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Without skipping a beat, "I deny it. Avoidance doesn't equate to fear. If you taste something that you dislike, do you need to convince yourself that you dislike it? Do you fear tasting it again? My independence is founded on knowledge and experience, nothing more or less." Rather than fear, she felt it more apt to name the sentiment hatred.

"Mm, the details of my recruitment aren't that interesting," she said dismissively. "Honestly I joined more for financial purposes than anything. I was also told that I would have the opportunity to come closer to my goal, so." And it hadn't been a lie; she had been a mere hairsbreadth away from achieving that goal thanks to Nadja's influence. The lecture - though he dismissed it himself - was met with a half-lidded expression of disinterest. She considered combatting it, saying that she was more than capable of looking after herself, but it seemed an ironic insistence for someone who had nearly been unconscious moments earlier.

A sigh. "If you want perfect honesty, yes, I'm happy with it. I can say this with complete certainty - mostly because I don't know what else there is." She shifted slightly in an effort towards comfort that was, this time, genuine. "I was twelve years old when my mother died. I resigned myself to solitude then, and, frankly, I haven't found any problems with it. I don't know what the alternative is, and I find it difficult to believe you when you say one exists." She remembered Lilith's expression when she had confessed the need to kill her brother, or Panther's anger at her deeds when they returned from the ballroom. Had she not already isolated herself beyond repair?

At his reply, she shifted to an upright position, a somehow ascetic concern comprising her expression. "Don't just say 'is that all'! Don't brush it off like it's nothing! For all you talk about me working myself to death, aren't you the one much closer to that?" Though her complexion was tired, almost sickly, and her posture was distorted in a way that indicated it took all her effort to remain seated upright, nothing in her tone nor gaze wavered similarly. "Did you come here just because you thought it would be a fun way to commit suicide?"

'Vehement,' there was another word that was better substituted as 'determined.' But Aila refrained from the correction; the matter had been conceded, and there was no reason to push it any further.

A sound that could by and large be described as disinterested indicated that she wasn't really making any great efforts towards maintaining the lifestyle; it was simply how she expected to live. Though even if her circumstances changed, she likely wouldn't recognize it - while she generally understood the basic definitions of 'friend' and 'camaraderie,' many years of stubborn independence made it nigh impossible for her to notice such motifs as they occurred in relation to herself.

His flippancy only aggravated her further; not unlike at the bar, having her serious concerns answered with smiles and laughter did little to assuage her irritation. It took little encouragement, however, for her to lie down, though her tired features remained wary. "You say you can take care of yourself, but you managed to secure not only a demotion, but a place in the brig. Being threatened with execution isn't a common occurrence, even with this organization as it is. As the person who recruited you - as the person who volunteered to supervise you - I think I reserve the right to worry as much as I see fit." It wasn't too much longer before the mandatory retraining period ended, but would Seth even approve the promotion at that time? With a sigh of resignation, she permitted herself the comfort of closing her eyes, though a distinctly perturbed expression lingered.