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 Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 12:40 pm
Awww...what happened to Anime Wars?
*At Death Star briefing*
Mon Mothma: Any questions?
Luke: I have one!
Mon Mothma: Yes?
Luke: How come it took us 325 episodes to get to this point?
MM: Well...uh...
Leia: And how come it took us 178 episodes for Han and I to get together?
MM: I don't know...
Luke: And how come I can go into battles and stuff with an annoyingly swooshing background and fight my a** off and still have good hair and look pretty, but I still got my hand cut off?
Sesshoumaru: *Who randomly pops up* I hear ya, man...
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 1:40 pm
GL: I Geroge Lucas herby give my permission to turn Star Wars into a crack experimental anime. Signed George Lucas.
Vader: HHHHHaaaaiiiilll lllooorrrdddd Pallllpaaaatiiiiinnneeee!
Boba: hail.
Palpy: good morning agent Vader, agent Fett.
Vader: Lord palpatine may I ask what is the plan to take over Tatoine today?
Palpy: Ah yes. Vader, may I ask you how to controll a heart of a child?
Vader: Yes to controll the hear of anything you will first have to controll the stomach. That is why I propose to make school lunches better!
Palpy: *pulls cord*
Vader: Aaaaaahhhhh dow the pit I goooooooooooooooo!!!!!
Palpy: Children controlling idea aside, you know of our enemys right agent Fett.
Boba: Yes my lord.
Palpy: Then you know it is dire to us to find out what their next move is. Fett! you and vader shall do a spy mission, as soon as Vader gets out of the pit get on it.
Boba: Yes sir.
Vader: *gets out of pit* egh meheh.
Boba: What was in the pit this time senior?
Vader: oh just hundreds of jawas.
moments later.
Vader: Umm Bo-chan?
Boba: Yes senior?
Vader: why are we working at the catana?
Boba: I do not know.
Vader: Hmm....
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 3:43 pm
Cont.
Vader: You must all hail me, Vader-sama, the greatest ruler of the galaxy!!! KU KU KU KU KU KU KU KU!!!
*Points to Palpatine*
Vader: And this is Palpy-chan, my sidekick!
Palpy: stare Don't call me Palpy-chan.
Vader: Palpy-chan! Our plan is perfect! We shall conquer the rebels and rule the galaxy!!! KU KU KU KU KU KU KU KU KU!!!
Palpy: stressed Don't call me Palpy-chan.
Vader: Yes, down on Endor, they are facing a force most formidable!!! KU KU KU KU KU KU KU KU!!!!
*Down on Endor*
Luke: eek Chibi stormtroopers?
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Posted: Sat Jul 30, 2005 7:28 pm
( Star Wars meets any/every Quest-type RPG/Adventure )
Commander: Luke, we need you to destroy the Death Star!
Luke: I'm on it. * is about to leave for his X-Wing *
Commander: Whoa! Not so fast there, kid. There's steps needed to be taken.
Luke: Like what?
Commander: To take out the Death Star, you must 1st disable its shields on Endor, but to do that, you have to fight through tons of guards.
Luke: Okay...
Commander: But, to even get to Endor, you need to go past the blockade.
Luke: ...
Commander: To do that, you need to visit the nearest 10 planets and search for the 10 shards of the blockade key.
Luke: sweatdrop
Commander: But, to get them, you must 1st get all your inventory items like the boomerang, bombs, arrows, etc.
Luke: stressed * leaves *
Commander: But to get them, you must go into dangerous dungeons and... Luke? Where'd you go? ... ... ... I'm so lonely...
( Next episode )
Luke: WTF!? I spent all that time doing all this crazy s**t, gaining 50 experience levels, maxing out my ammo capacity, only to have to start the next episode without anything again!? SCREW THIS, I'M TAKING UP BALLET! scream
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Darkened Angel Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Jul 31, 2005 2:51 pm
((Due to the arguement in the colosseum))
*a pair of jedi are running down the hallway, with droidekas chasing them. They go into a room*
Jedi 1: Close the blast doors, we'll be safe!
*blast doors close*
Droideka 1: Damn jedi! Exploiting our only weakness! No opposable hands!
Droideka 2: You'd think that all the money and technology that was put into us, with shield generators and repeating blasters, they'd make an extension arm or something to help open a door.
Droideka 1: *reaches out with arm, trying to lift it up to the button console* Almost.... there... just one more inch... *reinforcement door paneling slides into place*
Droideka 2: Damnit! Now we'll never get through! Oh well... I wonder what's at the drivein tonight...
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Posted: Sun Jul 31, 2005 8:48 pm
Vader: What's this tape? Hmm... Let's see what's on it. * puts it into the VCR *
( It plays The Ring thing, and Samara comes out of the TV )
Samara: RRAAAAAAAGGGHHHH!!! * does the scary face at Vader *
Vader: ... sweatdrop * takes off his helmet *
Samara: gonk AAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!! * dies of fright *
Vader: Heh, amatuer.
