ginchael
OMG CRITIQUE WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF??/?
rofl Actually, a very good quest with a very good, well developed character. I just have a few random nitpicky things for ya to mull over. 83
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heart ginchael
1. Her first name is Tabitha. Where does Paige come from? Paige does pass as a first name, so you might not even need to include Tabitha. >.>
Well, since i've used the character for other stuff...mmm Tabitha has always been her given name and the name by which her brother calls her. (he frequently uses the nickname Tabby) Everyone else calls her Paige. It's a modified version of her last name LePage. She doesn't enjoy being called Tabitha, because it was given to her by her real mother, and she doesn't care for any reminder that she's not legitimate part of the family. She only tolerates it from Cedric because she tolerates everything Cedric does. I don't NEED to include Tabitha as her original name, consider it a bonus!
ginchael
2. I'm kind of wondering "Why Paige?" Not why they wouldn't want her...XD Buuuut how would Feral find out about her brother? Feral Labs is pretty powerful, but they aren't omniscient. If they have her brother, they're more likely to take him than ship her all the way from France. Maybe on a trip to America to find her brother, she walks into a Feral Labs center and they fake finding him or something...?
I suppose their father, being a big important business man or something (lulz) could have some financial ties to Feral Labs. He could always screw somebody over on a business deal. But Feral labs doesn't have her brother, i'm sure he's in somewhere in America working on a career as a musician. Feral Labs probably wouldn't have tabs on his particular whereabouts, but they may at least be aware of a falling out between Mr. Chattan and two of his children, one of whom is currently going no where in life apart from wondering how she can see her brother again.
You can probably tell i dont have all the minute details worked out, but they're slightly irrelevant since Paige herself would have little knowledge of her father's affairs anyway.
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