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 Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 1:31 pm
Wilson was shot back down by that same glanced he hated to like. Who was saying he thought House was uncaring? Sure, sometimes it was hard to tell, but House always found some way to show him he cared. But he never thought House didn't care, a reason he liked being around him in the first place. As House tried to get up, he tried to stop him.
"House I know you're not uncaring. That’s why I hang out with you every day and take your jokes in stride, even if others are repulsed. I was happy, now I'm wondering what seemed to make you wonder." he asked.
He knew where this was heading. If he allowed House to walk out, he would follow behind him as they fought. And everyone around them would think they were fighting like a married couple, just like Houses "friends" from the poker game. The fighting in the streets seemed the type of thing men and their wives do and it appeared that they were going to dance the same dance over again.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 1:41 pm
"It doesn't matter," He said as he turned slightly to look at Wilson. He was keeping his voice at a nice even tone, although his first words seemed like a hiss. "I've found that out over the course of time. Really don't worry about it, don't worry about me." He looks towards the exit, and sighs. "Look I'll be waiting outside, I had a big breakfast." He was lying of course, he hadn't eaten anything at all.
"You don't have to follow me, I really would rather not fight about it." He said with a slight shrug, "Just treat me like the red-headed step-child and forget about me." He began to walk to the door, pointing the waiter in Wilson's direction.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 3:41 pm
Wilson sighed as he sat back on the table. House had to be kidding, only an idiot would sit alone in a cafe. He decided to just take the food back to the hospital, the day out had crashed and burned anyway. This was great, worrying about House only made House pissed off, yet he would be if Wilson gave less then a damn about him. He sunk against the booth, debating whether his appetite had disappeared or not. The knot in his stomach was making it hard to have any room for food. When the waiter came back to his table, he stared up at him.
"I'll just take the chicken special to go." he stated simply.
Once the waiter left, he stood from the table. People were glancing at him, but he just gave them one look and they turned back to their own business. He headed for the door and saw House standing there. He sighed softly to himself, he didn't want to fight either. Plus he knew House was hungry or he would have not wanted to go eat lunch, but telling House that was pointless. He was not sure of what to say to House, but he had to think of something. For now, he sat on one of the outside chairs, wanting to give House space. Hopefully House would calm down, at least before Wilsons food came. For some reason, he still felt that there was a deeper reason to why House got so concerned and questioning of their friendship. He was only concerned about him, it hurt that just caring about House seemed to piss him off.
What's to say he would hate it more if Wilson even dared to think he was falling deeper for House. If he was, could a relationship even work, that is if he were gay.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 3:57 pm
House stood outside calming himself, it was close to an anniversary of sorts. It was close to the day when Stacy had left him. It still had its affects on House, he loved Stacy but he still couldn't forgive her. She ruined any future relationship for him. He couldn't trust anyone with his heart or his body, well not anyone so far. He knew he should explain to Wilson how he was feeling but he just couldn't.
He took his pills from his pocket, he looked at them and leaned against his bike. He knew that they weren't the answer to his problem but they were pretty damn close. He sighed and put them back in his pocket, he knew Wilson would see. Why did he care so much about what Wilson thought of him? Sure Wilson was his friend but that didn't mean he had to change himself to make Wilson happy, or was that exactly what it meant.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 4:09 pm
Wilson watched him from time to time, but he made sure not to stare completely. These thoughts were beginning to piss him off, thinking of House either made him extremely happy or sad. His friend was having more of an affect on him then normal friends had on one another. But he couldn't be gay, after all these wives how could he be interested in men. Even if he cheated constantly, mainly not feeling connected to any of them, or he would blow them off to hang with House. The voice telling him he was homosexual was becoming louder and harder to ignore, maybe it was true.
That would be horrible, House stared at Cuddys boobs so much how could he even be remotely attracted to a guy. No, if House knew t could ruin what they already had. House was already on a breaking point as it was, finding out his best friend was gay the entire time and was actually attracted to him. The whole situation would make their relationship awkward, he didn't need that. Besides that, House was getting mad at him for being concerned, which would only intensify in a relationship. No...he had to work this out on his own.
He looked up to see the waiter standing beside him as he placed the food container on the table.
"Thank you and sorry." Wilson murmured before taking the food in hand.
"It's alright, hope things look up for you two." he stated kindly before heading inside.
What exactly did he mean by that?...He must have been paranoid at this point, thinking everyone knew. Standing up, he headed over to House. Though his heart beated faster as he got closer, he was nervous to only make things worse somehow.
"So should we head back?" he asked.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 4:25 pm
House had been brooding for a while letting his mind wonder. He had been thinking of how Wilson contributed a lot to their friendship and House barely budged for him. It angered him that he could only regard Wilson as another person that would hurt him. He kept him at arms length at all times, and anytime he would let him close he always got angry at him. Why was he like this? He couldn't blame Stacy for all his problems, he was just born slightly screwed up. When Wilson spoke he looked up at him and couldn't help bursting out. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to freak out on you."
It took a lot to admit that he was sorry. House didn't normally appologize, but Wilson was worth it. "Your one of the best friends that I've ever had, Jimmy, probably the only best friend." He looked at Wilson with a small frown but he tried to force a slight smile, "But enough of my pity party, lets go, and if you tell anyone that I said any of that I will cut up every tie you own."
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 4:41 pm
Wilson looked taken back when House came out with an apology right off the bat. He wondered what was wrong, since it seemed House was on some kind of man period that medical science had not discovered. Joking about that however would possibly be writing out his death wish. Plus, he really didn't want to upset House further. All he wanted to do was find out what could possibly be bothering him. He smiled, about to say something before House continued. Best friend..that statement made him think again about what had been on his mind. He could not tell House, at least not that he liked him. Now that he was calling him a best friend, it might taint it to suggest it was anything more.
