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| Is the profile worth your time reading? (please explain if you don't answer yes ^.^) |
| Yes, its excellent. |
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50% |
[ 8 ] |
| It need to be fleshed out more (how?) |
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0% |
[ 0 ] |
| Some things need to be changed (in what way?) |
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12% |
[ 2 ] |
| Something'salready been used by someone else (please tell me what) |
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0% |
[ 0 ] |
| Your almost there, but there's something about it that i can't pin down |
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12% |
[ 2 ] |
| It sucks do it over (any particular reason why?) |
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25% |
[ 4 ] |
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| Total Votes : 16 |
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 Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2007 9:50 pm
Two colored drawings one, 0% other....either 75% or 100% i'm still tweaking the character design.
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Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 8:37 pm
Two more drawings, finding uses for her wingies, more to come.
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Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 10:36 pm
Okay, you wanted a critique, right? Well, here you go.
Overall, I think your character is pretty well laid out and is pretty sturdy, but it isn't perfect, of course. There's nothing really here that could be possibly 'life-threatening' to your thread, but there are things that could definitely be worked out a little smoother. You might want to add a section for her relationships, such as family, friends, etc. You do have one, but you may want to expand it and even give her relationship with that person. (Ex: estranged, or close, hardly ever see, etc.)
I also suggest that you expand Chay’s history a bit. It’s pretty comprehensive and covers the most important parts of her life I suppose, but it would be nice to have some more details in certain places, like her childhood
You also have some grammatical errors, mostly run-on sentences, which can make it kind of hard to read some times. There are also some places were you forget your punctuation. wink
But anyways, I think that’s about it for now. So I hoped this helped a bit!
~A.P
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Posted: Sun Mar 11, 2007 4:07 pm
-Added to family relations
-Added more of her childhood to history
-Change in funds
-Edited reasons why she would end up on the island
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Posted: Sun Mar 11, 2007 10:49 pm
Edited the answer to the question. Why a giant river otter? To make a heck of a lot better sense and a more logical reason why it would be chosen.
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Posted: Thu Mar 15, 2007 10:42 pm
Edited funds. Just reached the basic 20.
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