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 Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 4:24 pm
Donner had since made his way over to a well-kept food and water dish to engourge himself, his tongue lapping up the water. Other than that the room seemed completely silent and dead for a few moments... until the sound of claws on tiles eminated from the bathroom.
Amaya rotated so she was curled inward, back facing out as she huddled behind the toilet with her hands over her head. Her five foot long tail could barely be contained in the small restroom, so it slid towards the doorway in plain view before trying to curl fruitlessly inside again.
She hated her tail. It did nothing but get in the way and pick her out as more and more of an animal. Not that anything beat laying eggs. That meant she was an animal on the inside too. Nothing but her mind was left and even it was tainted with instincts she knew she didn't have before, no matter how natural they felt. She wished her brain was an iguana's too... that way she could just go about her life without caring about anything. That way she could be numb.
The bathroom was cooler than the rest of her humid room and she could feel her body temperature slipping on every part of her body that touched the cold tiles or the porcelain bowl of the toilet. She sniffed and let out a little sob, but was too tired to start in hysterics again.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 3:29 pm
As he received no answer again, Alec's eyes focused on the dog as the only source of life in the duplex at the time. It wandered about with the ease of familiarity to its surroundings and when it went to its food dish, he was smart enough to leave it be. A small sigh escaped his curved mouth when his mind began convincing him that this was all just a waste of time but the sudden, faint sound of movement deflected over the hard surfaces of the bathroom, he knew better. Gripping the wheels to his chair, he slowly edged towards the room with a strained courage, thankfully taking note of the tail in his path before he stopped to ensure he didn't roll over it.
A single glance inside and he could easily point out the dark green mass behind the toilet, a poor hiding spot for such an awkward-bodied individual. The sight reminded him of a child hiding from the wrath of a parent and it made him sad that she'd react to him in such a way. Maybe he really should leave.
"Ye left th'door op'n." The boy tentatively spoke in a deliberately quiet tone. He couldn't stand the sound of his own voice booming in such an enclosed room.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 3:38 pm
Amaya sniffed a few more times even after the shark boy spoke up, staying in her huddled and curled position so her scaley, spiked back was facing him. The silence in the room was suffocating, even for her. It took her a lot of swallowing to finally speak up, her voice barely above a whisper. "I bet you're disgusted in me now." She finally choked out.
Who wouldn't be? He had been there. He had seen it all. She wasn't human anymore. Just a big lizard with the voice of some girl who had died over a year ago.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 4:05 pm
Alec hadn't expected the answer he'd received though when he shoved his pile of insecurities aside, he scolded himself for not considering it. After all, it was just like her to think herself imperfect in the end.
"A' wou'nt say tha'." The boy slowly began, feeling a bit better now that she'd finally answered him and somewhat discovered the reason for her actions. "A' don' lie... ye scared t'shite ou'a me is all." He was picking at the t-shirt he'd taken with him that morning for dignity's sake to lay over his lap. It was encrusted with sand and grass stains, evidence of the violent encounter not long ago. Thiking back on it, he felt very stupid for what he'd done. "A' d'neh why ye'd think a'd think tha'," His voice dropped to a mumbling monotone as he unconsciously added in some personal thoughts he wasn't sure he really wanted her to hear. "A mean lookit me, a'd prob'leh shite ou' God-knows-wha' 'f a' was a girl." He wan't sure if this was helping any but it wasn't like he was thinking things out well enough before speaking anyways.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 4:10 pm
"Least you don't have to worry about it." The girl sniffled, wallowing in her own self-pity. "Next year I bet the same thing will happen at the same time. After I change colours." She sniffed and burried her head in her knees.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 4:34 pm
Alec twitched, brow furrowing into a deep knot in the middle of his grey head. It was going to happen again? What the hell was that supposed to mean? He was at a loss for words at first, almost trying to physically spit them out like they were tangible and stuck somewhere in his throat. It didn't help that he'd slowly begun to feel more on edge, a tiny bit defensive. He could understand that she'd moved on but he didn't need a slap in the face so painful as that. "Can' ye joost... stop yeself?" He stared at her now with one narrowed eye, an expression of confusion to mask his irritation.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 4:46 pm
Stop herself? Now how the hell was she supposed to do that? Oblivious to such a huge misunderstanding, Amaya's eyes narrowed and she turned her head to look at him with one brown and yellow eye. "If I knew I'd get pregnant for no reason I woulda stopped it LAST time." Then she turned her head back again, shoving it into her knees.
"And even if I HAD sex what the hell would happen then? Would they still be born dead? What the ******** would my children look like?" She argued mostly to herself.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 5:07 pm
This was starting to get obsurd, the excuses she was throwing were not consoling in the least. The boy shifted irritatedly in his chair, voice raising as he began to get rather uppity. "Well if ye fool aroun' 'Maya, ye ge' preg-wuh?" He stopped mid-sentence, harsh tone cutting off to leave a void filled with brain-breaking confusion.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 5:19 pm
Amaya froze, eyes shooting open. Fool around? FOOL AROUND?! Her head snapped to stare at him, a look of pure disgust on her face. "FOOL AROUND?!" Her body then turned to face his and she kneeled, hands raising in a flailing gesture like she had no clue how to react to such an accusation.
