Chocobo Tales: Jade Regent

[Kombinant]

Damage 1d6+2  

[Cowpies77]

Chad-for-short kinda paces back and forth a little, the cramped room not allowing him to enter into the fray.

Davros, clearly not amused, reaches out and grabs the goblin chief, roaring in defiance of the goblin's struggles. Gutwad tries to stab at Davros, but is stuck by the volume of Orc muscle.

The remaining goblin is still stuck in the corner, waving the sparkler rather timidly now. It lets out a small burst of lights that Ryoga kinda just bats away without much effort.  

[Kombinant]

Ryouga smirks a bit at the goblin's timid display batting it way with one fist and delivering a backhand to the goblin with the other.

Melee Attack +2  

[Cowpies77]

Chad-for-short, looking over the scene, calls out "Oy, think you wanna toss dog-meat over here? I wanna crack at him too, big guy!"
Davros, looking behind as Gutwad continues to thrash and attempt to wiggle free, says "Gimme a mo...!" Taking a step back, he tosses Gutwad into the wall, behind Ryoga. Chad-for-short takes a small side step (establishing flanking) and lets loose a battle squawk as he swings with the blade.

Gutwad tries to evade it, but backs up into Ryoga's legs. He instinctively pulls back from the monk, but quickly realizes that Chad-for-Short's (relatively) massive sword isn't allowing for any mistakes. The blade splits straight through Gutwad's gut, spilling his innards onto the floor as the goblin drops to his knees, dropping his dogslicer and trying to hold his belly together in vain. Looking up at Chad-for-Short, the Goblin gurgles something before his eyes roll back and he falls forward in a pile of his own mess.

The last goblin has completely lost the will to fight, opting to instead tossing the sparkler to the ground, turning around and trying to flee through the "Secret" escape hatch (Ryoga can get an AoO if you want)  

[Kombinant]

Ryouga sees the goblin try to make good his escape and decides that it will instead meet his fist. Letting out a bit of frustration at slippery Goblins and poorly thrown punches, Ryouga hits the fleeing goblin with a haymaker.

AoO: Melee Attack +2  

[Kombinant]

1d6+2 damage  

[Cowpies77]

The goblin tries to flee, but a boot to the head sends the goblin slamming against the wall and slumping over, leaving a red, bloody trail as it slowly bleeds out.

"Well, that was... colorful." Chad-for-Short says, wiping down his sword. Walking over, he searches quickly for, picks up and bottles some of Gutwad's teeth that Davros punched out, saying "It's for my Momento Necklace. It's how I remember all my stories." Pulling out his dagger, he says "Sooooo... I'm guessing you lot will want me cutting off their ears now? Uh... think there's any reward for... y'know... offing the Chief here?"

Pausing for a moment, Chad-for-Short ties up the dying goblin that Ryoga nearly murdered and channels another healing burst (Ryoga and Davros should both be back up to full HP now). Ryoga opens his mouth to object, but Chad-for-short says "I figure we could find out what the hell happened here, then let him go where ever. It's not like a single injured and unarmed goblin's gonna do much damage anywhere, right? You can take it out of my share of the bounty."

Davros, still visibly angry, kicks open the side door, shouting something in Orcish.

"Riiiight." Turning to Ryoga, Chad-for-short says "He said 'I'm gonna twist their heads off if there's any more of these little'... hmm... I'm not sure there's a proper word for that in common. It's like... an Land-Zit." Shrugging, Chad-for-Short goes back to cutting off goblin bits (occasionally stabbing some that aren't quite dead yet due to his healing pulse) as Davros rampages like a bull in a china shop in what looks to be a bedroom for the Goblin Chief, tearing apart flimsy makeshift furniture while Ryoga quickly snuffs out the sparklers before they fire off again. Opting not to bother Davros while he's in a mood, Ryoga goes to collect the various loot from the corpses.

The goblins that all died as part of the initial ambush all have a blue wooden tube with white star patterns on them (three total), 1 dogslicer blade each (for 6 total), small shields and leather armor again (5 total).

