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 Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 12:58 am
Violet Song jat Shariff erinnightwalker Violet Song jat Shariff erinnightwalker in the original post i made on that thread, i gave my opinion on the relationship between god and devotee. i've been defending myself ever since. Your opinion on things doesn't always equate to the way things actually are though. And you are expressing your opinion by using as an example the things you are already doing neutral yes.... researching the culture that the gods came from.... reading every myth relating to that culture i could get my hands on.... being damned careful not to offend the gods in any way.... and trying to understand why this makes me a terrible person. did i miss anything? oh, yes- having the presumption to think that a lifetime of interest and research about ancient celtic life and myth might give me enough of a connection to at least offer reverence to the pantheon. It's a mistake that happens quite often, really. Either authors tend to leave out the handy fact that Celt culture is closed, or readers don't think for some reason, that they are for some reason the exception to the gods' oath. No one is saying you aren't devoted or don't know enough. We are simply saying, that your worship is misplaced. It's really not so awful. it is to me. they have guided me through some very bad times in my life, and now i'm supposed to believe that they aren't there? that they never were? its like losing a part of my soul.....
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 1:15 am
erinnightwalker it is to me. they have guided me through some very bad times in my life, and now i'm supposed to believe that they aren't there? that they never were? its like losing a part of my soul..... I know. It sucks. It hurts. Quite a few here have been through this process, myself included. I wouldn't say that no deity was there to help you, but perhaps it was a different entity that said they were someone they actually weren't? There are trickster gods running about, you know wink .
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Violet Song jat Shariff Crew
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 2:48 am
erinnightwalker Violet Song jat Shariff erinnightwalker Violet Song jat Shariff erinnightwalker in the original post i made on that thread, i gave my opinion on the relationship between god and devotee. i've been defending myself ever since. Your opinion on things doesn't always equate to the way things actually are though. And you are expressing your opinion by using as an example the things you are already doing neutral yes.... researching the culture that the gods came from.... reading every myth relating to that culture i could get my hands on.... being damned careful not to offend the gods in any way.... and trying to understand why this makes me a terrible person. did i miss anything? oh, yes- having the presumption to think that a lifetime of interest and research about ancient celtic life and myth might give me enough of a connection to at least offer reverence to the pantheon. It's a mistake that happens quite often, really. Either authors tend to leave out the handy fact that Celt culture is closed, or readers don't think for some reason, that they are for some reason the exception to the gods' oath. No one is saying you aren't devoted or don't know enough. We are simply saying, that your worship is misplaced. It's really not so awful. it is to me. they have guided me through some very bad times in my life, and now i'm supposed to believe that they aren't there? that they never were? its like losing a part of my soul..... Perhaps they were there, only the name they gave you was not true. Perhaps they saw your calling for a god, and answered their call. I hope I'm not being insulting, I know this epiphany is painful, I'm still struggling to understand culture better myself, and with it, a lot of my beliefs over the last like seven or eight years come in to question...
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 10:36 am
erinnightwalker it is to me. they have guided me through some very bad times in my life, and now i'm supposed to believe that they aren't there? that they never were? its like losing a part of my soul..... Like others have said, you could have been following beings that you misinterpreted, that aren't a part of that pantheon. Or you could have created thoughtforms to benefit you. The experiences you had are still valid. They just aren't of the gods you thought they were coming from. Cherish those experiences and correct your misnaming of their source. Your soul will stay intact and you'll be better for this growth.
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 10:44 am
@Everyone who responded:
Thank you for your support. It doesn't help a lot unfortunately, because online sourced hugs and words of comfort rarely do in a situation like this, but it does help a little.
I'm probably going to read his email to me today. Hopefully it won't be as bad as my mind is imagining it.
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 3:00 pm
If you need actual talky-ness Poe, you've got my skype. You're more than welcome to call me on it if you need to. heart
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 3:42 pm
erinnightwalker... How did you know it was those particular Gods? What I'm getting at is that, if you have researched and studied a particular pantheon, it's not unreasonable to say "oh...this fits", when it's really only seeming to fit because you haven't looked at any of the other possibilities.
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 4:41 pm
TeaDidikai mute_coyote TeaDidikai maenad nuri Although mute, generic is fine. There's not really a difference ever between generic and name brand. True that. They're held to the same purity and quality standards the name brands are- they're just cheaper because they don't have to make up research costs. Are you sure they don't change the composition at all? The first day I switched to generic, I slept for about 18 hours. Then about 15 for the next two days. Most nights, I'd sleep 12+ hours if I could. Now, I've always been fond of sleep, but this is quite a shift. I'm not that stressed, and I don't feel particularly sick. Barring something unforeseen, I'm blaming the med change. They're not supposed to change anything. If they do- they're not allowed to call it the generic brand of X. Well, I was taking Zoloft, the active ingredient in which is supposed to be sertraline. The pharmacist switched me over to a drug known only as sertraline. When I mentioned the sleep issue to the pharmacist the other day, she went with it and didn't say anything like "well, there shouldn't be any difference." I'll have to consult my doctor for further details. @Recursive Paradox: As you said, online hugs and words rarely help, but I offer you mine anyway on the off chance they do. I really hope you're dad comes around. Sometimes, parents have this image of their kids so built up in their mind that when their offspring does something to disturb or even shatter that image, they react poorly (whether the shattering is objectively positive, negative, neutral, etc). *hugs*
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 6:44 pm
erinnightwalker crappy- i have people on here attacking me because of my perception of godhood and the way that i relate with my gods (don't you just love it when a complete and total stranger tells you to ******** off, those are my gods, you can't play with them? ******** two year olds..... though i can understand part of the reason that they are yelling.... and i'm sure that they are nice people..... come on, where are those happy thoughts..... evil ) You know what's really crappy? The ******** smack down you deserve for poaching Gods that don't want you off of a culture you have nothing to do with. No wait, that's not crappy, that's ******** sick. But I'm going to go drink some juice, calm down, and remind myself that being part of a Celtic clan does not make me a Gael, so my anger is only a pittance compared to Cu's.
