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 Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2005 8:01 pm
{Intro}
"If you should go skating
on the thin ice of modern life,
dragging behind you the silent reproach
of a million tear-stained eyes,
don't be surprised when a crack in the ice
appears under your feet.
You slip out of your depth,
and out of your mind,
with your fear flowing out behind you
as you claw at the thin ice."
-Pink Floyd, "The Thin Ice"
I'm barely hanging on but I know I can't let go. These cracks inside of me keep getting deeper and harder to hide...they get bigger and bigger and some day I worry they're gonna swallow me up...jus' like they do in my dreams. So I gotta hang on, hang on to what I have left-- myself. If I lose myself...then there'll be nothing left.
Papa once asked me who I thought I was. I...told him over and over I was a wolf; I was Mabon, Papa, isn't it obvious? But that wasn't what he meant. I'm not sure....what exactly he meant, but I know it wasn't what I thought. Who am I? Now...I'm a scarred little scrap of fur. I want to be more than that...but how? I'm a worthless imbecile who can't even hunt right. I'll just drag down whoever I'm with.
Who could want me?
Sometimes I close my eyes, lay down on the ground at night and pretend that none of this ever happened, that I was still at home in my den wih the rest of my littermates and Mama. In dreams, we lose all our heartaches. But you can close your eyes to reality, but not to memories. These wounds...they're souvineirs I'll never lose. Just how damaged have I become?
Nothing I ever did was good enough...
Nothing I'll ever do will be good enough.
For me...there's just no hope
~*~Prove to me you're not like the others~*~
-Mabon
[Welcome to Mabon's journal. This is where all information about the scarred little scrap of fur shall be stored, along with RP logs and a few....auxillary entries.
Table O' Contents
post 1- Introduction
post 2- Story
post 3- About Mabon
post 4- Events
post 5- Photo Album
post 6- Friends, Family and Enemies
post 7- Pack info
post 8- Just in case.../Miscellanious uses
post 9+- RP logs, entries
Please note this is a PRIVATE Journal, meaning no one but myself, the owners of the Shaoilin Wolves shop, and a rare few I may give permission to.
Also, this journal is under heavy construction at the moment, so do forgive the general lack of information and untidiness.
Thank you.
-Koko]
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Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2005 8:07 pm
{Mabon's Story}
[under construction. Please check back later.]
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Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2005 8:32 pm
{About...}
Mabon is currently: A puppy
Name: Mabon
Pack: none, as of yet
History: Mabon was born with partialy albinism. Though his fur and skin and pretty much everything else is fine, he lacks pigment in his eyes-- hence why they are red. Due to this, Mabon has poor eyesight and was thrown out of his pack by his own father, who saw him as little more than a hinderance. His father burtally attacked him, leaving scars scatter across one side of the young wolf, though the older wolf left more scars that weren't seen... Mabon wandered from his packland for days, scared, alone, hungry, and full of distrust and sorrow. He stumbled across the Shaoilin woods, hoping deep down that maybe here he could be accepted...
Personality: Due to his past expirience, Mabon is highly skiddish, uneasy, and distrustful around new wolves. He tends to distance himself, staying aloof and building a 'wall', so to speak, so he won't be hurt if he is again betrayed. however, deep down, he struggles against this, wanting to just be accepted and cared for.
Appearance: Mabon has a base coat that's a soft reddish-brown color, with a little white bib that runs from his neck down his chest to a little bit past his forearms. He has little white socks on his back paws, and a long black sock on one of his front paws. His other forepaw is the same basic color of his body, though one toe on the outside is completely black. His ears are black and edged with white, and he has odd markings on his face, as well as his tail. He has a long black striped that goes all the way down his spine to the base of his tail, where it meets with a ring at the tail's base. Crossing the spinal line horizontally are four small stripes. Mabon is a beautiful wolf, despite his scars.
[still under construction]
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Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2005 8:35 pm
{Events}
none, as of yet...
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Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2005 8:41 pm
{Photo Album}
[under construction]
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Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2005 8:42 pm
{Family, Friends, and Enemies}
Family
Samhain: Mabon's father. From outside the Shaoilin Woods. Samhain grew up as a lone wolf for most of his life, occasionally banding up with other loners here and there for survival. he lived a harsh life, and has many scars to prove it. He's gruff, impersonal, and quite aloof-- those that don't know him well would say he's a total sociopathic jerk. Which, in all truth, he really is. He thinks of what is best for his pack, and doesn't care much for individuals-- which in the long run IS good for survival but still...kinda mean. He is the alpha of his pack back home, and the one who drove Mabon away and gave the young wolf his scars.
Ostara: Mabon's mother. From outside the Woods. Ostara always grew up with the comfort of a pack and other wolves around her. She is certainly more caring and sensitive to individual needs than her mate, Samhain, is. She became said wolf's mate when he joined her pack-- albeit shakily--and she befriended him. Aw. She apparently sees something in Samhain that no one else does, and tolerates his bitchiness most of the time, though this time, after he ran his own son out of the pack...she may not be to accepting...
Beltane: Mabon's littermate (brother). From Outisde the Woods. Beltane is the more laid-back of the litter, and already shows good leadership qualities, even at a young age. He was always looking out for and defending Mabon before he was exiled, and it can be now assumed that he looks after his sister and other brother now.
Imbolc: Mabon's littermate (brother). From Outside the Woods. The more enegertic and hyper of the group. He's always bouncing around, though he can get really quiet, which throws others off. He isn't too bright, but he's a good hunter and a better friend. He was very upset that his brother (and best playmate) 'left'. Despite the fact that he's the same age as Beltane, he looks up to his brother quite a bit.
Lamas: Mabon's littermate (sister). From Outisde the Woods. Smart and playful all in one package. Probably the most optimistic of the litter, and by far one of the most outgoing. She tends to look for the bright side in every situation and if she can't find one...she cries. She cared for Mabon quite a bit, and whent he was chased away, she developed a strong grudge towards her father for chasing him out, and one towards her mother for allowing this.
Friends:
Unknown Wolf: A passerby. From Outside the Woods. While Mabon was traveling to the Shaoilin woods, after he had been chased from his homeland, he encountered a strange, albino wolf. He was blind in one eye and had nasty scars all over his face...he had torn ears, and half his tail was gone. But despite his scary looks, when he found Mabon exhausted from running, he cared for the little wolf pup until her was ready to move on. It's unknown if the starnge albino belonged to a pack or not; Mabon left before he found much out about this guy...
Enemies:
Thus far, Mabon does not have any enemies.
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Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2005 8:43 pm
{Pack Info}
Mabon belongs to no pack as of yet
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Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2005 8:47 pm
-Reserved...Just in case-
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