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 Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 8:25 am
I suppose that over the years, numerous aspects of my interests and personality just kept morphing and building up to develop into the person I am today.
As a child I had few friends, but those who I did have were very close to me.. hell, I've known my best friend for at least nine years now!
Anyways, my best friend, Ali, really did help to shape my taste in fashion early on. As children, we spent a lot of time at her grandmother's house. Her grandmother had a collection of old encyclopedias that we used to pour through. We would look at all of the pictures, of animals, of people from different cultures, of palaces, and whatnot. However, one section was of particular interest to both of us, and that section was a series of images depicting fashion from different nations and different time periods. While most little girls would have adored light flowy dresses, or vibrantly coloured peices, I gravitated twoards darkly-coloured medieval clothing. The long swooping sleeves and the exquisite detail of such dresses fascinated me! Though at the time this interest seemed like a mere childhood fancy, it was to later come back into my life in quite a potent manner.
As I grew up I think the most important thing which led me to gravitate twoards the gothic subculture was my personality and my set of ideals. These interests were things which I developed on my own over teh years, and as I would find out later, were closely linked to the ideals of the romantic movement of the early nineteenth century. Later I came to see goth as a form of romanticism. (If one examines the nineteenth century breeds of goth and romanticism, they were very closely linked.) However, this fact in itself did not lead me to gothdom.
One of my early turning points was in middle school, when my older brother was going through his 'goth' phase. He introduced me to Evanescance, and later, when he got out of that stage, gave me an old CD titled 'The Best of Gothic Radio'. Those two factors helped lead me to appreciate, and later end up loving, gothic music (though Evanescance really isn't goth rock.... but they still have some nice songs! ^_^)
I believe that what really changed me was my freshman year of high school. I by then had developed a fascination with gothic fashion. It was also during that year that I finally found a group of friends who accepted me for who I was, and finally had the confidence to dress and act as I pleased instead of submissively try (and fail) to fit in as I had done through elementary and middle school. Over the summer between my freshman and sophmore years of high school I began to bloom into who I am today. I began finding clothing which I liked more than the kakhis and old navy t-shirts I had been wearing prior to then. I began to express myself, and who I was so much more. Over the next year I began adjusting to living my life the way I wanted to. I began crawling out of the shell I had hidden in for so many years. But as hard as it was to do that, it felt wonderful! I no longer had to try and appease my peers, only to run home at the end of the day and cry. With my newfound confidence, and ability to shine as who I was, I was so much more comfortable, and I felt so much more like me. Now, as I'm about to go into my senior year of high school, I'm just so happy and so comfortable with who I am. The crazy, beautiful, eccentric, artistic, and romantic woman that I am...
I suppose that, at heart, I had been a goth for years, but it took quite a while before I began to dress or act the part.
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Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 8:53 am
In 6th grade I changed schools and met a girl named Sammy, and she got me into rock/metal/screamo etc. The attitude and clothes were soon to follow,lol.
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Posted: Mon Jun 25, 2007 3:27 pm
(*The following is Dray's summary of his life*)
I was intrested in dark things since childhood but was ashamed of that because people told me it was wrong. Then I was sent to Catholic school are re-thought everything I was ever told. Shortly before this my life started falling apart and I soon became manic-depressive. I moved schools three more times (a total of seven moves) and this one was the first large school I went to in years. I found a small group of almost-friends that disbanded quickly leaving me alone in a lunchroom one day. Some jock pestered me and scared him off with a few well chosen cuss words. A second later I heard this:
"Um...um...Are you all right?" I looked up and a 15 or 16 year old girl in big black pants and a My Chemical Romance hoodie that was way too big for her was chewing on her thumbnail (painted black) and looking like she was going to freak out. And for some reason she had a black and green patchwork cat plushie in her other hand. I swear she would have started crying for an ambulance if I had said "no".
"You should ignore them they're dumb. D'ya wanna sit with us?"
I declined. I was 12 and never seen a Gothic person up close. I was intrigued by her so, being myself, I researched Gothic culture.
