Desu Man
Running down the street, heading back from a con
No time to change, I've got my cosplay going on
Got a date tonight, and not with my hand
When I'm done with this chick, she won't be able to stand
Now it's true I'm not experienced, don't know quite how to ******** I'm pretty confident I'll have beginner's luck
I've been training nonetheless, total concentration
Don't believe all my friends, it's not masturbation
I know you won't believe it, but I'm not really a catch
During Prom I played Sonic, waiting for my Chao to hatch
Don't call me gay, I totally think girls are hot
I wiki'd them today, trying to find the G-spot
I bought a manikin, to learn how to dance
There's no point, though, I'll have her out of her pants
My Charisma's improved from several dating simulators
I'll show this girl I'm better than any vibrator
I'm finally at her house, and knocking on her door
I take a deep breath, into the lion's den I go
She opens up and she's dressed for comfort
I'm getting to excited, that I almost squirt
Once we're in her room, I push her on the bed
"What the ******** is wrong with you?" I believe she said
"Oh, s**t, sorry, I'm trying to be romantic"
When I get nervous, I come off as frantic
She shot me a weak smile, and ripped off my clothes
Then she touched my fun stuff, and I got a bleeding nose
She started jerking me off, I felt like a man
Until Seven seconds later, when I came in her hand
After a Ten minute wait, we continuted to go
I still got my virginity to lose, yo
I thrust strategically in a special way
Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A
Even in sex you can use the Konami Code
My friends tell me it helps you hold your load.
They don't know for sure, since they're all like me
That's why I had to lose my Virginity
I'm starting to get tired, how long do have to last
I hope that five minutes doesn't count as too fast
I hit the climax, as I start to cream
I loudly sing the Final Fantasy victory theme
After she finished crying, she went to hit the shower
I said "ready to go again, in a half an hour?"
But ******** that, I'm a pimp now, I told myself
There's tons of women out there so I'll spread the wealth
Before I left her house, I snatched up her thong
Picked a post on 4chan, maybe they'll write me a song
I'm a whole new man now, a magnificent sight
I'm a ******** pimp, the name's Desu man, alright.
No time to change, I've got my cosplay going on
Got a date tonight, and not with my hand
When I'm done with this chick, she won't be able to stand
Now it's true I'm not experienced, don't know quite how to ******** I'm pretty confident I'll have beginner's luck
I've been training nonetheless, total concentration
Don't believe all my friends, it's not masturbation
I know you won't believe it, but I'm not really a catch
During Prom I played Sonic, waiting for my Chao to hatch
Don't call me gay, I totally think girls are hot
I wiki'd them today, trying to find the G-spot
I bought a manikin, to learn how to dance
There's no point, though, I'll have her out of her pants
My Charisma's improved from several dating simulators
I'll show this girl I'm better than any vibrator
I'm finally at her house, and knocking on her door
I take a deep breath, into the lion's den I go
She opens up and she's dressed for comfort
I'm getting to excited, that I almost squirt
Once we're in her room, I push her on the bed
"What the ******** is wrong with you?" I believe she said
"Oh, s**t, sorry, I'm trying to be romantic"
When I get nervous, I come off as frantic
She shot me a weak smile, and ripped off my clothes
Then she touched my fun stuff, and I got a bleeding nose
She started jerking me off, I felt like a man
Until Seven seconds later, when I came in her hand
After a Ten minute wait, we continuted to go
I still got my virginity to lose, yo
I thrust strategically in a special way
Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A
Even in sex you can use the Konami Code
My friends tell me it helps you hold your load.
They don't know for sure, since they're all like me
That's why I had to lose my Virginity
I'm starting to get tired, how long do have to last
I hope that five minutes doesn't count as too fast
I hit the climax, as I start to cream
I loudly sing the Final Fantasy victory theme
After she finished crying, she went to hit the shower
I said "ready to go again, in a half an hour?"
But ******** that, I'm a pimp now, I told myself
There's tons of women out there so I'll spread the wealth
Before I left her house, I snatched up her thong
Picked a post on 4chan, maybe they'll write me a song
I'm a whole new man now, a magnificent sight
I'm a ******** pimp, the name's Desu man, alright.
-Ribbin
