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When you start playing in groups at the college level, you may have a professor who gives you a metaphor for what you should do with your playing...and not make a lick of sense. Thus...Knudsvig-isms, named after my Jazz 2 conductor.

1) "You guys are playing this swing number too fast. Burlesque dancers can't dance to music that goes fast."

2) "No no no, you can't be a sleeping monster who was poked with a sharp stick."

3) "You know how a boat bobs in the ocean? Do that, but instead of water, think of yourselves bobbing in a sand sea."

... question

This is something everyone in the band has said at one point or another.

"Respect the COC!" (pronounced kock)

The COC is out code of conduct and when somebody publicly displays affection says a bad word we yell this. We have gotten so many wierd looks.

Oh.My.God.
I can't even recall all the crazy stuff that happens in my band. My concert band is a bunch of missfits. There is this one asian kid and he is sooo funny. He say's all kind of things. He has made our band teacher crack up before.
Him and a few other's make up alot of stories. We are playing as song about Moscow, and he started talking like he was an old man who was in Viatnam. He alway's starts: "Oh, I remember back in Nam...." and he comes up with such weird things. And one time, we where in the middle of a song, and he messed up and yelled "CRAP!" In the middle of the song.
I remember one time. (Funny kid= Ben, his friend= guy2, band director= Swanny)
(They where pretending to be russian soilders, speaking in russian accents)

Ben: Oh, I was in Nam. Back in Nam, it was crazy.
Guy2: Yes, yes, I remember.
Ben: It was so crazy, we fought for Russia with our lives.
Guy2: Yes, I lost this arm. *Points to his left arm*
Swanny: But, Ben, your Asian.
Ben: Awwwe...*bow's head in shame and defeat. Then look's up and point's at Swanny* But Russian's in asia!
Me: Half of it *rolles eyes*
Swanny: *lower's and shakes head, and pretends to stab him self with baton*

Today, we broke off into sectionals, and the trumpet's went into the music storage room, and they where basically having a war. One guy turned off the lights and launched a counter attack. All the music stands where knocked over. One kid climbed onto the top of a shelf, with his trumpet, and when the lights went off, he slipped and fell off. Then he came running out and when he turned, his trumpet mouth piecce flew off and hit the lockers. He grabbed and ran down the hall.
My band if Funny. But it's kind of the whole, you had to be ther thing.

So at lunch I always sit with this trumpet player(Who sucks....) Well today we were discussing the football team's recent horrible loss(38-0) and I brought up something that happened at rehearsal.

So there was a part in the drill we were setting where this trumpet player ends up behind me. Well, he marked his spot off on the yardlines, which were squiggly(as usual). So our director calls him out on it and tells him to get in line with me. Not that its early morning and the shadows are directly in front of us, so you can see if the people behind you are in line. Well, I'm watching his shadow because I can just see it from my position, and I can see he is now in line. Behind me, I hear him mumble "now I'm not in line..." So at lunch, I called him out on saying that, telling him that even though he wasn't on the yardline, he really was in line(plus, bd said so.)

Me: The yardlines can be wrong. Get in lien with people, not with the yardlines. The yardliens are not god, the director is.
Him: The God of the yardlines will hate you for that...
Me: But the band gods will love me.
Him: Either way, your gonna die.

(By the way, I still won the arguement.)

The other day, we were working on prt 3 of our show, Beethoven's Scherzo(we are doing a Beethoven theme)

Well, at the end, there is a measure of rest for the whole band, and then we do really loud and fast eight notes to end it. Well, We got there, and right on beat 4, a pit member sneezed really loudly, and we had to come in right afterwards. Led by a sneeze. It was hilarious timing, and totally would have worked for the song if we could do it on comand(actually the sneeze was more in time then the pit ever is)

Last night, I got a small group of people (my best friend in the clarinet section, a sousaphone player that I'm sure she likes, a guy who was supposed to do marching band if there wasn't a class schedule conflict, and myself) to go play bingo at a college event. I payed for the admission fee. We left after the first game because the admission turned out to be a certain amount per game (as in, we had to pay for each card). I payed $17 dollars for my group (3 for $12 plus the one person for $5). We hung out outside of the room for a bit and went into my best friend's room about an hour later. My best friend and I would text each other if there were things we didn't want to say. The guy who couldn't do marching band left a bit after 11 PM while the sousaphone player and I left at 2:30 AM. So basically this is what happened some time after the one guy left.

Me: *texts "Hey, I have an idea!" at 1:52 AM*
My best friend (who shall now be referred to as V): *texts "What's the idea?" at 1:53 AM*
Me: *texts "Get him to flex biggrin " at 1:53 AM* (Okay, explanation time. I have a theory that sousaphone players are quite strong, seeing how much a sousaphone weighs and all the stuff they have to do with it.)
V: *texts "When? u mean to show his muscles?" at 1:54 AM*
Me: *facepalms and texts "That's what I meant, [insert her first name here]! at 1:54 AM. I then say* You have a lot to learn.
A (the sousaphone player): You have a lot to learn!
Me: See? Even he said you have a lot to learn!
A: And I have no idea what you guys are talking about.
Me: *texts " sad You don't like my idea." at 2:02 AM*

Sorry, I didn't feel comfortable putting in people's real names because my best friend has an interesting name and I don't know if anyone in my marching band uses Gaia Online or is a member of this guild. I was looking over my texts for that conversation and I just realized that I never answered the "when?" part when I was texting. Shame on me sad . I'm in color guard, BTW. We also agreed that we need to hang out more often. My best friend and I both think the guy is kind of cute redface