And that led me here to pester you all! heart
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Posted: Wed Jun 27, 2007 6:02 pm
I never really noticed I was goth until just over a year ago. I knew I was into some weird stuff (like the occult and such), I stood out a lot, and I do have a pretty ******** up home life (which is definently the main cause).
Now I'm very proud of the fact that I am goth. ^_^
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Posted: Thu Jul 05, 2007 12:03 pm
i'm not goth i'm emo, but anyway, i'm emo cuz of 2 reasons, my mom and my true love. i'll start out with the true love thing. we were friends, nothing more. then i noticed i liked him,but i didn't kno if he felt the same way....then i knew he didn't. he had to go and ditch me and hangout with his better friends! leaving me, with a shattered heart in my hands.....
and with my mom, i hate her so much.... if i don't do something perfectly then she'd yell at me! and when i'm bad she beats me on the butt with a belt(ouchy!).
it was all their fault that i'm a depressed cutting freak now! crying i believe it's like this, true love caused the depression and cutting, and mom caused the sensitivity, low self esteem, and black soul.
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Posted: Thu Jul 19, 2007 9:01 pm
The Baroness...I'm not exactly sure how I became a "goth". I am usually surrounded by people who look down on goths and wore pastel colours. What makes it even more peculiar is that I am born of strict, proper, chinese parents. I used to hate the colour black too.
Sometime around seventh or eighth grade, I suddenly loved the colour black and the combination of black and red. It just happened. Then, I started buying more and more black and/or red clothing. My views on fashion changed. Before I was the all pastels no darks but now, I am mostly all darks no lights. Which is pretty surprising.
After I moved during seventh grade to a place three cities away, I became "emo". Which was funny because I was a pretty happy kid. That was when I became totally involved in the "gothic scene". I still don't look like a "full-fledged" goth since my parents would rather die than see me looking like that and forbid me to wear "stuff like that" exept on Halloween. The only thing that people can judge me as goth is my makeup and hair. Clothing is just a bit on the dark side.
Damn, that was long...... has spoken
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Posted: Fri Aug 03, 2007 8:36 pm
I became a goth because I like the holw thing.Style,culture,people.I always was drawn to the darker side of life.I really like Death,I started to like the goth stuff when I was eight.But my parents didnt let me where my own crap so I had to deal.when I was ten I started to get a bit (mentally)crazy.At twelve I was wearing all black and some grey.now im 13 and I wear black with:red,green,blue,purple(like stitching color on tripp pant for example).Im into goth music,death metal.satanic music.lot of crud.anyways I always like the darkest side of the room,if you will.You know what pisses me off?When your parents tell you "oh its just a phase you'll get over it".
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Posted: Sun Aug 12, 2007 9:07 pm
Here's my story.
I have never felt like I could fit in with the people my age around where I live. They were always making fun of me, saying I was ugly or I needed my hair done and stuff like that. They even pick on me for the fact that I like anime and Japanese stuff.
But then one day when I went to Cedar Point I saw a group of goths and I was mesmerized by them. They looked happy even though some people were pointing and whispering things about them. I was kinda scared of getting on one of the rides and they offered to get on with me when I said that nobody wanted to get on with me.
I kept my interest in the goth sub-culture under wraps until my junior year of high school when I befriended a freshman who was a goth. Then I happily let that be known, but there were problems.
People at my school would call us witches and ask us if we worshipped the devil and all sorts of stuff like that, and I didn't care. I stopped caring what people think a long time ago.
I guess that's all.
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Posted: Tue Nov 13, 2007 10:01 am
don't get any big ideas, they're not going to happen...I are necroing thread!
I think my turning point was when my mother shot herself. That was... christ, 11 years ago? She survived, but ever since then I was afraid of, therefore fascinated by pain and death, and all that can be beautiful in it. This was exacerbated the following year, when I hit puberty and had all those lovely teenage hormones kicking my face in the dirt. The only way I survived those years was by celebrating the hurt.
