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 Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 5:45 pm
"Isn't that... kind of low to do? To write a guy a note and then disappear on him? I mean... he's in a pretty bad state right now. Izumi hurt him pretty bad. Don't you think I owe him at least a face to face approach?" she asked softly.
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 5:51 pm
"Obie, If I thought for one moment you could do it face to face and walk away then I would say yes. You said yourself you can7t think straight around him normally, when he has a reason to gain your sympathy it will be harder."
She took a breath and looked at her seriously.
"It is low, but you have to think of yourself here. You can always call him when you get where you are going, but only when you get there. I know this sounds crazy and harsh, but I honestly think it's the only way you are going to get out of this. Sometimes you have to hurt people to save yourself."
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 6:00 pm
Obie nodded silently. She could picture the look on Nato's face. It would crush him. He had come so far to... No. No he hadn't, she suddenly realized. He was his old self. He had slept with a thirteen year old boy and while he was with her. What if he had lied about Crystal too? It wasn't like he had been restraining himself from her in the garden that night, and she had been standing right there with him. Holding his hand even. Oh god... how could she have been so stupidly blind? Her thoughts began to make her blush. Why couldn't she have seen this earlier? Why couldn't she have stuck to her guns and stayed angry with him like she had intended? Suddenly, the dojo was feeling incredibly stuffy.
"I... think I should go," she said preparing to stand up.
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 6:11 pm
"No Obie, wait." Jess said standing with her. "Please, wait a moment." Brushing her hair out of her eyes she took a step towards Obie.
"Let's go and get some coffee." She said grabbing the dojo keys and following Obie out to lock the door. "Tell me how you're feeling. I think a lot of this comes from bottling things up."
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 6:18 pm
Obie slipped her shoes on as Jess locked the dojo. Thinking about Jess' offer as she laced her shoes, she finished and stood, folding her arms in front of her as they started walking.
"Feeling? I'm feeling hurt, scared, confused, angry, embarassed, stupid. The dumbest part of all is that I knew that this would happen. I lied to myself and said that he could change. I thought that he had. He seemed so different. And that scares me because I thought that I could change. But I'm only fooling myself," she replied, watching the ground as they walked.
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 6:38 pm
Jess looked at Obie and smiled a little as they headed towards the gates of Aquila.
"Everyone can change, they just need to be willing." She said as she shoved the keys in her pocket. "This is why you need to get away though, because it is clear that you cannot change when you are with him. What you are feeling, what you have done is only natural. We all have that defence mechanism that says it's going to be all right."
Jess frowned as she kept walking, she would continue when they got to the coffee shop.
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 6:56 pm
They walked in silence the rest of the way to the coffee shop, Obie's mind whirling with uncertainty. She hated feeling this way. She preferred feeling in control. They ordered their drinks and went to sit down at a table near the window. Obie stirred in some sugar and looked up at Jess.
"I hate this. I hate feeling this way. I've felt like this for so long. I just want to be happy," she said, taking a sip.
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 7:06 pm
"I know love." She said softly. "I'm a control freak, if I can't control my thoughts and feelings it knocks me for six. I make stupid mistakes." She laughed a little out of nerves and pulled out a menu. "You know, before I came here I was heading to a dark place." She said looking out the window, "Maybe I'm still headed there, but I've met people who have changed that."
She looked back at Obie and smiled.
"One person told me the truth about where my life was going if I didn't change. I ran from him, it's why I came here. I didn't want to believe what he said was true. Now I know though, and here I've found people who showed me something different, that my life before wasn't what I thought it was, that there is more to life."
She swallowed and looked down at the table.
"You will be happy Obie, I promise you. But only when you listen to those deep instincts that tell you when something is wrong."
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 7:19 pm
Obie toyed with her mug as she listened to Jess, glancing up at her every once in a while, but mostly keeping her eyes on the mug before her. When Jess was finished, she took a deep breath and sat back in her seat. She stared out the window as she slowly let the breath out, then looked to Jess.
"It's kind of nice to know that I'm not the only one that feels like this," she smiled lightly, running her finger along the curve of the ceramic handle.
"Are you still going to drop me from the club?" she asked randomly. She has been sincere when she had said she didn't want to. But she still wasn't sure if it was fair for her to still be signed up.
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 7:27 pm
Jess smiled and shook her head.
"I don't drop students. You can start fresh after summer break. Sorry if I was snappy earlier." She said cupping her mug in both hands. "Things just never let up. Family, relationships and work. A leathal combination." Taking her first sip of the hot drink she looked out the window again.
"But I think that's enough of the heavy s**t for today, you don't need my issues on top of yours. Let's talk about something else."
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 7:34 pm
Obie smiled as Jess shook her head. "It's alright. I understand," she smiled as she took a sip of her coffee. She thought for a moment to press the issue and offer to listen to her. But surely Jess would not want a seventeen year old to help her solve her problems.
"May I ask... what can be done about this crazy kid, Izumi? I just don't understand why it is he is able to get away with the things he does," she asked softly, as her arms began to ache a little.
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 7:45 pm
"Because people are scared of him." She answered honestly. "It's how anyone get's away with things like that, a reign of terror."
She looked out the window again, what she wouldn't give to see that monster put out of his misery. Blinking away the darkness she turned back to Obie.
"The students won7t tell the teachers and the teachers won't tell the police. There is little the police will do here anyway." She sighed. "It is a vicious circle. I'm trying to think of something, but short of beating him to a bloody pulp. I can't think of anything."
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 7:54 pm
Obie frowned, then snorted at Jess's words. "He almost killed himself anyways," she said, shuddering as that image slipped back into her mind. Again the look on Nato's face sprang to the forefront, and she could feel the icy cold fingers of fear slipping back into her. Maybe it really was better for her to write him a note and disappear. She didn't want to think about what might happen if she told him face to face how she felt.
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 8:02 pm
"That's just it though." She said drinking some more coffee. "He's wreckless and irratic, he'll probably end up being his own downfall."
She shrugged again and stared down at the table.
"If he hurts many more people though, I might have to take matters into my own hands. Not something I want to do."
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Posted: Sun Jul 02, 2006 8:09 pm
Obie looked up at the different tone in Jess's voice. She wasn't exactly sure what Jess could do if even the police wouldn't help them. But something told her to not press the issue any further.
"So where are you going for summer vacation?" she asked, taking a sip of coffee, trying to find a much lighter subject to talk about.
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