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 Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2005 9:55 am
William Black Romuel Keptan By the way, what's the significance of calling it "John 1"? W00t, I love being right. heart That's what I thought, too. eek I ACTUALLY GOT THE REFERENCE! *dancedance* I kneeew something, I kneeeew something heart
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Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2005 12:39 pm
Lavishly done, and with good subtle references.
I need to get some time, sit down, and read Gendou's whole original, I was under the impression that this was a spinn-off story from his?
Having everything in context would let me better understand the story.... and therefore, let me make more enlightened commentary.
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Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2005 1:28 pm
Interesting. Presently, the language is holds my attention the most: metaphor and simile FTW. The plot's obviously going somewhere, though I can't figure any guesses out yet.
The combos are fun: at first I thought you were making Grayed force Rommy's attention onto the vital points of each soldier, but having them forced to look at her instead was equally cool.
The use of Jillian as what I perceive to be a metaphor for using a WoMD, given Rommy's personal reaction to John 1, and the effective, "bad," of using her works really nicely.
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Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2005 6:41 pm
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Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2005 6:49 pm
Thanks for readinig, dear. It's just what I saw when I read your stuff.
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Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2005 7:11 pm
... <3 Thank you for the lovely story, Romuel. Your writing skills are lovely.
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Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2005 7:28 pm
Wow. Just... wow.
I'm in awe, Rommy.
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Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2005 8:19 pm
*cough*
Details -are- appreciated.
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Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 6:27 am
Wow. I owe you a full review on this, though I'd rather do it via PM. heart Awesome visuals, Rowan. heart I've been honored by Whiteout's inclusion.
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Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 10:46 am
Romuel I was planning on doing short pieces in which the students have to face situations where their powers are a liability. I'm thinking of calling it 'Room 101'. That sounds really cool. YOU MUST WRITE THEM. If you don't write them, I'll have the combined forces of the Order of the Doll after you. Me and Kyraa could...er...make sad faces. And wiggle our cute doll ears. gonk
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Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 11:46 am
Moryera That sounds really cool. YOU MUST WRITE THEM. If you don't write them, I'll have the combined forces of the Order of the Doll after you. Me and Kyraa could...er...make sad faces. And wiggle our cute doll ears. gonk *giggle* Well, read Vignette.
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Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 1:08 pm
When I said I wanted more, that's what I was talking about. ;3
On a whole different note, I'm also curious about what the teachers did during their early days... *nudge nudge* ninja heart
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Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 2:07 pm
Great story, impressive visuals, and a lot of references which fit very well in with the story. I loved how you subtly hinted at what the last line of the story revealed.
Overall, impressive work. I look forward to more, if you happen to find the time to make side stories. 3nodding heart
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Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 2:52 pm
A great conclusion. It makes sense that Jillian would learn sign language to overcome the barrier of communication. I enjoyed the contrast between Rowan, the elder with more experience and seemingly a much larger view of the world; and Jillian, who is closer to an innocent. I wonder if this is their first field mission...
And the Biblical metaphors that appear throughout the story are quite fitting if my little bit of research can tell me anything, such as comparisons to the archangel Gabriel and to Gomorrah. And I wonder if the Michael mentioned could be interpreted to either be Michael Levesque or the archangel Michael. But I won't go into that since it's unfamiliar territory to me and I could be completely wrong. sweatdrop
All in all, I really enjoyed reading this. I hope you decide to keep on writing. 3nodding heart
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Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 3:30 pm
I loved how even though Jillian never talked, you could tell what she was saying. You are so good at the implied, Romuel. 3nodding
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