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Tags: teens, puberty, sexuality, pregnancy, life issues 

Reply Miscarriage & Abortion Subforum
Letting go?

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Mighty Selkie_girl

PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 5:03 pm


Im 16 years old. I was raped this summer. I got pregnant and miscarried at 5wks. I named her Carla. On 12/5/09 i would be 5 months pregnant. But i cant seem to let go of her.

My girlfriend blew up at me today and reminded me that it has been 5 months and i should let go already and forget about it. But i dont know how, and i know she doesnt wanna hear about it anymore. But she is all i think about all day.

Also, i see a therapist and she knows and im on anti depressants and all that, but idk why I cant get my baby girl off my mind. Shouldnt i be moving on?
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 5:14 pm


girlfriend?????!!!!!!!!O_o

anyways it depends on what knd of person u are some wont move on on some things that easily

and r**ed????? whats ur definition is it legal o.o

kristinah321


LorienLlewellyn

Quotable Informer

PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 6:03 pm


It can take time to move on. Everyone goes at a different pace. Five months actually isn't all that long when it comes to something that traumatic. The first year is the hardest for most people.

Try to stay positive. It's not your fault that you lost the baby. It happens. Even though it won't replace the one you lost, you can have another baby in the future. And you can love that baby enough for two. And when you're older you'll be in a better position to take care of a baby in terms of money, education, having your own place, all the things that a baby needs and deserves.

It's great that you are seeing a therapist. You might want to look into a rape or miscarriage support group as well. Support groups are often a great outlet because the people there understand exactly what you're going through and won't make you feel weird about needing some help dealing with it.
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 8:02 pm


I completely agree with Lorien. 5 months is not an abnormal grieving length at all, especially when children are involved.

!namorata


Nikolita
Captain

PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2009 8:53 pm


There's another girl in this subforum who had a miscarriage awhile back and she still mourns her son. She might be a good person to talk to, I think she has a thread in here... ah, here we go: http://www.gaiaonline.com/guilds/viewtopic.php?t=6551809

You could also make a tribute, something to look at that will help you remember your baby. A signature for Gaia, a picture, a story, a drawing, something of your own creation.

As Lorien said, you can have another in the future and love that baby enough for two. There's no rush to move on - grieving is a natural process and it takes however long it takes. Congrats on seeing a therapist, that's a really good move on your part. smile Lorien's suggestion of support groups might be worth looking into too if you want some extra support.
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Miscarriage & Abortion Subforum

 
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