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 Posted: Sun Sep 18, 2005 12:30 am
so my life like totally sucks right now my ex keeps showing up at random times and that is really messing with my head also all of my friends have boyfriends and i cannot seem to find anybody to be with i thought this one guy that i met at karoke might be interested, but that turned on me tonight when he showed up with a girl and totally ignored me she didn't even seem very friendly and she made faces at people while they were singing i dunno maybe i was just jealous or something i really wish that i could have talked to him before tonight and found out if he was interested i really need a guy i have been single for six months now and i am really getting tired of it but on a happy note i finally(after nine months) found a job YAY!!!!!!!!!!! well i guess thats all for right now but i'll keep you all posted on the man search sorry i haven't been on in a while i've been kinda busy with my daughter and all the bs with her dad thanks for letting me rant
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Posted: Mon Sep 19, 2005 10:28 pm
I have been so depresed about not being able to have children.
I thought I had come to terms with it, but it seems that everytime I see my little niece who would be the same age as mine and Kirks oldest, had we been able to concive when we started, I just brake into tears. I'm not sure what to do about it.
On a happy note. Kirk and I went to the Civil War days, up at camp Floyd!
It was fantastic. Everyone thier is so wonderful, and are so kind to me.
I am so happy that we have gotten involved in it.
And I talked with my friend Tracey, she is going to be able to sew my dress by the end of October, which means I can go to the Christmas Ball in my new dress!
Sweet! now all I need to do is learn how they danced in the 1800's.
heart
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Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 8:59 pm
Dear GGG Journal,
Wow! Yesterday was crazy. About 3am I woke up, and within minutes the electricty went out. I could see the trees outside the window blowing around...hear the wind. It was really freaking me out. It was a long time before I got back to sleep.
In the morning, around 8, I wake up. There's a tree down across the street...it fell the opposite direction from where my boyfriend's mom's car was. She evacuated here from Lake Charles. They're so lucky that the tree went that way...it didn't hit a house either, luckily. My roommate and I went walking, barefoot, to survey the damage. The actual storm wouldn't be hitting us till around 5, but we knew that some damage had already happened.
I finally got to meet the neighbors...Most of them are pretty cool. We built a campfire in the front yard, which we're not suposed to do because #1 we're in the city limits, #2 we're in the Historic District, and #3, the landlady for hte apartments would have had a cow. We ended up cooking burgers over the fire, and drinking. There is one neighbor who is a professional cellist, and he played for us, and we had a blast drinking and eating in the rain, and talking. Even after the electricty came back on, around 11:30, we turned the lights back out and partied more! Then we came in, lit up the hookah with some strawberry and some vanilla tobacco. I taught one girl to read tarot, and we just had a wonderful time.
And I'm going to get that tree that fell turned into a cedar chest to store clothes in! Tomorrow I'm going to try to find an open sawmill and get it planed, and my roommate works at the prison, and the inmates can build it for me!
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 10:47 am
Malkut Dear GGG Journal, Wow! Yesterday was crazy. About 3am I woke up, and within minutes the electricty went out. I could see the trees outside the window blowing around...hear the wind. It was really freaking me out. It was a long time before I got back to sleep. In the morning, around 8, I wake up. There's a tree down across the street...it fell the opposite direction from where my boyfriend's mom's car was. She evacuated here from Lake Charles. They're so lucky that the tree went that way...it didn't hit a house either, luckily. My roommate and I went walking, barefoot, to survey the damage. The actual storm wouldn't be hitting us till around 5, but we knew that some damage had already happened. I finally got to meet the neighbors...Most of them are pretty cool. We built a campfire in the front yard, which we're not suposed to do because #1 we're in the city limits, #2 we're in the Historic District, and #3, the landlady for hte apartments would have had a cow. We ended up cooking burgers over the fire, and drinking. There is one neighbor who is a professional cellist, and he played for us, and we had a blast drinking and eating in the rain, and talking. Even after the electricty came back on, around 11:30, we turned the lights back out and partied more! Then we came in, lit up the hookah with some strawberry and some vanilla tobacco. I taught one girl to read tarot, and we just had a wonderful time. And I'm going to get that tree that fell turned into a cedar chest to store clothes in! Tomorrow I'm going to try to find an open sawmill and get it planed, and my roommate works at the prison, and the inmates can build it for me! what a wonderful way to enjoy nature! i'm glad you're all safe, and totally glad you were able to turn it into such a fun event!