Gutwad seems to have been keeping the nicer stuff for himself, as Chad-for-Short offers up two more Red wooden tubes with gold double-stripe patterns on them. Chad-for-Short also gives Gutwad's gear the once over, sifting through the chief's things.

"Garbage... garbage... garbage... Normal spear... Ooh, masterwork composite longbow. That's a keeper. We could sell that for nearly 200 gold." Stopping as he roots through the quiver, Chad-for-Short says "Normal, normal, Magic, normal, Magic, magic, normal, magic, normal, magic, normal." Then, uninterested, passes it to Ryoga as he moves on to the vial and sniffs it. ""Oh, that's magic. Smells of almonds and vanilla... milky pinkish hue... slightly sour taste... healing potion. And this Chain shirt is masterwork too. That could get a decent copper. Another healing potion... and-" (opening up a pouch) ""10...20...30... 32 gold."

He turns to Ryoga and opens his beak to say something else, but Davros punches a hole through the wall behind the throne, and the Tengu just lets out a girly, high-pitched screech of terror.
"Shut your poverty-hole and get in here. There's stuff I might regret breaking later otherwise."

Chad-for-Short and Ryoga exchange confused glances before moving through the bedroom and into the (repurposed closet) "treasure room". Inside is a rather beautiful red-painted chest. While it shows signs of neglect, Chad-for-Shorts eyes widen a bit as he and Ryoga both let out an "Oooooooooh~"

"So, how much you think it's worth?"
Chad-for-Short kneels down and hugs the chest, rubbing his face against it lovingly. "Assuming we clean off the crap and whatever this is? Maybe add on a bit of polish? Let's see what we got-"

"You're drooling."

"I have drool, but no shame. Anyway, Cherry wood, expertly made engravings, Fine red lacquer which managed to save the integrity of most of this- We should be able to buy some polish and filler from Sandru back in town, no sweat- High glossy shine... Fine Velvet interior?! Woo~ This is almost a shame to use it as a treasure chest. I'd say this is probably more ornamental than meant for plundering. Looks to be... From Minkai region. Holy harpies in a half-shell, they must've been way freakin' off course to end up out here. Anyways, probably worth... I'd say... 140? Maybe 150 gold?"

Davros raises an eyebrow, saying "Minkai? The hell is that?"

Not really paying attention as he rummages through the chest, Chad-for-Short says "I suppose you wouldn't know about it, being from all the way down in the Southwest from S'lurdair. It's an empire way the ******** out to the East. I've wanted to go there for years. I heard from a Farwarbler- erm... 'Bard'... that there's this league of ninja assassins that's headed up by a Tengu, which sounds awesome. When you're a race that looks like giant black chickens to most people, you don't normally get much in the way of respectable work anywhere."

"So... Why not go?"

"The... 'bards'... also say that the place has been a political hellscape for like, over 50 years or something. I don't really know any details about it."

The Tengu takes an absurd (to Ryoga and Davros) amount of care removing things from the chest to show the two:

• 6 masterwork shuriken ("Freakin' NINJAS, MAN!")
  
• a long hairpin with a gorgeous red pearl at one end (Chad-for-Short values it at a sale price of 150 gold)
  
• 329 silver
  
• 112 gold
  

The final item in the chest being an ornate gold-and-ivory fan showing a gecko walking among cherry blossoms. Chad-for-Short is quite pleased with it's value until he sees the other side. Growing incensed, he throws it on the ground, where Ryoga and Davros can see that the Goblins apparently took an inkbrush to the backside and painted on some sort of crude map. As the Tengu shouts about ruining a piece of valuable art, Davros says "Any idea what this b***h goes to?" (DC 15 intelligence or Knowledge: Local to decipher it)

The characters all gain 875 EXP for slaying all the goblins and +800 (divided by 3) for ending Gutwad's reign of poorly thought-out terror, for a total of 1,150 exp per character (I'm rounding up a little)

WHEN YOU'RE READY

You can begin to question the terrified captive goblin. Chad-for-Short will perform the required translations.

(also, one of us should probably tally up the total loot we have floating around...)  

