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 Posted: Fri May 12, 2006 3:10 pm
"I do not know." She looked back to Demare and her arms dropped to her sides. "I don't know how one determines the authenticity of an emotion expressed by another. Or how those emotions interact."
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Posted: Fri May 12, 2006 3:52 pm
"Huh."
A part of him had hoped she knew. Of course, he couldn't expect her to know everything, since she didn't seem to feel very many emotions at all.
"Eh, I guess I'll figure it out one day, right?" he said, laughing a little bit. "I'm supposed to be just a stupid kid right now, anyway! I don't need to know this stuff! I don't need..."
Oh, who was he kidding. He wanted to know just as much as anyone else would, child or not.
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Posted: Mon May 15, 2006 10:26 am
"I am not a good person to ask about so-called matters of the heart. I do not always feel things the correct way."
Chandra brushed back a strand of jet black hair from her forehead. She was unaware of Demare's disappointment at her lack of knowledge, but she was frustrated with that same lack of knowledge herself. It seemed to her right now that no one understood emotions and it would be easier for everyone if they simply didn't exist.
"If no one felt anything, there would be no confusion. If emotions could simply be bleached out, all would be well."
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Posted: Mon May 15, 2006 3:00 pm
His wings flinched a little bit, almost not hearing what Chandra had said. Her voice sounded distant for a moment, as if she were far away.
"If no one felt anything..." Demare murmured, his eyes turned to the floor. They seemed more blank than usual, as if he were starting to lose himself, or was in a trance.
She was right. At least, he felt that she was. It was like what he was thinking earlier; that there would actually be peace if no one felt anything. If there were no emotions. If everything was... just... hallow.
"Perhaps... that's all I need to do," he said aloud without realizing. "Perhaps I just need to be rid of these ridiculous things called feelings, and everything would be fine again."
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Posted: Tue May 16, 2006 7:10 am
"I was without my own feelings for a while," Chandra stood and turned away from Demare, beginning to pace slowly. "But I am not sure how it was accomplished. I am sure it is beyond the sphere of my abilities."
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Posted: Tue May 16, 2006 3:36 pm
This perked the child's interest, his eyes finally turning back to the woman he was speaking to. She was without her emotions...? Could it then be really possible to erase his own?
"You're sure?" Demare couldn't help but question. "Are you sure you don't remember how it was done?"
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Posted: Thu May 18, 2006 7:56 pm
Chandra's eyes grew unfocused as she thought back to the original incident. Mictecacihuatl had grabbed her somehow, not just physically but inside and wrenched - she had blacked out when the pain grew too much to handle.
"I am sure I would not be able to recreate the experience. I blacked out before it was finished. It started, however, with her grabbing something inside me - not physically inside, but mentally or spiritually ... " The teenage female trailed off, her eyes re-focusing.
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Posted: Thu May 18, 2006 11:37 pm
The halfling pondered what it was that could have been done. Grabbing something on the inside...? But what could possibly come from within? The mind played a part in some emotions, but she couldn't have shut that down...
Of course.
"Perhaps it's something dealing with the heart," Demare suggested, speaking more to himself than to Chandra. "If you were stripped of emotions... perhaps you were dead?"
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Posted: Fri May 19, 2006 5:40 am
"I hover always at the edge of Death," Chandra agreed comfortably. "If the body I inhabit has something to do with the emotions I am capable of - it might be easy to remove them. I do not believe the Dead are entirely without emotion, however. If they remember themselves and are aware of their surroundings, they have some pale shadow of the emotions I have observed among the Living. More like a poor memory than the real thing, but present."
She shrugged fluidly.
"Perhaps to be without emotion you must become not what you are. It may be a curse of being human."
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Posted: Fri May 19, 2006 11:50 am
Demare couldn't help his chuckle at the thought. Become something he wasn't... Would he and Clare just need to switch places? Or would they have to change the body completely? ...Or their very souls?
"Perhaps... but I believe it may be a curse for all living things," he stated, closing his eyes for a moment. "I'm not human, after all... Mortal, but not human. Perhaps to counter his research, I'll do a bit of my own... Maybe I'll even make it a game to see who can find their answers faster."
Or maybe he wouldn't. Demian knew of his own habits, and he figured he'd ruin his own research in one way or another. He could always try to manipulate Clare into finding the answers FOR him...
"There is a curious question I've had running in the back of my mind, however. You said 'this body'. Are you saying that you've had more than one now?"
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Posted: Fri May 19, 2006 12:47 pm
"I have." She sat back down on the couch and folded her hands in her lap. "My body has been destroyed beyond the point where it makes a suitable vessel twice. The first time I did not have to find a new body on my own, but the second time I did. I ... built this one with considerable difficulty. It is necessary for me to have a physical anchor in the Land of the Living or I would be trapped in the Land of the Dead."
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Posted: Fri May 19, 2006 12:57 pm
This perked an interest Demare wasn't aware of. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he wanted to know more... Was this Clare's doing, or his own?
"You had to make your own body...?" he questioned, his left eye widening a little bit with curiousity. For a moment, a different voice leaked out, a faint but audible whisper.
"Can you make any body, or only your own?"
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Posted: Fri May 19, 2006 1:28 pm
That gave Chandra pause and she stared hard at Demare for a while before answering. It was a suspicious question in her mind, although she had a feeling she knew why it was being asked.
"Hypothetically I could create a body and anchor a spirit other than my own in it, but I am not sure I am ready to do it in practice. I was successful in this instance because of my will to survive - and my starting material was fresh. Bodies of the newly Dead are easiest to reanimate."
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Posted: Fri May 19, 2006 1:39 pm
Demare didn't seem to notice the other voice at all. It was as if it were completely blocked from his ears. His head, however, was beginning to hurt a little, a small throbbing pain emitting from the left side.
"You can raise the dead??" he asked, this seeming to be more interesting to him. "I knew you could walk amoung them, but I didn't know your power had grown..."
"Would it be possible to teach someone this ability...? Or is it something natural within you alone, something that's a part of your own soul...?" the voice came again.
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Posted: Fri May 19, 2006 1:53 pm
"Only for short periods of time," it came out clipped, an admission she didn't want to make. "And only the body itself. I cannot yet pull a soul from the Land of the Dead and return it here."
She shook her head slightly from side to side at the second voice.
"I believe it is something unique to myself from things I have read in the Book of the Dead." She stroked its smooth surface, almost absently. "But I have seen others do similar and more powerful feats, so I have to assume it can be done at greater cost by those not born to it."
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