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 5:43 pm
GGG,
my dad thinks i'm sleeping with my ex. well, i am sleeping with my ex, but literally. my dad thinks i've been sleeping with him figuratively. i don't bother correcting anyone anymore. no one believes me, anyway. it's rather irritating. however, i've agreed to stay with another friend when we are out there, as a compromise. it will be a bit less convenient, but what can you do, eh?
we had fun this weekend, maybe will go again this weekend. *shrugs*
now watching the 2003 version of peter pan, and chuy's eating kettle corn. mmmmmmmmm................... kettle corn..................... domokun
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Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 7:26 pm
GGG,
also,
whee YAY!!! I'm Tinkerbell! whee
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Posted: Mon Oct 03, 2005 1:09 pm
Dear GGG,
This morning the power went out at my house for a couple of hours. I was bored for a while and it got really cold. I'm fine now. I'm gald i have this place where i can talk and be heard, i often get ignored at home.
That's all for now.
Kisa
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Posted: Wed Oct 05, 2005 3:24 pm
GGG,
OMFG, like today was totally like, the BEST! omg, seriously, it was like, totally kickin.
no, really, today rocked. first, i was late to my appointment that if i missed it i was gonna have my free childcare taken away, but the guy let me come in anyway and take all the tests. then, while we were at lunch, dillard's (at the mall) called to set up an interview today at 4, which i couldn't go to cuz of chuy's daycare, so then she said 2. i couldn't go to that cuz of the tests not being over (stupid dhs, they're trying to help me get a job, but won't let me leave the line-drawing test to go to a job interview). but she said i can go at 2:30. the last test we took, seriously, was they had a whole page full of > <> <> <> <> <> <> <> <> <> < and i had to draw lines from point to point so it looked like this >--<>--<>--<>--<>--<>--<, only i couldn't draw one line through all of them, it had to be separate lines connecting each point with the point that followed it. there was a whole page, and we had five minutes to do as many as we could. and for this, i was late to my job interview. of course, i didn't have time to go home and change out of my tank top and jean skirt, so i had to run into old navy and buy a skirt and shirt for $55 that i am so not keeping, those greedy bastards, and i had to wear my 3" platform heel sandals in the rain. oh yeah, it's been raining since about noon. so i was late, but the lady interviewed me anyway. then i went and bought a polish sausage with relish, onions, ketchup, cheese, and mustard and a pineapple smoothie. they were so effing good. i had to cover the food on my way to the car cuz of the rain, so i got a little damp. then i had to change in my car in the parking lot so i didn't mess up the clothes i'm gonna return, and i left my smoothie on top of the car. most people would have lost it, but i drive slowly like you're supposed to in a parking lot, so when i remembered and stopped the car, my smoothie was totally still there, and still delicious. then on my way to tell papi about the interview and pick up my son, the radio played metallica, then ozzy, then sublime, then foo fighters, and by the time i got home i was ready to dance naked in the rain, i was so happy. i didn't, though, cuz i have the sniffles already.
it was such an awesome day!!! everything went wrong and still turned out perfectly!
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Posted: Wed Oct 05, 2005 8:19 pm
Dear GGGJ,
Alright...I'm confused. When I was originally hired for this job I was told I'd be teaching Juniors mostly, with a senior class or two. So the week before school starts I'm told I'll be teaching mostly 9th graders, with one GEE (graduate exit exam) remedial class. Not what I'd hoped for, I'm let down...but okay.
Two weeks later they take away my GEE class and give me an English IV class.
And today I'm told that because I've got 30 sophomores in my English I (Out of 127 students, 25 of which are actually 8th grade because they didn't pass iLEAP) I have to QUIT teaching the curriculum for 9th grade and start teaching the English II curriculum!?!?!?!
WTF!?!!? (mate)
RAHHHHHHHHHH!
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Posted: Sat Oct 08, 2005 9:32 pm
Malkut Dear GGGJ, Alright...I'm confused. When I was originally hired for this job I was told I'd be teaching Juniors mostly, with a senior class or two. So the week before school starts I'm told I'll be teaching mostly 9th graders, with one GEE (graduate exit exam) remedial class. Not what I'd hoped for, I'm let down...but okay. Two weeks later they take away my GEE class and give me an English IV class. And today I'm told that because I've got 30 sophomores in my English I (Out of 127 students, 25 of which are actually 8th grade because they didn't pass iLEAP) I have to QUIT teaching the curriculum for 9th grade and start teaching the English II curriculum!?!?!?! WTF!?!!? (mate) RAHHHHHHHHHH! well, take a nap, then FIRE THE MISSILES!
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Posted: Tue Oct 18, 2005 10:45 pm
Dear GGG,
Today was a good day. I didn't watch too much tv, I practiced drawing (I'm getting a lot better) and in the evening I went on a double date with my friends. We played pool and air hockey, then went out to eat and talked for over an hour. It was so much fun.
heart heart Kisa
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Posted: Wed Oct 19, 2005 5:15 pm
GGG,
i start my new job tomorrow, at applebee's. it should be fun.
hallowe'en is fast approaching. i have beads for my flapper dress, finally, and shoes. i wish i could find a headband or at least a wig, and chuy has his spiderman costume already.
i'm watching crybaby. i love this movie, but the cable box keeps screwing up and it's pissing me off.
we went and saw chuy's dad this weekend. we satyed the night at a friend's house. actually, i was friends with his sister first, then when he was a freshman in my senior year, we had latin class together. she's in college now, but we hung out with him and his parents. it was fun. we had a great weekend.
oh yeah, and tomorrow is my gaianniversary!