[Kombinant]

Ryoga bends to pick up the crude map-fan thingy. Turning it around in his hands, he examines the map.

"I wonder where this leads to?"

{Int Check +0}

Still holding the fan Ryoga walks over to the bound goblin."Maybe this guy can tell us? I remember the adventurers who used to pass through liked to tell stories of brutal interrogation techniques, breaking fingers or hanging the guy over a fatal drop. We ought to try that. It'll give Davros an out for all that anger... Go ahead and ask about this map, Chad-for-Short."  

[Cowpies77]

Kombinant

"Go ahead and ask about this map, Chad-for-Short."

Chad-for-Short nods, then caws out a bunch of high pitched, screeching gibberish. The goblin nodding, begins talking in nasally squeaking gibberish, and Chad-for-Short translates (in what Ryoga is forced to imagine is Chad-for-short forming complete sentences... because GOBLINS.)
"Right, so... lets see... We mighty Licktoads killed Goblin-Eating Goblin, Vorshka, over by the lake. Found this fan. Fan had stuff marked on it. We followed it. Came across wreck in boat, then wreck in cave. Glorious day! Take looty-bits back with us and use new treasures, establish top-ness. Mighty Licktoads! Then creepy-crawly-boney monsters show up! Hack and slash! Slice and dice! Everyone dying! Mighty Gutwad toss Smarty Slorb to appease Creepy-Crawly-Boney monsters. Creepy-crawly-boney monsters kill Slorb, come for Gutwad. Gutwad had us start tossing out treasure to appease creepy-crawly-boney monsters. They take most of the treasures and drag it away. Might come back, we scared and not leave till we have to. Stay inside. Was safe until ape-man there break door."  

[Kombinant]

"So what he's basically saying is they found that map, followed it and found treasure, but when they came back here Boney-things attacked and killed a bunch of them until they got it to leave by giving the treasure?" Ryoga looks at the map in his hand with some curiosity.

"Maybe we should check this out? I mean from the sounds of it, this is a small part of the treasure that was taken...That and it sounds like it's treasure from a foreign land, and I'm all for that..."  

[Cowpies77]

Kombinant

"So what he's basically saying is they found that map, followed it and found treasure, but when they came back here Boney-things attacked and killed a bunch of them until they got it to leave by giving the treasure?"

"Sounds like it."

Kombinant

"Maybe we should check this out? I mean from the sounds of it, this is a small part of the treasure that was taken...That and it sounds like it's treasure from a foreign land, and I'm all for that..."

"Well, Let's get moving then. Have the little c**k-mangler here go lead the way and-"

"Erm... Slight problem." Chad-for-Short interrupts. "I'm kinda runnin' low on power and if there's any sizable number of skeletons, we'll want me at full strength to help repulse them. I'm all tapped out for useful spells and running low on prayers."

Grumbling, Davros says "FINE! Whatever. We'll stay here tonight and have the little green bandit lead in the morning!"

NEXT MORNING...
The monk and pugilist wake up to a commotion of Chad-for-Short shouting and hollering. Looking around, the goblin seems to have slipped out of his bonds and fled into the swamp. Leaping to their feet, Chad-for-Short is found near the brine-water pond with a two pots, one feeding boiling water into the other.
Chad-for-Short's feathers are scattered about the area, as it looks like he and an unknown person have been wrestling on the ground for a short while. She seems to have managed to get a slight upper hand, ending up on top (but with Chad-for-Short wrapping his legs around her waist and hugging her to keep on her her arms pinned down) and she's throwing some rather clumsy punches (at least in Davros' and Ryoga's opinion) at him with her free hand and he tries to peck her into submission.
Ryoga moves to pull the two of them apart and makes some small apologies to the traveling woman.

Davros meanwhile picks up Chad-for-short and says almost incredulously "... Are you getting your a** handed to you by a GIRL?! I hope to Hells you don't have a man card or I'm taking that s**t from you!"

"Well, I'm not trying to kill her-"

"GOOD, Because it looks like she was winning!"

