She felt ashamed for doubting Wolframite, for thinking that he would cheat on her with old flings, or even Tinaksite when he was supposed to be out on patrol. It was unfair of her to think that way, like she was being replaced, especially since he hadn’t exhibited any of those behaviors in the six months they had been together. If anything he had quite literally told one to piss off if she remembered correctly. Yet this possessiveness she felt made her jump to these horrible conclusions despite his reassurances and it wasn’t fair to him.
It would be easy enough to point the finger and blame her youma side for this behavior. But there would be no knowing for sure since he was her first boyfriend, her first kiss, her first of many things. It might just be a part of herself she never knew existed.
The guilt felt like a heavy mantle had been placed across her shoulders, the weight of which made it felt like she was drowning in the thick of it. If he hadn’t walked away and instead continued to lean against them Laven was sure she would have broken down right then and there rather than think things through calmly as she would have normally done.
“He’s right,” her voice was quieter than normal while her downcast shifting gaze gave away the fact she was still overthinking and trying to process the information. “Decision like this need time.” She looked up at Tinaksite and offered a rueful smile. “I don’t want you to sacrifice your freedoms. You’re always welcome to come to visit us in the barracks and once the house is complete you can stay in one of the guest bedrooms.” Laven glanced over at Wolframite for his approval.
Even if she couldn’t quite reciprocate Tina’s feelings in the same way, she didn’t want to close the door on her friend or make her feel unwelcome. “Plus, I need someone I can trust to keep him out of trouble when I can’t be there.” Her lips twitched in an awkward half-smile but at least she was trying to slay the white elephant in the room and bring back some normalcy to their typical interactions.