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Posted: Wed Oct 19, 2005 8:50 pm
*screams in stress-filled pissiness*
That being done...Dear GGG,
Today has been one of THOSE days.
Started off, with my seniors...Yesterday they were suposed to do group research, then separately write a one page report on the topic they had researched. Only about half the class bothered to do it. That's 50% of a test grade! The second half of the project is for them to create a visual of some sort that will explain, describe, portray, whatever...the topic, and to do a presentation. This section is group work. I found out this morning at about 7:45 (school starts at 7:50) that I had an IEP meeting at 8:30. IEP's are Individualized Education Plans for special ed (on both ends of the spectrum) students. Normally, unless I was THE specified teacher, I wouldn't mind, but this student was decidedly in need of some changes, and I wanted to give my input. So I drag my seniors down to another teacher's class (it happened to be the special ed teacher, as she has an aid who can watch my students, and the posterboard is in her room, as are a ton of markers) and told my students to be good, and that this was the only time I'd give them to work on this. I reminded them that it was for a test grade, and they would be presenting tomorrow.
When I stopped back by the door on my way to pick up something I'd forgotten in the classroom, only TWO of them (one group) were working!
The IEP itself was a terrible hassle. This young student, whom I shall call Jason, to keep things simple, yet not use his name, is emotionally disturbed. He has chemical imballances, and tends to act out in class. He often refuses to do his work, ESPECIALLY if he is put into pairs, or if the work involves releasing information about himself. That being said, this student is BRILLIANT! I would NOT be surprised in the least if he had a genius IQ.
On another note, I can also easily see him bringing a gun to school and blowing us all away.
So today was the meeting. There were three regular ed teachers there, the special ed, the school counselor, his personal counselor, the parish (county) special ed worker, and one of the young man's relatives.
I know know why he acts the way he does. SHE is a horrendous wretch of a woman, and has NO business raising him. She uses visits with his favored parent as a reward or punishment. If he's good, he can visit with the parent, if he is not, then he is not allowed to.
She does NOT want him to recieve ANY sort of special acomadations, yet has said that if he has another outburst she will send him away to the mental detention center. He has recently gotten on medication, which is helping a good bit. But she sat there and stressed to each of us, in front of his face, that she's given up hope in him, and that she's ready to get rid of him.
She also said something else that REALLY pissed off the psychologist in me (that was my baccelors degree). She said that he was refusing to think about all the good things in his life, which was causing him to be depressed. BULL! If he's on medication, then it means that the depression is CHEMICAL, and that the depression is causing him to not be able to focus on the good in life. I've been there. I know SO many others who have. *screams again*
So, three class periods later (that I missed...and have no clue what my students actually did during those hours...they were suposed to be looking up an internet source for their research paper that's due next Friday, but I'll believe they actually were when pigs fly) the confrence is over. It's my planning hour, so I go run make copies and have some private talk with the special ed teacher, who has become a dear friend of mine over the past few weeks. She, of course, vented. I, then, vented. Another teacher who had been there and had to leave early, vented.
I went to the computer lab I was scheduled to be in for my fifth hour class (as our school has no REAL computer lab, but instead several classrooms, that you have to hopefully catch the teacher on an off period to be able to use the computers). My class showed up, I explained what they were to do. There were not enough computers for students, none of them were on task, several had not picked their TOPICS yet for the paper, and they were all-around being a mess. In FRONT of the other teacher. I was mortified.
The next bit was lunch. I was rushed having to try to print out this, copy that, and got to eat about half of a can of soup before the bell rang and I had to run to the other classroom agian. About that time I remembered that during 4th hour another class comes into my room, and I'd had my door shut and locked. *smacks self in head*
That class was pretty good. There were several people who couldn't get "you have to write about a current event" through their heads, so finally I told them to go to cnn.com and pick a headline, and that was what they were to write about. This class was far better behaved, though.
Bell rings. Break. 10 minutes of recess, basically. I trudge down to the other room. Jason, the student from earlier, drops by, and we have a very good talk. It was a very uplifting little bit. Then the bell rings again, and in comes my class. Note...these are my VERY WORST students.
First thing out of two of their mouths were "Can I go to the bathroom?!?!" NO! You just walked in from break! "But we went to your other room first, then came here!" How does that change the fact that you just spent 10 minutes doing nothing?