But... I wasn't part of the music scene back then, so goth punk, I was not. I filtered through grrl rock, indie, emo-indie, things like that. Goth Romanticist, by way of the old old old literary movement... that's where I squeezed my way in -- the mind without the music. Some people say that counts... others say Bauhaus or GTFO. I'm not bothered either way.
Didn't actually get into the music until about three years ago. Went to Scotland to visit my boyf, and yeah... kind of got thrown into the cyber/graver scene through his friends. And loved it. And I love going back to them... they're such awesome people 4laugh
So... yep. That'd be my story. ...you'll go to hell for what your dirty mind is thinking.
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Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2007 12:00 pm
It all started with vampire books and trouble with parents. I guess I just stopped caring what everyone thought and I even influenced some other people to like vampires. The "gothic" stuff was just my way of standing coping with everything and annoying my parents to [insert word here].
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Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2007 8:11 pm
I just... didn't like being so very normal-looking and acting. (Yes. I know, I know. There's no such thing as "normal" really. But it sure seemed that way.) I hated how everything seemed to be the same story with different people. It was a broken record; playing the same song over and over. I just put on a different record. I hate to be bored. Besides the style is just... fitting.
: )
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Posted: Sat Mar 08, 2008 11:19 am
Don't know, don't remember, don't care. Haha.
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Posted: Sat Mar 15, 2008 2:55 am
For me, I think on some level, I always was. Even when I was a little kid, my favorite movies weren't crap like.... oh, I don't know, Cars and Open Season (they weren't out then, I know. It's an example), they were Nightmare Before Christmas, Night of the Living Dead, so on. I've always been a dark, dark little boy. I laugh when people are crushed by Lifesavers trucks. I once wrote a paper on my dream house in fifth grade....... cracked stone, chains and torches hanging from the ceiling, coffin for a bed, you get the idea (I still want that damn house). Always wore dark colors, couple years ago just stuck with all black. Wrote weird stories, the hero usually ended up either being dead or evil in the end. Edgar Allen Poe was my frickin' idol since elementary. Basically, I've always been. Just recently realized it, though.
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Posted: Sat Mar 15, 2008 11:27 am
I had a scary moment of clarity a few days ago, and I think that right now I will be able to tell my story a little better.
I won't lie, I grew up in a perfect world and I have a perfect family who has never beaten me in my life. I was a perfectly happy child who loved colors and being outside and doing all the useless little things that useless little kids do.
When I was ((oh god, how long ago again?)) twelve, I think it was, one of my older cousins let me read her JTHM book, and I laughed my fool head off. At around the same time my best friends backstabbed and completely turned their backs on me ((for reasons still unknown)) which sent me into a series of major depressions. Needless to say, that is what got the ball rolling.
I was a terrible little poser baby for the first year or so, but after that I started to get the hang of this new strange style that I had taken up. I started making a lot of my own clothing because I often lacked money and a means of transportation to get to the nearest clothing store. The results were horrible at first, but I think I have significantly improved.
My parents have always been relatively okay with all of this. As long as I don't look like a sleaze, it's fine with them. In their eyes, it is their job to encourage my creativity.
I thought myself a fine little goth, until last week.
I'd rather not share exactly what happened ((it was not very pleasant)), but I realize now that I am not actually goth. I'm just not. Endofstory. I have been wearing more and more color in the past three months or so, and rather enjoy mixing them together. I don't think I'll ever give up my black, but I no longer enjoy wearing it all the time. Don't worry, Angels, I don't ever plan to give up this guild either. I still listen to metal and industrial and godknowswhatelse, and I still am considered "more than a little wierd". >.<
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Posted: Sun May 04, 2008 6:55 am
Well my Mum was sort of punky, Dad was a biker, I ended up listning to their music at a VERY young age...when I got to about 11 I started realising how much I loved the gothic look...I started as kinda a punky goth...and now I just change everyday. ^^ One day i'll be in my New Rocks, corset and wearing about 6 belts and the next i'm more Lolitaish.
I always really knew I dressed different to the other kids... sweatdrop
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