"Well, who just walks into a goblin village!?"

"We do? That's kind of how we did it yesterday." Ryoga says, helping the girl to her feet. Looking her over, she's about 5'9", maybe 120- no... 110 lbs with straight black hair tied into a pony tail, Tucked into her armor, which consists of a padded apron over leather armor, and a couple belts holding various vials and bottles filled with strange liquids. She wears goggles on her head, and a rather big smile on her face, seemingly enjoying the wrassling with Chad-for-Short. Ryoga recognizes her from the village (and she recognizes him), but both can't put a name to the face.

"Shouldn't that be EX-goblin village? There aren't really any goblins left here."

"Truth. Sorry, but we kinda finished off the last of the goblins in here and knocked the last nail in Gutwad's metaphorical coffin yesterday."

The Tengu puffs out his chest a bit, making his feathers fluff out and making him look something like a giant chick than a grown a** tengu, right up until the contents of the first water pot bursts into flames, leaving him screeching in panic as he tries to figure out how he's burning water.

"Sorry about all that. Especially if you came out here for the goblins. I'm Ryoga, the big guy is Davros, and the feathered one is-"
"Chakka-chakka-chuuko-bucha-bukha-wikki-wikki."
"We call him 'Chad-for-Short'. What's your name?"  

[MT the Clown]

Huffing a bit, the girl lets out a low snarl as her breathing slowly evens out. Sharply turning her head, a few pops ring out from her neck before a friendly smile forms on her face. Standing up straight, she tips her head slightly, "Name's Kim. Kimberly Nietroix. Pleasure."  

[Cowpies77]

Getting the pan fire under control, Chad-for-Short says "I should have enough water to make some breakfast in a few... tens of minutes. Everyone cool with smoked sausages? I can fry them up, serve it with some fried onion and duck eggs I found this morning. And I have some raspberry jam I made cooling in the pond and some flatbread cooking on another fire."

The stomachs of all three travelers kinda growl a bit, and Davros says "I... have some cheese?"

"Was that a question?"

"Do something with it?"

"Like... an omelette? "

Eventually, with Ryoga inviting Kim to breakfast, the group sit down and eat a surprisingly tasty meal that hits the spot. Ryoga quietly appreciates the fact that he asked a cook to come travel to the middle of a swamp with him. The thought of trying to eat a poisonous snakes or the ugly-a** fish Davros caught (via punchin) otherwise seeming rather unappetizing.
The food really hits the spot though, and the party members gain a +1 morale bonus for the next 4 hours in-game on all rolls.

So, will the party be heading back to the village, or embark to go find the wrecks of the ship/remaining treasure?

(Also, MT, can you use a different color for Kim's speech? I'm kinda already using orange for Davros.

The party's currently carrying

• 6 masterwork shuriken
  
• 1 long hairpin with a gorgeous red pearl at one end (valued at 150gp by Chad-for-short)
  
• 329 silver
  
• 135 gold
  
• 5 Red wooden tubes with gold double-stripe patterns
  
• 3 blue wooden tube with white star patterns on them
  
• 16 dogslicer blades
  
• 15 small shields (small)
  
• 15 leather armor (small)
  
• 6 normal arrows
  
• 5 "Magic" arrows (As Identified by Chad-for-Short)
  
• 2 potions of cure light wounds (As identified by Chad-for-short)
  
• 1 Masterwork Chain Shirt (small)
  
• 1 Masterwork Composite Longbow (small)
  
• 1 spear (small)
  
• 1 red Treasured chest

 

[MT the Clown]

Thankful for the meal, Kim nods her head towards the chest, "Thanks for the food... What's wrong with the chest over there? Seems kinda fancy for you lot just to be lugging around."

((votes for pressing on))  

[Kombinant]

"That thing? We found it after we finished off the last of the goblins. Chad-for-Short reckons it's worth something, that and he's enamored with it. A fair portion of our loot was in it, even some weird colorful rods."

Ryoga stands and casually walks over to where they left the items. Reaching down within he pulls out the fan/map. "So shall we follow this thing?"

(Press On!)