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 Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 2:39 pm
JD: Frankly every time you call me a girl's name i die a little inside.
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Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 11:36 pm
Patient with computer (I can't remember the name): Why does he call you a girl's name?
J.D.: Oh, with Dr. Cox, you see, the closer he feels to someone, the more he has to push them away. So, when he calls me a girl's name, he's actually saying 'J.D., I care about you.'
Patient: Oh my god. I get it now carol carol carol carol-
J.D.: Now you're just being a jerk
*Patient continues saying 'Carol*
J.D.: Jerk, jerk JERK!
Dr. Cox: Hey newbie. I'm relatively certain that the computer is broken.
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Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 7:14 pm
Dr. Kelso:"What has two thumbs and dosent give a crap Bob Kelso have we met?"
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Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2007 11:28 pm
JD:shower shorts,for the man that has nothing to hide,but still wants to
(i think i messed that quote up but oh well)
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x_Silver Sharpie Addict_x
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Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 9:06 am
Dr. Cox: What are you doing?
J.D.: I'm making a video postcard! Do you have anything you want to say to my mom?
Dr. Cox: No, but since she's the one that brought you here... I do have a message for her uterus!
[looks into the video camera]
Dr. Cox: Bad uterus! Don't ever do that again!
This is one of my favorites!
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Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 1:35 pm
Doug: Hey Clouse. How come hamburg and Frankfurt have nothing to do with hamburgers and hot-dogs?
Janitor (Clouse) : *thick German accent* How come your Lake Titi-Caca isn't filled with boobs and poop?
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Posted: Fri Apr 20, 2007 11:54 pm
Jordan: Screw it. You know what? You're the godfather.
JD: YES. YES, YES. IN YOUR FACE! Can you name her Jennifer Dylan?
Jordan: Sure. What the hell?
JD: A-a-aah...(starts to cry)
Keith in an apron: Hawwwt cookies, everyone!
Snoop Dog Resident: I wish just once, someone would call me Ronald.
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Posted: Sat Apr 21, 2007 9:05 am
Danielle California Keith in an apron: Hawwwt cookies, everyone! I ******** LOVED that scene<33 "Why is his shirt off?"
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Posted: Sun Apr 22, 2007 7:07 am
X_FunSize_X Danielle California Keith in an apron: Hawwwt cookies, everyone! I ******** LOVED that scene<33 "Why is his shirt off?" "I don't know, Keith." JD: 23...You know what? 22 fries...22 fries. You didn't think I'd do it, did you?Elliot: JD, I don't like this. Can't we just go home and put on our PJs and watch Grey's Anatomy?
JD: Oh, I do love that show. It's like they've been watching our lives and then just...put it on TV.
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Posted: Mon Apr 30, 2007 2:31 am
Cox: I cant believe your head exploded... if your head explodes youll never make it as a doctor.. i mean cmon, you look totally ridiculous...
Todd: Id like to play Jon Madden on HER X-Box
Cox: Oh my god newbie, you couldnt be more useless unless you were infact the wall your leaning against... of course then you would be providing some jackass a wall to lean against while he reflects on how much of a jackass he is... i kno, its a canundrum, but im gonna tackle that one right up here, and in the meantime, even tho you dont have your basket Shirley, well this would be a real good time for you to skip away... skip away....
Cox: Would you like to stay, watch the game with me.. maybe, have a slice of pizza?
JD: Of course i will.
Cox: I can braid your hair.... Now i know the couch isnt very deep, but i can move the back cushion, and we can spoon....
Janitor: This, was my favorite shirt... And THIS, was my favorite skin!
Cox: Did ya go ahead and get a D.U.H. test?
Elliot: Whats a D.U.H.?
Cox: *sticks finger up nose* A DUH!!!!
John the tackleing alzheimers patient: *tackles Laverne* WHO AM I!?!
damn, on account of the lateness i gotta go to bed...
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Posted: Mon Apr 30, 2007 8:03 am
Dr Cox: Let me introduce you to, A Man Who Doesn't Care.
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Posted: Tue May 01, 2007 2:21 pm
Mostastless Cox: Would you like to stay, watch the game with me.. maybe, have a slice of pizza?
JD: Of course i will.
Cox: I can braid your hair.... Now i know the couch isnt very deep, but i can move the back cushion, and we can spoon.... Just answer this...one question.
Do you want to be the big spoon,
or the little spoon?
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Posted: Wed May 02, 2007 3:11 pm
JD: Kudos on the nice pooper.
Ron:...Thank you.
JD: Mine's firm, like mutton.
Ron:...Lovely.
Ron: So, did Sherry and Steve ever get married?
Carla: You didn't hear what happened?
JD: ((Please, say you heard))
Ron: No, I didn't.
JD: ((Damn you, Ron))
Carla: Steve took a year off to take care of his parents and while he was gone, Sherry started seeing Dr. Hardy.
JD: *sarcastic* Naaaaaw.
Ron: Really?
Carla: Yes.
Ron: Sherry and Gary?
JD: ((*sarcastic* Naaaaaw.))
Carla: Yes!...But, that summer, they took a river-rafting trip through the Grand Canyon and they both drowned.
JD: Oh, thank God...
Carla and Ron: .........
JD:...You know, 'cuz they...they both died doing what they loved.........Rafting...
Elliot: I don't get it. I've run every single test. I cannot figure out why this guy is in so much pain.
Cox: Did you run a D.U.H. test?
Elliot: What's a D.U.H.?
Cox: "Uh duuuuuh". The guy is a drug addict trying to score pain killers.
Elliot: But...he refused drugs.
Cox: UGH, MY BAD. He is a very clever drug addict.
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Posted: Wed May 02, 2007 3:14 pm
J.D. (singing): It's a beautiful mornin'!
(Scene shows Laverne's funeral)
Carla: J.D.!
J.D.: Sorry, I was thinking about something else.
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x_Silver Sharpie Addict_x
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Posted: Thu May 03, 2007 1:29 pm
Dr. Kelso: [drunk at Turk and Carlas wedding reception] Ahh, Dr. Turkleton!
Chris Turk: Actually, sir, it's Turk.
Dr. Kelso: That's your first name!
Chris Turk: You think my name is Turk Turkleton?
Dr. Kelso: [to Carla] ... and Mrs. Turkleton! The Turkletons! Hehehe...
[to bartender]
Dr. Kelso: Give me a scotch.
Dr. Cox: I'm gonna go ahead and give you back one of these Man Cards. You deserve it.
J.D.: Wow... Wanna hug?
Dr. Cox: [taking the card back] You held on to it as long as you could, didn't you?
Dr. Cox: I went ahead and took the liberty of making you five Man Cards. Hold them very dear, because every time you drop the ball, man-wise, I'm going to take one from you.
J.D.: I don't need your approval, or your stupid Man Cards! Although the lettering is darling. Have you ever done calligraphy?
Dr. Cox: [snatching one of the cards] Thank you.
J.D.: Dammit!
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