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 Posted: Tue Aug 11, 2015 6:43 am
He didn't want this night to end.
He was afraid if it did, that the spell between them would be broken somehow; that Hitch would wake up, take a look at him, and realize he'd made a mistake in all of the promises he'd made, all the beautiful words and the tender gestures he'd given him. The fear coiled up inside of Tolliver like an ugly black cloud, but he couldn't think that way, couldn't focus on the what might be, had to focus on the what is and was. And Hitch was here, warm and solid, and his eyes were bright around the edges, his hands heavy and reassuring on his hips and thighs, and Tolliver bent his head, lips finding the corners of his eyes to mimic the gesture from before, kissing away the tears he could see.
They were both exhausted, but still; Tolliver wanted to do this one last thing for him (last of perhaps the next several hours, at least, not the last forever, he hoped desperately it wouldn't be), because Hitch had already reassured him, multiple times, of things that for normal people would only require one single promise. His patience in constantly reminding Tolliver of his affections was more prized and adored than Hitch would ever know, because many times that patience gave way to frustration and exasperation that Tolliver was simply not understanding or getting it or believing him. He could still recall his parents, Fritz even, rolling their eyes or heaving a breath that they had to explain something again and again, because Tolliver's mind just couldn't seem to take everything in the first time, because the anxiety skyrocketed and he needed that constant reassurance.
And Hitch was willing to give it to him, at least so far; and all Tolliver wanted to do now was return the favor.
He pressed his lips against Hitch's ear, shivering at the sound that left his throat, at the words that were growled out, at the hand that was at his neck, delving into his hair. Tolliver felt warmth on his face, sweeping through him, and he shifted a little, hips against Hitch's, hands slowly sliding down his chest. His fingers were shaking with nerves, and his face burned, because he didn't know if he could do it, but he wanted to, badly, he wanted to give Hitch some semblance of what he'd given him.
He lifted his head to press another kiss to Hitch's lips, breath trembling as he moved to his jaw, then his neck, then his collar and chest again. And lower still, across his stomach, Tolliver's kisses less messy than Hitch's, simple chaste things almost, with little flickers of warmth.
But he stopped, lifted his head again, and looked down at Hitch, biting his lip.
"I'm sorry if it's bad," he whispered, swallowing hard. "I've never - I mean, I haven't ever - but I want to, I want you to feel - "
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Posted: Tue Aug 11, 2015 7:26 am
It was such a simple little thing, lips brushing beneath his eyes to gather the lingering moisture there. Quietly, secretly, Hitch had some thoughts, maybe even some fleeting fantasies that he wouldn't dare say aloud - maybe a Christmas that wasn't spent alone and heavy with grief, better off forgotten than remembered. Maybe a birthday where someone wanted to take him out for a drink to celebrate the big year. Maybe a night spent listening to Tolliver's music, or hell, sitting sit by sit with one set of headphones. It was the stupidest, most frivolous things, and all of them were Hitch getting ahead of himself because all of those things were still so far away and so much could go wrong between now and then.
But he wanted it, no, hungered for it, and even if it was too much assuming way too soon, he could imagine it. That was more than he'd had, and he was so ******** grateful already just for having him here, that Tolliver would waste his time on him at all.
And now he wanted to do this for him, too. It felt like too much, but it wasn't like he could ******** get enough either.
Hitch's head was heavy against the pillows, and after the kiss he'd already tossed his head to a side, his hair hanging in a shaggy mess all around his head. His hand stayed on the back of Tolliver's neck, lingering and heavy and twitching each time his lips grazed an especially sensitive patch of skin. His stomach quivered when his lover traveled over it, and Hitch's breath was already ragged even now.
Then, he stopped - but Hitch didn't seem annoyed, and he wasn't. He had no reason to be. He grinned that lazily, languid smile as his hand slid from Tolliver's neck to settle on his cheek, his thumb running over the line of his lover's cheekbone. "No one's done this for me before, " he murmured, "So everythin' you're doin' is new to me, babe... you don't gotta push yourself. No matter what you do, it's gonna be ********' amazin' to me."
His grin turned just the faintest bit playful, edging on mischievous. "Just try not to bite it off. That'd sorta suck for both of us." He slid his fingers through Tolliver's hair in a reassuring way, hoping to calm him down. But it would be okay, even if Tolliver pulled back - the fact that he wanted to was really more than enough for him.
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Posted: Tue Aug 11, 2015 7:42 am
Was it possible to fall in love so quickly after such a short time?
But the "time" part was relevant, wasn't it? They'd met on New Year's, found each other months later again, fell into bed unintentionally, had their argument, and then several days later, everything had fallen into place between them. And yet, it wasn't really that short of a time frame, it just felt like both new and forever at the same time. What was between them burned hotter each time they saw each other, not less, and now it coursed through Tolliver's veins, engulfing him completely.
And he was falling so very hard and so very deeply for Logan Hitchcock.
Hitch's warm hand on his cheek was reassuring; Tolliver's eyes fluttered half shut and he lifted his own hand to cover Hitch's, fingers tangling together. He blushed furiously at the last playful comment, face burning, but he turned his own to kiss Hitch's palm, slow and sweet before letting go. He dropped his head, forehead against Hitch's stomach, and a shuddering breath escaped him.
"Logan," he whispered softly, and it wouldn't be a name he used all the time. Most likely it would be reserved for moments like this, when they were entangled with one another, or when his emotions ran high, because it felt too special to be used casually. He didn't mind Tolli used whenever, because it made him feel wonderful, but something about Logan Tolliver wanted to reserve. His hands rested lightly on Hitch's waist, Tolliver nuzzling his stomach, lower still.
And then he didn't need words to say just how he felt, just himself.
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