Besides, they know that in order to leave the room to go to the bathroom, they have to have a bathroom pass, which they must EARN by going a week without breaking a rule. Finally they borrow bathroom passes from other students, go, come back...There aren't enough computers for everyone to have one, and though they were relativly new laptops, they were pretty pitiful. And the students started complaining. I let a few go down to another teacher's room, given that they take a note down for her to initial saying that they were ONLY allowed to do this reasearch, and NOTHING else. The other students complained that they didn't get to go. I told them that if they were displeased with the fact that I was taking my class time to let them do this research, instead of (as I did last time) making them do it ALL on their own time, I could easily bring them all back to the classroom and find something more productive to do. Oh no! Of course not! At one point I had to drag the counselor in to threaten them. Only with him, it's not a threat. He's a former Marine, and will do what he says he will do. That quieted them for a bit, but by the time school was out (and I'd been called for a meeting with the principal) they were bouncing off the walls again. And only two had done ANY research.
I go to the principal. There's a student whose mother does not think her grade was averaged correctly. Our gradebook is online, and works like this:
Tests are averaged.
Non-tests are averaged.
Those two scores are averaged.
This young lady, though having all 90's and above on her assignments, had a 0 on one of her "test" grades (I give essays instead of tests) due to plagerism. That had pulled her test grade to an F when averaged, which pulled her whole grade to a D when averaged the second time. But now I get to do it over by hand, to get the same answer.
I also had a meeting with the Superintendant today. I found out about this yesterday when I got buzzed down from the office and told to call the schoolboard. So I check with my carpool and make sure it's alright that I leave for a bit, then come back to get them. That's cool. Go to the school board, and the first thing she pulls out at me is that I forgot to email her my behavior plan. Which had been mentioned at the beginning of a four hour meeting a week ago, BEFORE parent teacher confrences. I'd forgotten. I promised her I'd email it as soon as I got home, which I did. Then she sprang on me the fact that one of my test scores from the teachers' certification exams (PRAXIS) had gone to the State Department of Education with the wrong SSN on it, and that the State Department would not give me my license unless I got it fixed, and that the School Board had a November 1 deadline for this, so if I didn't get it fixed and QUICKLY then I was out of a job.
To add to that, my roommate is 6 weeks pregnant, which is a good thing, she's very excited, as is her fiance. However, as our lease is up in December, and I know they're going to want to live together (duh) that means I'm likely out of a place to live. I work about 30 minutes from where I live, and moving closer would be nice, but I don't know anyone there, the town is TINY, and my boyfriend (who I almost consider my fiance...he calls me his husband sometimes) lives next door to where I live now, and I don't want to loose that. But his lease is until May, so he couldn't move with me, even if that were totally feasable, which it's not, with him working a MUCH lower paying job, and going to school, and my parents being very prudish and not believing girls and boys should live together.
I don't know anyone else around here to room with. I don't know of a PLACE to move by myself. And I REALLY don't want to move back in with my dad. I've had to do that with my mom already last year.
*breaks down crying again*
I think I'm done. Thanks for letting me rant.
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Posted: Wed Oct 19, 2005 9:09 pm
WOW Malkut. I read the whole thing, and I have to say that though I knew it was challenging being a teacher, I had absolutely no idea it was so complicated. eek I'm so sorry you have such ungrateful little prats for students, but it's ok, because the world will bite them in the a**, HARD, once they graduate, -if they manage that that is- and you can move on to better uses of your time. evil
As for the moving thing, May isn't all *that* far away, what kind of place does he have? You two could bunk, surely, if you think it wouldn't ruin your relationship then to hell with other people's 'moral' opinions, because they're just that, opinions. They don't matter nearly as much as your happiness and the possibility of somewhere to live.
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Posted: Wed Oct 19, 2005 9:17 pm
Thanks. Most days teaching isn't bad at all, but some days it just all hits at once. The particular student I was speaking of is a HUGE disruption most of the time, banging his head on desks, throwing tantrums (sometimes self-injuriously) when he doesn't get his way, etc. But he's a sweet kid, and I want to help him. I've lived with people like him. I know how to deal with them, and he's actually one of my favorites. Especially now that I see what he has to deal with. The poor guy SNEAKS out of his window and to the kitchen in the morning to get breakfast, so he doesn't have to pass the living room where his grandfather is, because he's scared he'll get beaten! And the others he lives with aren't much better.
As for the living situation, my boyfriend lives right next door in the same apartment complex. There's neither room for my stuff, nor would we be able to do that without breaking the terms of his lease. I'm sure we'd do fine living together. I do, however, greatly respect and value my mother's opinions, and I know that it would tear her up for me to be living with a guy. I'm willing to put up with a measure of difficulty to keep her happy, it's worth that much to me.
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