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Taylor: Lorelei your late, again
Lorelei: *gasps* I hope I'm not pregnant!
Taylor: Well you're late, I banged the meeting in thirty minutes ago.
Lorelei: Dirty!

Lorelai: what are you doing?
[kiss]
Luke: What are you doing?
[kiss]
{Kirk runs down naked, with pillow}
Kirk: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

I DON'T ALL THE WORDS BUT I REALLY LIKED WHEN SHE SADI THE THING ABOUT HAVING LUKE DRESS UP FOR HALLOWEEN AND SHE WANTED TO HAVE SAUSAGE LINKS COMING OUT OF HIM

THAT WAS JUST HIL.


ALSO WHEN THEY WERE AT RORY'S 21 B - DAY PARTY AND AND THE PARENTS AND LORALIE WERE IN THE OFFICE AND THE PARENTS SAID WE HAVENT'D FAILED UNTIL SHE CAME HOME PREG. AND LORALIE SAID WELL, THAT'S MY QUE TO LEAVE

THAT WAS A GOOD ONE 2

Sorry if these have been posted...

[Lorelai's having Rory]
Young Lorelai: Okay, this is a big pain and I'd really like it to go away, please.
Nurse: Just breathe deep, honey.
Young Lorelai: Breathing doesn't help, can I hit you instead?
Nurse: What?
Young Lorelai: Or pinch you really hard, 'cause that might make me feel better.
Nurse: No, you cannot hit me.
Young Lorelai: Can I bite you or pull your hair or use the Epilady on you 'cause I really need to do something.

Rory: Do something to make me hate you!
Lorelai: Um, go Hitler?

Lorelai: Luke, will you marry me?
Luke: What?

Lorelai: Mom, it's just a pretend wedding. J-Lo has them all the time.

Lorelai: Okay, I think we just found the first room in the history of the world that would've made Liberace say 'Whoa. Step back. No one's that gay.'

Lorelai: Heh, you know what I just realized? "Oy" is the funniest word in the entire world.
Rory: Hmm.
Lorelai: I mean think about it, you never hear the word "oy" and not smile. Impossible. Funny, funny word.
Emily: Oh dear God.
Lorelai: "Poodle" is another funny word.
Emily: Please drink your drink, Lorelai.
Lorelai: In fact, if you put "oy" and "poodle" together, in the same sentence, you'd have a great new catchphrase, you know? Like, "Oy with the poodles already."
Rory: Hehe.
Lorelai: So from now on, when the perfect circumstances arise, we will use our favorite new catchphrase:
Rory: Oy with the poodles already.
Lorelai: I'm telling you, it's knocking "Whatchu talkin' 'bout, Willis?" right out of first place.

Richard: I was just on the telephone long distance!
Lorelai:With God?
R: I took a call that came from London
L:God lives in london?
R: I was on the phone with a very pretty woman
L:So, God IS a woman
R:I was on the phone with your grandmother
L:Wow! Grandma knows God?
R: Lorelai, this is not the time for your jokes!
L: I still cant get over the fact that Grandma knows God!!!!!! That means she can get me favors and stuff!

(it may be a bit jumbled)

Rory gets a call on her cell in Luke's Diner. Since cell phones aren't allowed there, she stands up and is going to go outside when Lorelai asks where she's going. Rory points to the cell phone sign.

Rory: I do not want to incur the wrath of Luke!

Lorelai: Why not it's fun.

There are so many that I have wanted to share but this was before I knew about this forum so I have forgotten most of them, here are a few though:

Episode: Happy birthday baby, season 3
LORELAI: [answers phone] Hello?

KAREN: Lorelai Gilmore?

LORELAI: You got her.

KAREN: I?m calling from Richard Gilmore?s office.

LORELAI: Never heard of him. rofl

KAREN: Richard Gilmore, your father.

LORELAI: Oh, tall, bow tie?

KAREN: Yes.

LORELAI: Yes, I?m with you now, go ahead.

Thats a funny one rofl , there's also:


Episode: Girls in bikinis, boys doin' the twist

RORY: Mom, where's my bathing suit?

LORELAI: Uh...do you have a bathing suit?

RORY: Of course I have a bathing suit.

LORELAI: When was the last time you wore it?

RORY: I don't remember.

LORELAI: Uh, did it involve a rubber ducky? rofl

RORY: No...I don't think.

--------------------------------------------------------

LORELAI: So now, tell me again- who's driving?

RORY: Glenn. It's his mom's van.

LORELAI: And this Glenn- he's a good driver?

RORY: I have no idea.

LORELAI: Kid- you've got to learn to lie. rofl

RORY: Glenn's a very responsible guy. I'm sure it will be fine.

LORELAI: And the place you're staying is safe?

RORY: Yes.

LORELAI: Now you're catching on. rofl


Episode: Love, Daisies, and Troubadours

(Lorelai is asleep in bed. She is awoken suddenly by a loud banging noise.)

LORELAI: Dear God Almighty Mr. Mirkle! rofl

------------------------------------------------------------

TAYLOR: All those opposed. (Lorelai raises her hand) Lorelai, you don't even know what were voting on.

LORELAI: Yeah, but I'm a-gin it!
rofl

TAYLOR: Lorelai, I hope that's not food in those bags. Food is not allowed at town meetings.

LORELAI: No, Taylor its not. Its, um, diapers for the little ones. rofl

TAYLOR: What?

LORELAI: Dorsal fins and cucamonga. rofl

TAYLOR: What did she say

LORELAI (whispers to Max): I confuse him till he loses his train of thought and then he moves on. Hot dog?

(Later)

LORELAI: Hear them out Taylor. It can't hurt. (Taylor looks at the bag she's holding in her hand) These are not fries. They are farfignugen sugen dugen.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Lorelai walks in the front door. She puts the mail on the hall table, then hears a noise upstairs.)

LORELAI: Hello?

(She grabs an umbrella from the front hall. She hears footsteps around the corner. She walks towards them holding out the umbrella. She jumps into the living room.)

LORELAI: Hold it right there! Oh! Oh!

LUKE: It's only me!

LORELAI: You scared me half to death!

LUKE: Who'd you think it was?

LORELAI: Well, I don't know! I heard some thudding upstairs and Rory weighs like ten ounces, and it either had to be an escaped elephant, or some strange large man who should not be in the house. How did you get in here anyway? rofl

LUKE: Through the back door.

LORELAI: The back door's locked.

LUKE: No, that's why I came, the back door lock was broken.

LORELAI: The back door lock was fine.

LUKE: The back door lock was cheap.

LORELAI: The back door lock came with the house. It's been a very fine back door lock.

LUKE: It's the kind of lock burglars look for.

LORELAI: Why do burglars look for that lock?

LUKE: Because it's easy to break into. I proved that.

LORELAI: You proved that by . . .?

LUKE: Breaking in through the back door.

LORELAI: Oh my God! rofl

LUKE: It's the only way I could get in.

LORELAI: You have crossed over into the dark side Luke. rofl

I love heart this part, me and my sis always laugh so hard when seeing it, it is so hilarious especialy her jumping out and almost hitting Luke with the umbrella! lol. I'll post more when I remember more.