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 Posted: Sat Dec 11, 2004 2:23 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 11, 2004 2:48 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 11, 2004 3:12 pm
 no wonder they're so cheap... confused
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Posted: Tue Dec 14, 2004 4:00 am
One day a nun was standing on the side of the road waiting for a cab. A cab stopped and picked her up. During the ride she noticed that the driver was staring at her.
When she asked him why, he said, "I want to ask you something, but I don't want to offend you."
She said, "You can't offend me. I have been a nun long enough that I have heard just about everything."
The cab driver then said, "Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun give me a blow job."
She said, "Well, perhaps we can work something out under two conditions. You have to be single, and you have to be Catholic."
Immediately the cab driver said, "Oh, yes! I'm single and I'm Catholic!"
The nun said, "Okay, pull into that alley."
The cab driver pulled into the alley and the nun went to work. Shortly afterwards, the cab driver started crying.
The nun said, "My child, what's the matter?"
He said tearfully, "Sister, I have sinned. I lied, I lied...I'm married and I'm Jewish!"
The nun replied, "That's okay. My name's Bruce and I'm on my way to a costume party!"
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Posted: Tue Dec 14, 2004 4:02 am
angelx1702 One day a nun was standing on the side of the road waiting for a cab. A cab stopped and picked her up. During the ride she noticed that the driver was staring at her. When she asked him why, he said, "I want to ask you something, but I don't want to offend you." She said, "You can't offend me. I have been a nun long enough that I have heard just about everything." The cab driver then said, "Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun give me a blow job." She said, "Well, perhaps we can work something out under two conditions. You have to be single, and you have to be Catholic." Immediately the cab driver said, "Oh, yes! I'm single and I'm Catholic!" The nun said, "Okay, pull into that alley." The cab driver pulled into the alley and the nun went to work. Shortly afterwards, the cab driver started crying. The nun said, "My child, what's the matter?" He said tearfully, "Sister, I have sinned. I lied, I lied...I'm married and I'm Jewish!" The nun replied, "That's okay. My name's Bruce and I'm on my way to a costume party!" lolol
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Posted: Tue Dec 14, 2004 7:03 pm
trust me i got more if u wanna read em
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Posted: Tue Dec 14, 2004 7:48 pm
One morning, a bum wakes up hornier than he had ever been in his life. He looked in his pockets and found forty cents, and decided to go to the local whorehouse.
He goes inside where a lady greeted him. He said, "Here's all the money I have. I don't care how ugly she is, I just need to get some."
She takes his money and sends him into a room. The only things in the room were a table and a chicken.
He says, "No way, I'm not going to ******** a chicken." But after a few minutes, that chicken started to look pretty good. So he grabbed it, screwed it, and left.
The next morning, he wakes up just as horny as he had been the day before. He goes back to the whorehouse.
The same lady greets him, and he says, "Look, I don't have any money today, but can you help me out?"
She says, "No money, huh? I'll tell you what, go upstairs and take the first door on the left."
He goes upstairs and into the room. There is a circular hole in the floor and there are all these guys looking down through it, beating off.
He looks down into the hole and sees a man screwing a dog.
He says, "How can you get off on that? That's sick!"
And one of the men says, "That's nothing. Yesterday, there was a guy in there ******** a chicken!"
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Posted: Thu Dec 16, 2004 4:41 am
This guy walks into a bar and two steps in, he realizes it's a gay bar. "But what the heck," he says, "I really want a drink."
When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the customer, "What's the name of your p***s?"
The customer says, "Look, I'm not into any of that. All I want is a drink."
The gay waiter says, "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your p***s. Mine for instance is called 'Nike,' for the slogan, 'Just Do It.' That guy down at the end of the bar calls his 'Snickers,' because 'It really Satisfies."
The customer looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over. The customer asks the man sitting to his left, who is sipping on a beer, "Hey bud, what's the name of your p***s?"
The man looks back and says with a smile, "TIMEX."
The thirsty customer asks, "Why Timex?"
The fella proudly replies, "Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin!"
A little shaken, the customer turns to the fella on his right, who is sipping a fruity Margarita and says, "So, what do you call your p***s?"
The man turns to him and proudly exclaims, "FORD, because 'Quality is Job 1.' " Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford, lately?"
Even more shaken, the customer has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name for his p***s. Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, "The name of my p***s is 'Secret.' Now give me my beer."
The bartender begins to pour the customer a beer, but with a puzzled look asks, "Why secret?"
The customer says, "Because it's STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!"
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Posted: Sat Dec 25, 2004 6:58 am
yo mama is so fat her truck is made out of spandex blaugh
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Posted: Thu Dec 30, 2004 4:56 pm
this is a dead baby joke.
this joke is only good while ppl are drinking something and laughing.
--while laughing-- hey, wann know how many dead babies I can fit into my car?
(wait for the ppl to ask how many....)
then you suddenly stop laughing and say:
17
it'll work. if it doesn't..well you said it wrong.
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Posted: Thu Dec 30, 2004 5:29 pm
santa, the easter bunny, the prefect guy, and a old women are walking down the street. they all spot a 100 doller bill on the ground ....who gets to it first?
the old woman, the other three don't exsist.
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Posted: Thu Dec 30, 2004 6:06 pm
la de da santa, the easter bunny, the prefect guy, and a old women are walking down the street. they all spot a 100 doller bill on the ground ....who gets to it first?
the old woman, the other three don't exsist. hee hee ^.^
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Posted: Thu Dec 30, 2004 7:23 pm
A man challenges Tiger woods to a game of golf for $50,000. Tiger woods accepts and so they walk to the green. The guy stops and says that cause hes a beginner he gets one handicap, Tiger accepts. The guy says he gets three "gotchas." Tiger a little confused say "ok" and begins to swing right as his club goes down the man reach down and grabs tigers nuts yelling "gotcha!" Ofcourse Tiger misses. THey go off and then come back after the game. The man had won. WHen Tiger was asked how he could have lost he replied with, "Do you know how hard it is to play golf knowing there are two more "gotchas" coming.
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Posted: Thu Dec 30, 2004 7:36 pm
Lune-ri A man challenges Tiger woods to a game of golf for $50,000. Tiger woods accepts and so they walk to the green. The guy stops and says that cause hes a beginner he gets one handicap, Tiger accepts. The guy says he gets three "gotchas." Tiger a little confused say "ok" and begins to swing right as his club goes down the man reach down and grabs tigers nuts yelling "gotcha!" Ofcourse Tiger misses. THey go off and then come back after the game. The man had won. WHen Tiger was asked how he could have lost he replied with, "Do you know how hard it is to play golf knowing there are two more "gotchas" coming. LOL!
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Posted: Sat Jan 01, 2005 4:33 pm
all I have is pics of me looking stupid, that count? LOOK! I'm PICKING my NOSE! here I look like a jackass! and this is about the worse pic I could ever take of myself
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