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 Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 11:27 am
Shanna66 i knew i didnt want to be with someone who took longer getting ready than i do Bah, I know some men who take an hour to get ready just to go to walmart. Have to have their mustache trimmed just right, their shirt set just right, their coffee mug filled and sugared just right. That sounds OCDish, but so do some of the things women do as well.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 11:54 am
I hate shopping and I boycott Black Friday. I am a very low maintenance kinda gal... I like nerdy stuff, such as video games, science-fiction, and anime... I know how to fly and work on airplanes... I can shoot a rifle better than allot of guys around here... I have had more than a couple guys tell me that I seem like the perfect chick, and that other girls are crazy but I am relate-able.
BUT... Everyone has issues with at least a couple things... Just isn't always right in your face...
I myself have several that don't surface in everyday life, but when they do get a chance to come to light, it is interesting if not ugly. rolleyes
I mean, what's better, knowing what you are contending with, or suddenly becoming enlightened after so long with a person...
My husband, I think, finally knows all of my (that I can think of) issues... and most of the time he is really amused... But some other guys might have looked at me and said, "I'm outta here!"
I mean, allot of people would find it disturbing that I sometime punch clowns that get too close (even if I probably know who is behind the make-up), or that the bath tub drain creeps me out, or that puppets, baby dolls, and guys in character suits creep me out...
I kinda go off about certain words that sound stupid to me, but that isn't anything that will put a hindrance on day-to-day living when I encounter them.
I black-out rage when I rip pants, blow-out shoes, or spill paint....
I'm not a fashionista by any means. I have less shoes than any of the members of my house, and some of the shoes I do have are over 15 years old... but I love my jeans because I am picky about how they fit, and with a scarcity of anytime shoes, I am left hanging when a pair go out on me before their time... But, it affects me more than is logical, and it is hard for me to control myself.
Anyways, when it comes to things like this, it is really a matter of finding the person that isn't put off by those flaws.... and I am sure that there is a few compatible people for everyone, so sooner or later there is a real possibility you will find one of those people whoever you are.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 12:03 pm
deadmanjay Shanna66 i knew i didnt want to be with someone who took longer getting ready than i do Bah, I know some men who take an hour to get ready just to go to walmart. Have to have their mustache trimmed just right, their shirt set just right, their coffee mug filled and sugared just right. That sounds OCDish, but so do some of the things women do as well. lol true, there are men like that
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 1:39 pm
Eltanin Sadachbia I hate shopping and I boycott Black Friday. I am a very low maintenance kinda gal... I like nerdy stuff, such as video games, science-fiction, and anime... I know how to fly and work on airplanes... I can shoot a rifle better than allot of guys around here... I have had more than a couple guys tell me that I seem like the perfect chick, and that other girls are crazy but I am relate-able. BUT... Everyone has issues with at least a couple things... Just isn't always right in your face... I myself have several that don't surface in everyday life, but when they do get a chance to come to light, it is interesting if not ugly. rolleyes I mean, what's better, knowing what you are contending with, or suddenly becoming enlightened after so long with a person... My husband, I think, finally knows all of my (that I can think of) issues... and most of the time he is really amused... But some other guys might have looked at me and said, "I'm outta here!" I mean, allot of people would find it disturbing that I sometime punch clowns that get too close (even if I probably know who is behind the make-up), or that the bath tub drain creeps me out, or that puppets, baby dolls, and guys in character suits creep me out... I kinda go off about certain words that sound stupid to me, but that isn't anything that will put a hindrance on day-to-day living when I encounter them. I black-out rage when I rip pants, blow-out shoes, or spill paint.... I'm not a fashionista by any means. I have less shoes than any of the members of my house, and some of the shoes I do have are over 15 years old... but I love my jeans because I am picky about how they fit, and with a scarcity of anytime shoes, I am left hanging when a pair go out on me before their time... But, it affects me more than is logical, and it is hard for me to control myself. Anyways, when it comes to things like this, it is really a matter of finding the person that isn't put off by those flaws.... and I am sure that there is a few compatible people for everyone, so sooner or later there is a real possibility you will find one of those people whoever you are. Is that like, don't stop looking because there is someone for everyone? Besides, I didn't mean all ladies go crazy on sales... nor that all guys scream when something happens they don't like. I was just using them as a examples how everyone is insane in their own way. My only statement was IF God wants me to have a wife, then God will show me her... I am not going to be looking anymore.
