she had already developed annoyance with you, it's best to let things cool. Give her space, and let her approach you when she wants to.
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