►►► WHY HELLO THERE, I'M....
Hayleigh Marie Parker...but you Darlin', can call me Hails.
►►► WHICH RESTROOM DO YOU USE?
Obviously the one with the picture of the stick figure in a dress! I'm of the female species! Though sometimes I do wonder what like would be like if I woke up one morning as a male.
Oh gosh it sounds like Freaky Friday..but less mom and daughter and more gender swapping. I would make a pretty sexy guy, don't ya think?
►►► GAWD PUT AWAY THAT CALCULATOR! I AM NOT A DINOSAUR!
I'm only 16. Mommy and Daddy threw me a HUGE sweet sixteen party with elephants and everything!
I arrived in a bright red helicopter wearing a mini-dress! And man, did that wow the paparazzi!
Gee, who would have known that blowing out 16 candles could be so...difficult?
►►► I AM SWEET, FRUITY AND ENTERTAINING! DON'T YOU FORGET IT!
Oh gee. I didn't see you. Just how long have you been standing there? Well I don't care if the door was open! You should have knocked. Pfft....Excuse me? Can you repeat your question? There was this butterfly I saw out the window and well...I got distracted. But gee, it was just so PRETTY...like me! Oh I should probably mention that I have a short attention span. So if your one of those people that likes to tell people a really long story about your cat Mr. Mittens...I am not the person to hear it.You call it mean..I call it...gee sorry what were we talking about again? Well...I guess it doesn't matter. Anyways, I am pretty much your eternal optimist. Why look at the bad parts of life when there are so many good parts (especially me) ? I like to think of life like a lollipop. It's amazing and flavorful while it lasts and it slowly gets smaller and smaller until...BAMF it's gone. And even when it's gone, at least it was tasty right?
Being the daughter of famous tv news reporters turned television personalities is pretty great. Living in a mansion with a team of maids who leave those scrumptious little pillow chocolate thingies under your pillow? Gee, I never understood how they managed to put those under my pillow while I am sleeping with me waking up. My mom used to say it was the "pillow chocolate fairy" but I still not sure. Well I can be pretty angry and mean when I want to be. Not that I choose to be angry or anything....it just happens. It's like I have all this "happy juice" flowing out of me and then some random jacka** just goes and pisses all over it. NOT. COOL. Pfft...I'll just have daddy file a lawsuit against them. That'll shut them up.
I hate the way everyone stereotypes me. Just 'cause I am rich and super pretty doesn't mean I am stupid. They don't appeciate my in-jell-a-ten. Oh wait I meant...Intelligence!! Yeah, that's what I meant. Like this one time the dryer stopped working and my Jeans were still wet from the washers so I put them in the microwave and dried them there. I think it was a great idea! The world just isn't ready to process my awesomeness yet. Also I am not a narcissistic. I am just saying the truth I mean. I don't know one person in this whole world who could look me in the looking holes and tell me that I am not pretty. Because....it's just not true. Plus I have won a ton of beauty pageants before. I have the crowns to prove it! I guess being the daughter of America's Cutest Talk-Show Couple does win over a few people..(Hayleigh is more of a ditz then I make her sound trust me xD
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after he always used it.