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 3:29 pm
Southern_cross_nemesis My only statement was IF God wants me to have a wife, then God will show me her... I am not going to be looking anymore. It was just a whole, "Don't write off relationship because people are crazies..." Because you are right... they are crazy, but not everyone is crazy in the same way... So you just need to find someone crazy in all the right ways that fits you... ... But how you do it is up to you... I had to give up looking, before I found someone, and then, when he appeared, I couldn't miss him (although at the time I was trying xp )... The thing is, I think allot of people miss their compatibles because they are so scared of being alone that they fight to make doomed relationships last as long as they can rag them out for... I think the key to finding the right person at the right time is pretty much an issue in coming to terms with yourself. I think the best relationships I have ever seen to date (mine own included) hinge on each partner being able to live without the other, yet being able to willingly depend on each other for support... A true partnership in which each person is self sufficient, but when put together the team is unstoppable, so to speak...
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 6:02 pm
Eltanin Sadachbia I think the key to finding the right person at the right time is pretty much an issue in coming to terms with yourself. I think the best relationships I have ever seen to date (mine own included) hinge on each partner being able to live without the other, yet being able to willingly depend on each other for support... A true partnership in which each person is self sufficient, but when put together the team is unstoppable, so to speak... I never went on a date in my life(unless if you count taking a few friends to prom and other high school dances) so I know how to live by myself. I know my issue revolves around trust of other people(for all but one of "best" friends turning against me and leaving me just like that) or myself ... I just don't care anymore about finding Miss's right or any friends in real life. I will follow Christ to the grave, and will give what I have to help others. I just don't see a point anymore...
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 6:34 pm
Well, I can't say that I don't understand that, because I actually do... I only had one guy that was nearly my boyfriend (but he messed up) before my husband came along.
Except for one old friend, I am not really in touch with any of my old friends that I grew up with, and even she is sort of a hit and miss thing.... I parted ways with all the others for several reasons, but most of those partings weren't pretty.
I had trust and commitment issues because I was bullied in elementary, and an outcast through high-school... Small town and all, you can't shake a rep once you earn it, no matter what age you earned it at... and since I didn't really earn mine, I just sorta got coined because of another girl's jealousy... I kinda held a grudge towards the whole community for a long time...
I got coined a slut in FOURTH GRADE because I played sports on the all boys teams... There wasn't enough guys to fill the teams so they let girls join, and I happened to be the only one who did so that year...
After that I was shunned, even by teachers... and all through high-school I never had a boyfriend because no one wanted to date me, or they wanted to date me because they believed everyone else who said they had been with me... It was just as well really, when I looked into it, I was related in some way or another to everyone. BWHAHAHAH! And discovering that knowledge was all it took to get assholes to leave me alone...
The thing is... It IS alright to be alone, and if you are resigned to it, then more power to you... There is allot less to worry about when you only have to worry about yourself and your relationship with God... But if you are resigning yourself to that because you aren't confident in yourself, I think you are shortchanging the possibilities of life... But that is just my opinion...
The people in your life will come and go, in and out throughout the years all the way to your end... It might sound depressing, but really, if you think about it, it leaves everyone open to grow and expand, taking with them from every relationship that is formed, new knowledge and understanding of oneself...
Even my relationship with my husband will one day end, I expect it will be when one of us dies, but even then, it is still a temporary arrangement... But knowing that doesn't make me want to call it quits now for fear of the future...
So, in recognizing all things are temporary but my relationship with God, I was able to overcome my issues of trust and commitment... they aren't such a scary notion anymore... and it was also that realization that gave me the confidence I needed to give my relationship with my husband a try, and I haven't regretted it...
I guess SCN, I really just want to encourage you to not be so final or feel so defeated when it comes to the possibility of relationships... Be confident in knowing that you can do just fine on your own, but don't build walls so high that you miss out on having a gal, if God decides that's what you need...
And as for friends, try to realize that friends come and go, enjoy people why they are in your life, but don't close the door on new relationships, just because your old ones don't work out... People move on, and they grow... You learn something from everyone, and God wants us to show love, but you can't really do that if you push everyone away...
I know people can be frustrating, but try to do what I do, and attempt to see each person you are looking at as an individual, and not part of the mass... People are horrible, but individuals aren't so bad. sweatdrop
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Posted: Wed Nov 30, 2011 8:21 pm
I know the club I am in would yell at me... but I will try... no promises
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Posted: Mon Jan 23, 2012 10:08 am
Wow christians who are reasnoble on yet another subject. Only wish there were more like you.
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Posted: Wed Jan 25, 2012 10:39 am
Socika Wow christians who are reasnoble on yet another subject. Only wish there were more like you. Reasonable Christians are actually the majority. We are just not as loud as the others. If we were, we wouldn't be reasonable.
