.what to do, what to do.
Journal - it's been awhile with little change in my life. The baby is still as fickle as ever, the blue fa'e is as obsessed with music as always, and the little fluffball is . . . . still fluffing and obsessing over watches.
It's late, it's quiet, and I find it's the only time I have to write. The days seem to drift in to one and another and I find that there is no such thing as 'selfishness' when raising children. Cheylir's a wonderful boy and very rarely gets in trouble or throws a fit, but Faolan is something else entirely. I'm learning how to better handle his mood swings and temper tantrums, but it's not easy. Part of me is starting to understand that most of the time he cries for attention or throws a fit just to see how I respond.
It's strange but he almost seems to enjoy watching me flip a lid. Sometimes he laughs and thinks it's a game, other times he knows he did bad and will quickly settle and do his best to appease me.
Babies! ARGH!
And when will diaper duty be done? o_O;
Thankfully I have only one more after Faolan grows. . . . Maybe, if I'm lucky, the little black and yellow dustbunny will be potty trained?
Wishful thinking, I know. Parenting, even after all these months, still terrifies me. Am I raising them right? Am I giving them enough love and attention? I'm not spoiling them too much, am I? Is my discipline molding them in to a find sort of breed?
Argh. I just don't know.
Heaven knows what they'll be like as they age. . . .
The clock says 1:03 am and sleep still eludes.
Maybe I need to stop thinking tonight. Maybe I need to stop worrying.
I haven't killed the children yet, have I? That's a good sign. . .
