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 Posted: Thu Feb 25, 2016 12:12 pm
Lawrence just sighed and his lack of a counter argument was a statement in itself.
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Posted: Thu Feb 25, 2016 12:47 pm
It was strang when Jan held back, and while he didn't often press, the fact that Jan had nothing to say deeply bothered him.
He continued to look at Jan, searching for some signs of an answer the blonde wouldn't give.
"Can't you trust me? Do you think you can't rely on me?"
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Posted: Thu Feb 25, 2016 1:06 pm
It was quite a question and one Lawr wasn't sure he could even answer. He wasn't sure he was even capable of trusting other people, it meant a sort of blind faith which to him was frankly illogical. He could for instance trust Melvin to be distinctly Melvin in all things, stubborn, wellmeaning and a trifle delusional. He could not trust anyone to take as good care of him as he would take care of himself, humans were fundamentally flawed and lazy and were incapable of comprehending divinity or its needs.
He sighed. "I think I can rely on you just fine." he said, shaking his head. "But in things I need or want help with, I don't need help right now, in fact I am completely fine."
He didn't want to give up the hunger or the independence and control even a tiny bit and Lawrence was capable of doing almost anything to obtain the things he wanted.
"But if you really want to watch me eat in some voyeuristic spectacle you are welcome to it." The only way out of the present situation was through a snack he knew and if he made them think he was compliant they would let their guard down again. After all, one snack wouldn't hurt anything, he ate small snacks throughout the day on a regular basis.
"But you should know it is /always/ difficult for me to trust people. I don't think anyone in the entire set of known dimensions is trustworthy."
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Posted: Thu Feb 25, 2016 1:20 pm
"You are not fine and it hurts you would think that. When you can't see when things are getting this serious makes me worry you might be too distracted or overworked that you're not paying enough attention to your most basic needs. As amazing as I think you are, even you should be able to trust and rely on someone."
And he wanted it to be him, but maybe that was asking too much. "I don't care who, but someone there to catch you when you fall. Both literally and figuratively."
He turbed his body to Jan. "I know it's asking a lot and I don't want to force something you think is impossible, but even if I ******** up, can you try trusting me a little bit?@ his hand went to the sheet covering Jan's knee.
"You're my everything. My life wouldn't have meaning without you."
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Posted: Thu Feb 25, 2016 3:44 pm
Rodney stood nearby a bit awkwardly, and finally just set the cup on the table.
"Here," He said, "I think he's okay to walk, after he eats a little. Just with...showers, or battling, you should be careful."
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Posted: Thu Feb 25, 2016 3:47 pm
Lawr looked at the cup for just a split second, then at Rodney and then seemed to deliberately turn his attention back to Melvin.
"Yes. Those are all good points. And I am glad. That I am. What you said." he placed his hand on Melvin's with a propriatory air.
Rodney got a look again. "It is unfortunate your prediction was correct. What's in the cup?"
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Posted: Thu Feb 25, 2016 3:51 pm
"The shake that Mr. Hughes gave us a recipe for. ...You don't have to drink the whole thing. Just so you aren't feeling light-headed."
He was maybe less than impressed with Lawrence's lukewarm response to Melvin's heartfelt confession.
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Posted: Thu Feb 25, 2016 7:50 pm
He felt a tight sting at Jan's rather short, chopped up reaction. Either he was still mad at him or he didn't -
His mind flashed to Horace's lingering sentence. If it mattered.
The fact he invaded his mind left him seething and bitter and he removed his hand from Jan's knee to lean back in the couch. It didn't take long for the anger to fade, but the pain was still there. Jan had at least said he was glad for his feelings, he noted the points, but he didn't even say he would try.
He should be stronger and have more faith in Jan, but shoukd Jan have some faith in him too?
"It's just to get some calories and nutrients into your system. Even half would be good." Half. Not a few sips.
"Better you go sleep and get some rest instead of having your aching stomach try and wake you... And I do want you to wake up in the morning." With Jan here and exhausted, at least he could sleep beside him quietly tonight.
He looked at Jan again. "Will you at least consider what I said tonight? About trying to trust and rely on me a little more? Maybe enough to tell me later what is wrong?" It was a bit awkward to be bringing up this issue in front of Rodney but the poor man kinda went past intimate and awkward since Jan took a shower and fell. He supposed that was what the poor man signed up for when being their roommate.
He looked up at Rodney. "Thank you for helping."
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Posted: Fri Feb 26, 2016 12:21 am
Lawrence sighed heavily. "Yes, I will try to trust you more." Because trying was easy and right now easy statements were all he had energy for.
"Look." He said, noting that the withdrawal of his hand potentially meant Melvin was upset. "I don't want to offend you. I am trying to be direct and clear with you. I care about you. I also care about me is all and I am picky"
The milkshake was an offensive and looming presence and he mentioned this too. "And those shakes sounded abominable." Rodney seemed in a negative mood also and he figured he was going to have to submit to this indignity to get away.
"But ok then." He said irritably. "Give it over." And he extended his hand.
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Posted: Fri Feb 26, 2016 2:21 am
The cup was on the table right in front of Lawrence, but Rodney picked it up and placed it in his hand anyway.
"...I'm going to go change my shirt," Rodney announced.
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Posted: Fri Feb 26, 2016 4:14 am
He looked back and his shoulders heaved with a sigh. "Okay."
He then watched Jan take the shake. "The shake is just for now. You can make your own meal when I don't have to worry you'll fall."
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Posted: Fri Feb 26, 2016 4:53 am
Sighing, he took a sip of the shake. It tasted predictably awful and turned his stomach immediately. Still, he endured.
The root of the thing lately had been that it wasn't just strange shakes which tasted all wrong. It was everything. His sense of smell and taste simply weren't as they had been and it made eating what little he normally did even more of a task than it had been prior.
If he was honest he didn't like the idea of meat, eating some inferior creature to sustain his superior and truly divine form, it was all wrong. He did it sometimes, in small amounts, much as one might accept a meagre offering on an altar and the rest of the time stuck to things which were either cruel - for the sake of the suffering they inherently symbolised - or some small amount of plant matter - because plants were not rancid and diseased in the same way creatures were, they were not sentient.
But his tastes ran more and more towards meat, towards even the most foul and rancid things one could imagine. It made eating even more of a task than it had been and so he avoided it.
His brows remained furrowed as he drank and when he has sipped fully half of the shake, he set it down again. It made him nauseous and he could only hope that he could keep it where he'd put it.
"There." he stated. "Are you both happy?"
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Posted: Fri Feb 26, 2016 5:04 am
Rodney peeked out from the bathroom, looking at the shake Lawrence was now suddenly capable of returning to the table.
"Yes," he said softly, and returned to drying himself off.
Seven was less generous. Why are you even helping this guy? I think Melvin's the only person who would miss him. And he's just going to screw up or, you know, kill more creeple. Net benefit wise, you'd be doing the world a favor if you let him starve himself. It's vanity that's eating at him, not guilt.
"It's not about net benefit," Rodney replied, even quieter. "Everyone matters. And...it's not over or too late for anybody. Not until they're dead."
His daughter didn't matter to him, and now it's too late for her.
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Posted: Fri Feb 26, 2016 5:21 am
Melvin watched as he sent down the shake and smiled. "Yeah. As happy as I can be about the situation. I made the bed of you want to sleep now."
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Posted: Fri Feb 26, 2016 7:08 am
"I am sorry you find this distressing Melvin" he said in the closest attempt at sympathy and friendly placation he could manage. "But I did what you asked right? I'll be fine."
He smiled sweetly. "Now this problem is sorted I think I will go nap for a while."
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