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Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 4:09 pm
this topic has me wanting to ask a question i have been wondering about for a while now. how is BDSM relationships viewed by many Christians? i have many friends on a site i'm on that are married and practice the BDSM life. me and my husband do as well. this is one reason we are having a hard time finding a church we are comfy going to because so many in rural areas like where we live are fast to condem us on any aspect of the life style (such as my collar or the fact i call my husband Daddy or Sir)
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Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 4:33 pm
Lil Enslaved Kitten this topic has me wanting to ask a question i have been wondering about for a while now. how is BDSM relationships viewed by many Christians? i have many friends on a site i'm on that are married and practice the BDSM life. me and my husband do as well. this is one reason we are having a hard time finding a church we are comfy going to because so many in rural areas like where we live are fast to condem us on any aspect of the life style (such as my collar or the fact i call my husband Daddy or Sir) As I see it, I see no issue with it, other than painful and demeaning. But, as long as the two party members are both consending adults and both are not pressured... There is no issue. The bible says in a number of places, Man and wife should be as one (Genesis and Ephesians are the two that come straight to mind). If nether one feels pressured, then it is a bonding thing.... still painful in my mind, but I am not going to belittle anyone for the way they bond with their spouse.
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Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 4:37 pm
glitterboypilot Lil Enslaved Kitten this topic has me wanting to ask a question i have been wondering about for a while now. how is BDSM relationships viewed by many Christians? i have many friends on a site i'm on that are married and practice the BDSM life. me and my husband do as well. this is one reason we are having a hard time finding a church we are comfy going to because so many in rural areas like where we live are fast to condem us on any aspect of the life style (such as my collar or the fact i call my husband Daddy or Sir) As I see it, I see no issue with it, other than painful and demeaning. But, as long as the two party members are both consending adults and both are not pressured... There is no issue. The bible says in a number of places, Man and wife should be as one (Genesis and Ephesians are the two that come straight to mind). If nether one feels pressured, then it is a bonding thing.... still painful in my mind, but I am not going to belittle anyone for the way they bond with their spouse. the bonding involved is amazing i will say that i've never been closer to anyone then i am my husband.
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Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 4:53 pm
Lil Enslaved Kitten glitterboypilot Lil Enslaved Kitten this topic has me wanting to ask a question i have been wondering about for a while now. how is BDSM relationships viewed by many Christians? i have many friends on a site i'm on that are married and practice the BDSM life. me and my husband do as well. this is one reason we are having a hard time finding a church we are comfy going to because so many in rural areas like where we live are fast to condem us on any aspect of the life style (such as my collar or the fact i call my husband Daddy or Sir) As I see it, I see no issue with it, other than painful and demeaning. But, as long as the two party members are both consending adults and both are not pressured... There is no issue. The bible says in a number of places, Man and wife should be as one (Genesis and Ephesians are the two that come straight to mind). If nether one feels pressured, then it is a bonding thing.... still painful in my mind, but I am not going to belittle anyone for the way they bond with their spouse. the bonding involved is amazing i will say that i've never been closer to anyone then i am my husband. Like I said, their really isn't any issue. The only problem comes in to the fact that many others don't want to try something because it causes them to think differently.(in this case about pain, bonding, and submission) Thous they call it evil or bad. Then again, I am just a single guy, who has no plans of ever getting married.... or having a girlfriend.
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Posted: Thu Mar 22, 2012 5:58 pm
glitterboypilot Lil Enslaved Kitten glitterboypilot Lil Enslaved Kitten this topic has me wanting to ask a question i have been wondering about for a while now. how is BDSM relationships viewed by many Christians? i have many friends on a site i'm on that are married and practice the BDSM life. me and my husband do as well. this is one reason we are having a hard time finding a church we are comfy going to because so many in rural areas like where we live are fast to condem us on any aspect of the life style (such as my collar or the fact i call my husband Daddy or Sir) As I see it, I see no issue with it, other than painful and demeaning. But, as long as the two party members are both consending adults and both are not pressured... There is no issue. The bible says in a number of places, Man and wife should be as one (Genesis and Ephesians are the two that come straight to mind). If nether one feels pressured, then it is a bonding thing.... still painful in my mind, but I am not going to belittle anyone for the way they bond with their spouse. the bonding involved is amazing i will say that i've never been closer to anyone then i am my husband. Like I said, their really isn't any issue. The only problem comes in to the fact that many others don't want to try something because it causes them to think differently.(in this case about pain, bonding, and submission) Thous they call it evil or bad. Then again, I am just a single guy, who has no plans of ever getting married.... or having a girlfriend. sorry it took so long but i do believe that lack of knowledge and the willingness to understand is the main problem. where i was raised in a strict southern baptist home my family was not very accepting of my way of life till after many long talks and the fact that they wanted to understand.
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