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 7:09 pm
mute_coyote Well, I was taking Zoloft, the active ingredient in which is supposed to be sertraline. The pharmacist switched me over to a drug known only as sertraline. When I mentioned the sleep issue to the pharmacist the other day, she went with it and didn't say anything like "well, there shouldn't be any difference." I'll have to consult my doctor for further details. I'm not a fan of it when they do things like this - it may be easier on the wallet, but it's not always easier on the body. F'rinstance, while Zoloft is Sertraline Hydrochloride, the generic is not necessarily bioequivalent to the brand name (they rarely are direct equals if the trade's still patented, there's some little formulation differences), and insomnia is listed as a common side effect of sertraline hydrochloride in my drug guide - the minor formulation difference between the two could be all it took to cause you to suffer from that particular effect. I'd talk to the doc for sure, and let them know what happened with the generic switch, and ask about the bioequivalency. 3nodding Edit: And then I noticed INSOMNIA isn't the problem, it's SOMNOLENCE. *facedesk* I need to sleep more. Can we trade issues, mute? crying Same advice does apply though, it's still a common side effect. Ask doc about bioequivalency between generic and name brand. 3nodding
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 8:52 pm
Byaggha mute_coyote Well, I was taking Zoloft, the active ingredient in which is supposed to be sertraline. The pharmacist switched me over to a drug known only as sertraline. When I mentioned the sleep issue to the pharmacist the other day, she went with it and didn't say anything like "well, there shouldn't be any difference." I'll have to consult my doctor for further details. I'm not a fan of it when they do things like this - it may be easier on the wallet, but it's not always easier on the body. F'rinstance, while Zoloft is Sertraline Hydrochloride, the generic is not necessarily bioequivalent to the brand name (they rarely are direct equals if the trade's still patented, there's some little formulation differences), and insomnia is listed as a common side effect of sertraline hydrochloride in my drug guide - the minor formulation difference between the two could be all it took to cause you to suffer from that particular effect. I'd talk to the doc for sure, and let them know what happened with the generic switch, and ask about the bioequivalency. 3nodding Edit: And then I noticed INSOMNIA isn't the problem, it's SOMNOLENCE. *facedesk* I need to sleep more. Can we trade issues, mute? crying Same advice does apply though, it's still a common side effect. Ask doc about bioequivalency between generic and name brand. 3nodding "Bioequivalency." That's going on my list of words to use and love. If I can't get in contact with my own doctor, I might consult one of the docs at the on-campus health center. And YES! I really wanna trade issues. crying If I could get up in the morning - even if it meant sleeping at midnight or one and waking up at four or five without being able to fall back asleep - I would be so happy. I want my daylight hours!
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Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2009 8:55 pm
mute_coyote "Bioequivalency." That's going on my list of words to use and love. If I can't get in contact with my own doctor, I might consult one of the docs at the on-campus health center. I became a fan this semester. 3nodding The drugs are all held to the same rigorous testing standards, but forumlation isn't always exactly the same - they're all still safe, so no worries there, but they aren't all going to show the same effects the same time. So if someone like you took Zoloft and had no side effects, then got bumped to generic and had some, that might be why. Quote: And YES! I really wanna trade issues. crying If I could get up in the morning - even if it meant sleeping at midnight or one and waking up at four or five without being able to fall back asleep - I would be so happy. I want my daylight hours! Are you sure? I went almost a month on less than 3 hours a night earlier this year. I was so tired I a**-dragged everywhere, but couldn't sleep. It was wicked miserable.
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Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2009 12:36 am
Gho the Girl erinnightwalker Gho the Girl I have a question: If everything I'm doing is fluff, should I toss it all out? is it fluff to you, or is someone telling you it is? Objectively, yes, it is fluff, going along with the definition of fluff as being something that I believe for the sake of me, not that it is this thing that objectively outside of myself exists, but that it is helpful for me. I like fluff more than Crunchy bits. ninja
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Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2009 8:44 am
Fiddlers Green Gho the Girl erinnightwalker Gho the Girl I have a question: If everything I'm doing is fluff, should I toss it all out? is it fluff to you, or is someone telling you it is? Objectively, yes, it is fluff, going along with the definition of fluff as being something that I believe for the sake of me, not that it is this thing that objectively outside of myself exists, but that it is helpful for me. I like fluff more than Crunchy bits. ninja Indubitably. But I worry that I'm doing something wrong, but then as Gho's reminding me, I worry that I'm always doing something wrong. Mayhaps I should be less insecure gonk
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