So to cover himself, he chuckled at the last statement, even if Houses freak out still bothered him to a degree. It was a mix of concern and pissed that the day alone was basically dead. Hopefully the ride back would help, but he doubted it, all this did not help enough to rid him of some stress about the patients he was about to break bad news to. He sat on the bike and put the helmet on his head, the food placed in front of him and between the two of them.
"It's fine, just hope you feel better. But you owe me big." he stated with a smile, though half of it wasn't a joke.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 4:52 pm
House paused before starting his bike, "Wilson, You know I've been consumed in my own s**t that I haven't asked you what your problem is." He turned his head slightly to look back at Wilson. "I mean you've seemed to have something on your mind, you know other then my tight a**." He grinned slightly, dropping the serious talk from before to begin to joke with Wilson.
"Its not your patients, I know that much, I mean you care and all but not that much. I mean your compassion far out matches mine but usually you don't space out like this." He looked back at Wilson with a raised eyebrow, but he turned back because it was uncomfortable to keep that position.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 6:22 pm
Wilsons smile went away quickly, he was in for it now. How else could he avoid telling House what was really on his mind. Other then using Houses silence as an excuse for him not to be open either. But the problem was, he had been open about them being close friends. So even if he was not sharing his problems, he was still sharing. His eyes looked away, unsure of what to do. Apart of him wanted to believe that it was just a phase, but he longer he thought about it the more he believed it was concrete. His hands refrained from wrapping around House at the moment, they were not moving so if he was going to spill, it would at least leave House a bit clueless.
"Well my patients don't help...but I don't even know if it is something I should be worrying about.." he replied.
The feeling were honest, but he was scared to tell House the truth. Not so much that he might like men, but that House may find some way to piece it to him liking House. But by all this today, he was unsure if House could even be in a relationship with him. So it made him feel a little better to think that it might just stay a friendship, but he was still scared. This must be what it felt like when a person was planning on coming out. He wondered if him telling House or if House discovered that Wilsons new fling might not actually be a female.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 6:36 pm
"Wilson, I just shared what little soul I had with you and this is all I get. How can you expect this relationship to work if we don't share our feelings?" House said with a thick sarcasm accompanying it. He actually got off the bike, with some difficulty to look at him. His blue eyes stared at him but they had a certain twinkle. "Give me something Jimmy, You can lie to me, just make it interesting."
House leaned on the bike still, because his leg had been bothering him all day. But he wanted to be able to look at Wilson when he answered him. House was honestly intrigued by Jimmy's silence and distracted attitude. At least Wilson usually tried to pretend to pay attention to things around him.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 6:44 pm
It was hard to keep eye contact while House told him to give him a little bit as well. Since when did House become an expert in relationships and how to save them? That was some bitterness talking, the point was he was showing he cared now and Wilson should do the same. The gay side of him being upset about a perfect time being ruined didn't help any, reminding him that it was House that got him to notice that something was off about himself. Everything he had done in the past made sense now, his actions, his love life, everything. He took a deep breath before sighing heavily. There was no way out without causing yet another argument, all he could do now was pretend that this had nothing to do with House.
"...I think I might be gay." he said, not meeting Houses eyes but facing forward.
After a few seconds of avoiding eye contact, he looked up into Houses eyes staring at him, curious and fearful fro his reaction.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 6:58 pm
House looked at Wilson for a while as if expecting something else. "Thats it? You might be gay?" Surprisingly House didn't laugh, "Wilson, you could have told me that." House shook his head with a little smirk forming on his face. He eased himself back on the bike, but he still waited to start it. "I mean it kind of makes sense, you know, how you get defensive when I joke about your preferences." He laughs slightly.
"But I hope you know that I'll be checking out all your boyfriends, to make sure their good enough for you." He was grining ear to ear and you could hear it in his voice. He started up the bike and yelled over the engine, "Hold on tight!"
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 7:05 pm
((I'll be back and forth from doing homework after this post. Got a lot still to read for tomorrow))
He looked shocked as House brushed it off, sure House was open-minded, but it normally shocked people to hear that others were gay. It bothered him that he was the only one stressing about this, though part of it was because of who it was he was gay for. He remained in shock until House told him to hold on, obeying, he wrapped his arms around Houses waist again. Though his body was sitting more upright then it had been on the way to the cafe.
"It's not like you didn't do that with my girlfriends." he stated, his voice raised so House could hear him through the engine.
"I was afraid to admit to it myself, so I was terrified to actually tell people something I was not wanting to be true." he replied.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 7:18 pm
House laughed lightly, but remained silent, he wanted to enjoy the ride. The scenary began to whiz past them, the colors began to fade together, and the wind felt so good against him. Riding his bike was his escape, his personal freedom, and Wilson might not know how personal it was for him to share this with him. He wanted to tell Wilson that hehandled it well because he wanted Wilson to be with him. But he couldn't, he would be worse for Wilson then all of his ex-wives put together. There was so much that House wanted to share with Wilson, but he was afriad of getting hurt.
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Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2008 9:01 pm
Wilson was not sure how to take Houses silence, maybe he felt more awkward then he lead Wilson to believe. Even so, the ride was relaxing and he staring around. The motorcycle no longer made him uncomfortable, it was actually better then driving a car. Even if the cafe plans were shattered, the ride did make him feel better, if only slightly. How was lift going to be like now that he was going to stop dating women. He might need to be more careful around House, but he would worry about that later. Slowly, he laid his head on Houses back, it had become more comfortable then sitting upright.
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