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Darkened Angel Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2005 12:36 am
*in death star*
Vader: Heh that villan party was soooo awsome, Ill have to invite those guys again sometime. Hey whats this?
(picks something on ground)
Vader: It looks kinda like a ring. Lemmy try it on.
(Vader puts it on)
Vader: Whoa! I feel the energy of a thousand deathstar beams corsing through my body! I can do anything! I can even change the color of my own voice! Muahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
*Menwhile in Mordor*
Sauron: Wayne!
Wayne: what is it this time?
Sauron:.....I forgot.....something.....maybey a DVD?....No thats not it, but it is round....What was it?....God.....Hmmmm.
Wayne: well Ill just go and-
Sauron: Wait! I remember!.......
Wayne: What?
Sauron: .......Do you know where my one ring to rule them all is?
Wayne: I think you left it on the death star during that party with Darth Vader.
Sauron: Yeah that party was awsome, hehe. Everyone was there, even Harry Pott- WAIT! Noooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!
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Posted: Mon Aug 01, 2005 2:43 am
Vader: Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father
Luke: Your MOM happened to my father!
Vader: .......................................................................................................... That's wrong in so many ways.
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Darkened Angel Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Aug 03, 2005 10:54 pm
Luke: Dammit! What is with this weird anime thing going on?
Vader: What do you mean?
Luke: Well, instead of fighting like normal, we have like 3x the dialouge. And, my eyes take up like 1/3 of my head. And then my mouth... It's really tiny when closed, and ridiculously huge when it's open.
Vader: How do you think I feel? Every time I sigh, you see a big-a** sweat drop appear OUTSIDE my helmet. What is up with THAT?
Luke: At least your hair didn't change to purple and defy the laws of physics...
Vader: At least your animation is colored right. See this? On the 3rd frame every time I spin around, my suit changes to a lighter shade for some reason. It's just that one frame, but jeez...
Luke: Yeah well, just don't get suprised by irony and idiocy. That'll cause you to fall over in 1 frame. I almost got whiplash last time that happened...
Vader: What were they thinking when they did this?
Luke: Oh, and this one's the clincher. * pulls out his lightsaber in an overly dramatic motion, with a swooshing background, and it takes him 20 seconds or more *
Vader: Okay...
Luke: I know. They made it so when you pull out your lightsaber, you do that crap like those crappy kid shows where they take forever to transform or whatever it is they're doing. God, who's idea of a sick joke is this?
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Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2005 1:47 am
Anakin: Oh my god! They killed Chewie!
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Darkened Angel Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2005 4:24 am
Nospai Deathous Anakin: Oh my god! They killed Chewie! Mace: You scruffy nerf herders! * Obi-Wan comes running * Obi-Wan: You guys, seriously, what'd I miss? Mace: You miss everything, you fat-a**. Obi-Wan: 'EY! I'M NOT FAT, I'M BIG-BONED!
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Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2005 8:04 am
missing nin itachi *in death star* Vader: Heh that villan party was soooo awsome, Ill have to invite those guys again sometime. Hey whats this? (picks something on ground) Vader: It looks kinda like a ring. Lemmy try it on. (Vader puts it on) Vader: Whoa! I feel the energy of a thousand deathstar beams corsing through my body! I can do anything! I can even change the color of my own voice! Muahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!*Menwhile in Mordor* Sauron: Wayne! Wayne: what is it this time? Sauron:.....I forgot.....something.....maybey a DVD?....No thats not it, but it is round....What was it?....God.....Hmmmm. Wayne: well Ill just go and- Sauron: Wait! I remember!....... Wayne: What? Sauron: .......Do you know where my one ring to rule them all is? Wayne: I think you left it on the death star during that party with Darth Vader. Sauron: Yeah that party was awsome, hehe. Everyone was there, even Harry Pott- WAIT! Noooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!! I saw that...that was a good parody!!!
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Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2005 6:35 pm
Darkened Angel Nospai Deathous Anakin: Oh my god! They killed Chewie! Mace: You scruffy nerf herders! * Obi-Wan comes running * Obi-Wan: You guys, seriously, what'd I miss? Mace: You miss everything, you fat-a**. Obi-Wan: 'EY! I'M NOT FAT, I'M BIG-BONED! Mace: Eh, who cares. we still need to help my dad get his lightsaber to work. Anakin: Whaddyamean? Mace: Well, mom said he's having trouble getting a...a.. an "ee-rekshin." Obi: What da hell is dat? A new Moff? Mace: No, my mom said it means he can't "get his lightsaber to extend." Obi, Anakin: Oohhhhhh...
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Posted: Sat Aug 06, 2005 8:41 am
Announcer: Next on Jerry Springer...
Padme: I'm married to the most feared Sith in the galaxy!
Vader: *ahem* MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!
Announcer: Catch it next on Jerry Springer!
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Posted: Sun Aug 07, 2005 3:37 am
Obi-Wan: Do it, Luke! Kill Yoda! He's old and weak! Kill him now! NOW, DAMMIT! NOW!!
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