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 Posted: Sat Jan 19, 2008 7:12 am
Fushigi na Butterfly Except in the eyes of the larger society. Sure, it's perfectly okay between the couple but outsiders don't see it the same as they do.
Sub's friends: We're calling the police.
Sub: Why?
Friends: He took you home and smacked you around a bit for talking to someone without his permission.
Sub: But I deserved it.
Friends: No one deserves that; you're in an abusive relationship and we're calling the police.
In the eyes of the two people in the relationship, everything is okay, but to everyone else it's totally wrong. Do they have the right to get involved for their friend's sake? Whose rules do you abide by? Those of the BDSM community or those of the larger society? Well, I can assure you that most friends of a BDSM couple know about what goes on, EXACYLY so this situation doesn't occur. Very rarely does the behind-the-doors activities carry out into the "real" world. If it does and one of the members is questioned about it, even more rarely is one half of the couple shy about admitting what's going on, usually to avoid a lot of unneccesary hassle. Though I'll reiterate what I've probably posted in this very thread: I don't see how a loving, caring relationship is wrong to God. It's just a different kind of love.
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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 4:59 pm
ryuu_chan Fushigi na Butterfly Except in the eyes of the larger society. Sure, it's perfectly okay between the couple but outsiders don't see it the same as they do.
Sub's friends: We're calling the police.
Sub: Why?
Friends: He took you home and smacked you around a bit for talking to someone without his permission.
Sub: But I deserved it.
Friends: No one deserves that; you're in an abusive relationship and we're calling the police.
In the eyes of the two people in the relationship, everything is okay, but to everyone else it's totally wrong. Do they have the right to get involved for their friend's sake? Whose rules do you abide by? Those of the BDSM community or those of the larger society? Well, I can assure you that most friends of a BDSM couple know about what goes on, EXACYLY so this situation doesn't occur. Very rarely does the behind-the-doors activities carry out into the "real" world. If it does and one of the members is questioned about it, even more rarely is one half of the couple shy about admitting what's going on, usually to avoid a lot of unneccesary hassle. Though I'll reiterate what I've probably posted in this very thread: I don't see how a loving, caring relationship is wrong to God. It's just a different kind of love.
As old-fashioned an attitude as that may be, I still believe in fairness, loving treatment and a degree of equality between man and woman.
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Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 10:34 pm
GuardianAngel44 BDMS (did I get that right?) sounds stupid. So dominant people can do whatever they want to the submissive people? Why would people let them do that to them? Its not stupid. It's a matter of trust and sexual fetish with your partner. My fiancee and I are into it, and it DOES NOT stray us from God, we're not in a cult stare And the other reason im posting this publicly is i would not want any of you thinking, ' just because someone has a sexual fetish, they're damned 'And neither one of us wear leather and collars in the real world, haha! And im not his 'b***h' as some women like to be called, im his lover, his soon to be wife and he doesn't abuse me in any way or vice versa. I love him, he loves me, we've been together a year and a half, and going to get married, we're normal people confused
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Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 8:56 pm
I guess the part where it gets tricky is when a sub's or a dom's need to be told what to do or desire to tell others what to do gets carried into the real world. The sub I spoke to literally hates making decisions for herself. Even for something as small as what she wants to eat. It's not so much a desire for being controlled- it goes beyond that to a necessity to be told what to do because she is actually incapable of doing anything for herself (it's not that extreme, but it could be, if she didn't want to have to explain to her parents what she was into). God wants people to make choices for themselves, not to be put down (even if the other person enjoys it), for a couple to lift one another up in Him. I guess my confusion stems from the two contradicting images these situations present.
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High-functioning Businesswoman
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Posted: Sun Jul 06, 2008 1:14 pm
Fushigi na Butterfly I guess the part where it gets tricky is when a sub's or a dom's need to be told what to do or desire to tell others what to do gets carried into the real world. The sub I spoke to literally hates making decisions for herself. Even for something as small as what she wants to eat. It's not so much a desire for being controlled- it goes beyond that to a necessity to be told what to do because she is actually incapable of doing anything for herself (it's not that extreme, but it could be, if she didn't want to have to explain to her parents what she was into). God wants people to make choices for themselves, not to be put down (even if the other person enjoys it), for a couple to lift one another up in Him. I guess my confusion stems from the two contradicting images these situations present.
I'm curious as to whether Christian couples who practice BDSM feel that God as the third party in the relationship/marriage is blessing that practice.
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Posted: Sun Jul 27, 2008 11:36 pm
I just realised, I have a thing for collars. confused
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Posted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 7:14 am
My immediate answer is to say that it's wrong. But I really can't think of any specific passage in the Bible that goes against it. If that's what floats their boat, I guess it's okay, as long as both partners are fine with it, their married, and no one gets killed in the process. It seems a bit like cutting to me, though, which is a sin.
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Posted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 10:02 pm
Priestley I just realised, I have a thing for collars. confused Then, my good man, do I have a link for you. mrgreen
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