"I didn't fool around with anyone! What the hell are you trying to say! Look at me! Who would even touch me?!" Her words started to come out of her mouth before she even thought of them, an emotional torrent of sewage. "I'm still a virgin! No one's laid a hand on me and I haven't laid a hand on anyone! You were the first and only person I ever even LOVED! And even though you don't like me that doesn't mean I'd go SLEEP WITH SOMEONE! How could you think that?!" By now she realised she was doing a lot of yelling and breathed, her chest heaving.
"The labs... they told me lizards lay eggs even if they don't mate." Her steam dissipated as quick as it had come and once again she slumped back, her tail flicking beside her as she leaned against the back of the toilet. "They were all dead before they were born. They weren't even anything but shells." She sniffed, the horrible feeling like she had lost a child welling up inside her chest again.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 5:59 pm
If Alec was unprepared for anything, it was definetly the outburst that followed the brilliant arguement he'd just spewed outwards. His understanding all along had been supported by what he felt was hard evidence; Amaya had taken the supposed rejection to heart and had moved on with her life, only to find out that her relationship with another had resulted in a twisted version of impregnation. Apparently, some details had been lost in translation.
The young teen watched wide-eyed at the flailing iguana girl, sinking back into his seat now silenced and wishing he'd never said a thing at all. That all changed as she began exclaiming further on what was going on, finally showing some of her true colours. You were the first and only person I ever even LOVED!... Her words hit harder than what she would've guessed at the time, an expression of shock slowly melting from his features into a sense of calm defeat. 'Was'. A small word that could've been easily passed over by someone who didn't care to hear it. What was there was now gone forever. Why did he feel like dying now? Why did she have to say it like that? Like he was the ultimate let-down, the heartless killer to the love-struck fool.
She was wrong about so many things and she was too enthrawled with the pain. Or maybe he was? It was second-nature now.
Whether it was relief that the cards were now laid out fully or the crushing blow that was both invisible and silent and much too small to note, the boy inhaled sharply and felt his bottom lip quiver, though he held in the rest. He barely had the strength to speak up. "Theh weren' dead." He hoarsely and quietly added after giving a moment of silence to ensure the tears stayed put on both sides. "Theh... nothin' alive n' th'first place."
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 6:10 pm
Amaya looked back up at him with sad yellow eyes. His words hurt her more than he knew and she slumped, looking back down at her lap. She sniffed and one of her hands rose up to rest over her stomach. "It's different when you have something inside you."
She curled up into a ball again, burrying her head into her knees and curling her tail around her long clawed toes. "It shouldn't have happened. It's wrong." The girl squeaked out, her voice high-pitched as she tried to keep herself from crying tearlessly again.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 6:28 pm
Alec let out a deep sigh, letting his shoulders sag heavily on his bent frame. He ran his hands over his face, feeling exhausted all of a sudden. The strain was too much to take, the realization that it had been all one huge mistake. He'd have to have to find Zach now, if the man wasn't plotting his death at that very moment. "Wha' d'ye want me t'say." He mumbled again in a hoarse, tired tone. "None o' this s'supposed t'appen."
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 6:33 pm
Amaya stayed silent for a long time, then looked up and over at the bottle of pills that had been left on the edge of the sink. She had lost the will to take her own life now that Alec was here, but who knew what she'd feel sooner or later. Afterall, he would never love her.
"Is it because of how I look?" She finally asked, though didn't make what she was refering to very clear. She didn't look at him, eyes focused on the pills sitting on the edge of he sink, her toothbrush and other such things having been knocked out of the medicane cabinet as it hung open, the only thing in the room in disaray.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 7:21 pm
All it seemed to the contrary, Alec knew exactly what she was referring to. He'd been avoiding it for so long but he couldn't deny that it was always on his mind, even now, and he'd have to deal with it sooner or later. Besides, there was no feesable way out of a question like that now. "Neeeh s'no' 'ow ye look, 'Maya." The boy began with a laid-back tone, insistant on keeping his cool this time. He'd dance around the subject as much as possible, for sure. "S'no' abou' ye at ALL, don' ye realize!? Well i' is sorteh, bu'... no' realleh... no' like ye think, or... somethin?" He was probably confusing the issue more than what was needed but it depended on whether Amaya was able to interpret any of it as sincere.
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Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 7:27 pm
Yellow eyes looked back up at him as she sat curled up behind the toilet - though at least she was facing him now. "So it's about you?" She asked for clarification. Yes, this is what she wanted, no NEEDED to know. After finding out exactly why he didn't like her she could have closure and move on, whether that be with someone else (haha, not likely) or whenever she got up the nerve to take her own life.
"Do you just... not like me for some reason?" She asked with an almost indifferent shrug. She was running out of reasons to keep her heart held out for him. Her arms were getting tired and he wasn't going to take it. "Please just tell me." Her head slumped. "So I can stop thinking about it."
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