"I can't believe this is on her wishlist," Wallace said to himself, eyeing the scrap of paper in his hand.

For practical reasons- because he was absolutely always practical- he liked to do his Christmas shopping well ahead of time. He already had his family gifts planned and purchased: a snorkel set for Becky, a new video game for Louie, a gift certificate at a nice restaurant for Sally, along with a bottle of wine that would serve as her birthday gift the following week, and a spa treatment for his mother, who was always in need of a little pampering. All of their gifts were pretty nice, easy to prepare, and no trouble at all once he decided what he was doing.

His friends were a little trickier. He didn't know enough about Steven to pick something really nice, so he ended up buying a pair of scrubs with a fun, guinea pig print. Roxanne was much easier- all she needed was something suitably sparkly, so he got her a box of rhinestones, all shapes and sizes, with a warning that if he found any of them on his clothes, he'd confiscate the lot of them. That just left Flannery, and shopping for her was a hassle. Just like dealing with her in most respects was a hassle.

The obvious choice was, of course, pirate gear. But that had problems of its own. For one, Wallace had no idea what pirate gear she already had, and what she was hoping for. Moreover, he had no interest in supporting her inane daydream that she was somehow a seafarer, especially when she didn't even know how to swim. Swimming lessons might have been a good choice, except for the fact that she never showed much of an interest in learning how to swim. Whenever he offered to teach her, she'd just pat him on the shoulder and cheerily announce that he would save her if she was ever drowning, so it was fine!

But with piratical supplies off the table, Wallace really didn't know what to get for her. Getting nothing was not an option, especially now that they were sharing a place. The best reaction he could hope for in that scenario would be her mercilessly teasing him about it for the next year. The worst case was too horrible to even think about.

Maybe that was why she'd given him the list, scrawled on a piece of paper from a notepad shaped like a skull and crossbones. It probably consisted of the first half dozen things that came into her head while she was writing. The first thing on the list was A Really Cool Hat, and Wallace had no idea what that was supposed to mean. Was it a pirate hat? But she already had at least four of those. Maybe she wanted a cool non-piratey hat? What would she even like in a hat?

He didn't know, but perhaps the people at the hat store in the mall would. It was closer to Christmas than he'd planned when he set out in search of the shop. Or the mall. Or even downtown Destiny City.

How he ended up at a gas station on the other side of town was kind of beyond him. Such mishaps were common for him, but that didn't mean he knew how they came about, or how to prevent them. All he knew was that his shopping plans were ruined- or were they?

On the wall in the gas station's shop was a row of Mess Trucks. And sure enough, on her list: "The Mess Truck's back and it's better than ever!" she had written.

"I will never understand you," he muttered, tucking a Mess Truck under his arm as he headed towards the register, relieved to call it a day.