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 Posted: Thu Dec 23, 2004 2:54 pm
Pyforhist How to trumpet players traditionally greet each other? "Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm better than you." Ha ha...The trumpet ahead of me is like that. Gawd, my school makes a lot of lame band jokes like.... How many trumpets does it take to unscrew a light bulb? 5. 1 to do it, 4 to do it better. What instument is the best at the limbo? The piccoLOW! What is the scariest band instrument? The BEARatone What instrument goes best with a hotdog? A PICKLElo! Gawd, my school makes the lamest jokes EVER... sweatdrop
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Posted: Thu Dec 23, 2004 3:02 pm
RinoaHeartilly goddess_aphrodite u kno ur a band geek when u constantly get hit with clarinets in the a** xd isn't that right sarah? KRISTEN!!!!! stressed xd We should submit 'You know you're a band geek when you start a collection of your friends' reeds.' If that's not a sign of bandgeekism, I dunno what is. I do that! Wow thats kinda sad...
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Posted: Sat Jan 01, 2005 6:45 pm
EroPsyche RinoaHeartilly goddess_aphrodite u kno ur a band geek when u constantly get hit with clarinets in the a** xd isn't that right sarah? KRISTEN!!!!! stressed xd We should submit 'You know you're a band geek when you start a collection of your friends' reeds.' If that's not a sign of bandgeekism, I dunno what is. I do that! Wow thats kinda sad... Pfft. So do I. xd I'll have to agree. It is quote sad, considering there's no real point in collecting them anyways. It's not like they're actually gonna be worth anything unless our friends become uber famous. xd
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Posted: Sat Jan 01, 2005 7:01 pm
I take offense to this as a saxophonist.
saxophone player:
runs into buildings - I do not do that alot
recognizes locomotives 2 times out of 3 - depends on the make and model.
is not issued any ammunition - I can hit my target with a firearm thank you...even if it doesnt have ammo.
can stay afloat with a life jacket - shut up. sweatdrop
talks to walls, argues with himself - shut up. redface gonk scream
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Posted: Sat Jan 01, 2005 10:20 pm
i HATE this joke, being a tuba player, but whatever.
Q: How many tuba players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Eight; one to screw it in, and the other seven to sit around and complain about how high it is.
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Posted: Mon Jan 03, 2005 1:26 pm
My band had a party, one of the girls said to the boy, "Lick the weiner!" refering to the hotdog that the guy was holding, another person in band walked by and didn't realize what she really meant and mistook it for something else and so did a few other people in the room...
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Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 3:59 pm
One time at band camp...
The girls got to see a Full moon courtesy of the tenor sax player.
They just wouldn't stop shining flashlights into our cabin dangit.! xp
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Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 4:14 pm
Well, our band director told us this story about when he was in marching band.....
For that day they had to come up with their ow field markers, as they weren't providing chips or anything to mark their places. However, poor, silly Brian (BD) slept in, and forgot to take his out that morning. He quickly grabbed some toast from the kitchen and ran to practice. So, practice went on, and the toast (as you might imagine) was quite stepped upon throughout the course of practice. When they were sent back to their spots sometime toward the iddle of practice, he couldn't find his markers. He looked around on the ground a bit, then looked up at the Tuba section in horror-- there stood one of the Tubas, eating his markers!!! I can't imagine the poor Tuba felt very well the rest of the day..... xp
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Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 4:17 pm
Okay, so a member of the marching band walks into Wal*Mart. He walks down the aisle, and there's a sign that says, "Lawn ornaments half off." The band member issurprissed, ad comments, "Huh! I didn't know they sold Pit members!"
Don't worry folks, I'm a professional (by professional I mean, of course, rookie-freshman sweatdrop ) pit member, so I can make anti-pit jokes. ;p
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Posted: Tue Jan 04, 2005 4:20 pm
go check out that forum...You might like this.
thats the name of the forum...
its got this song called the death waltz...read it very carefully.
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Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2005 2:10 pm
My friend...she's a cornet...made up this joke this afternoon...
"Flutes are as straight as any circle."
(pun off of "fruit.")
This could refer to the intrument or the person. xp
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Posted: Fri Jan 07, 2005 9:35 pm
what do u do to a bad drummer ?take away one of his stiks an call him a conucter
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Posted: Wed Jan 12, 2005 11:19 am
Yes, I do play the clarinet, so I feel I can poke fun at myself! lol
A man walks into a meat store looking for some brains for dinner. He looks at the selections:
Flute Brains $1/lb
Tuba Brains $10/lb
Percussion Brains $5/lb
Clarinet Brains $100/lb
He asks the butcher why clarinet brains are so expensive. The butcher replied, "Do you know how many clarinets you have to kill to get a pound of brains?"
How do you get a clarinetist out of a tree?
-Cut the noose!
What do you get when you cross a piccolo and a clarinet?
-An earache.
What's the difference between a clarinet and a mouse?
-You can't hear a mouse squeak over the entire band!
Why do oboists put their oboes in clarinet cases?
-So they won't get stolen!
What do a clarinet and a law suit have in common?
-Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.
If most musicians are either high or low, what does that make an orchestral third clarinetist?
-Confused.
I must admit, I was offended by this next one! lol
What do you get when you remove half a bass clarinetist's brain?
-An even more gifted contrabass clarinetist.
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Posted: Fri Jan 14, 2005 6:23 pm
What's the difference between a saxophone and a lawnmower?
You can tune a lawnmower.
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Posted: Fri Jan 14, 2005 8:56 pm
How many musicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
2! 1 to hold it up, and another to drink until the room spins!
Being a drummer, i'm not too fond of the next two, but anyways...
How do you know the bandstand is level?
There's drool dripping down BOTH sides of the drummer's mouth!
and...
What did the drummer get on his I.Q. test?
More Drool...
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