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 Posted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 3:18 am
Thanks! Just taking it one day at a time.
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Posted: Wed Jul 06, 2011 7:55 am
Sorry to hear about the anxiousness, but yeah, the jump can be a little intimidating, but that's not the important part.
Its the landing that can cause trouble.
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Posted: Wed Jul 13, 2011 8:41 pm
Indeed!
Well, we're all feeling pretty good at the moment. Not making too many physical steps forward, but lots of good discussion going on.
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Posted: Sun Jul 17, 2011 11:44 pm
Bahhh.
Spending more time with W, the friend, is letting feelings--physical and emotional--develop further. That's getting stressful, because my partner isn't really for that relationship to go further yet (and fair enough!). Just feeling a bit funny.
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Posted: Mon Jul 18, 2011 9:35 am
I think you may need to talk about things with W again then. He probably can't be much help for the further development of his feelings, but the expression and physical acting on it he can try to reign back a bit. Perhaps also talking to F again, explain that you're position and your stress and work together to find a solution. Maybe even talk to W and F together about it so everyone can be on the same page and try to help lessen the stress involved?
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Posted: Mon Jul 18, 2011 4:03 pm
Mameoyashi I think you may need to talk about things with W again then. He probably can't be much help for the further development of his feelings, but the expression and physical acting on it he can try to reign back a bit. Perhaps also talking to F again, explain that you're position and your stress and work together to find a solution. Maybe even talk to W and F together about it so everyone can be on the same page and try to help lessen the stress involved? Done & done! W and I had lunch the other day and decided to put our sleepovers on hold for a while--just to take away the temptation, really, until we feel we can manage it better. Updated F on that, of course, who says he trusts me to use my own judgement. I know it'll be super awkward talking to both of them, but that's gotta happen, yes. Have planned dinner--just to hang out. Then we can talk about it together when they're feeling more comfy with one another.
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Posted: Mon Jul 18, 2011 4:22 pm
Fizzlesticks Done & done! W and I had lunch the other day and decided to put our sleepovers on hold for a while--just to take away the temptation, really, until we feel we can manage it better. Updated F on that, of course, who says he trusts me to use my own judgement. I know it'll be super awkward talking to both of them, but that's gotta happen, yes. Have planned dinner--just to hang out. Then we can talk about it together when they're feeling more comfy with one another. That sounds really responsible! I hope it works out for you all.
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Posted: Mon Jul 18, 2011 4:27 pm
Esiris That sounds really responsible! I hope it works out for you all. Thanks. smile Doing my best. It feels ludicrous being in the middle of these two fantastic men, both of whom are relearning the whole way they do relationships just because I asked them too. I think one of the keys to me feeling okay about it all is making sure there's benefits for them too.
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Posted: Tue Aug 02, 2011 1:45 am
Well, it's all going surprisingly well.
F isn't ready for my relationship with W to be sexual, but he *is* aware--in fact, made me really realise--that it definitely is an intimate relationship. He feels like they're both primary and he feels totally comfortable with that.
So things with F are rad. We're doing lots of reading and talking and writing together, and I feel like everything's going to be sorted out in time.
W is more of a pickle, but I'm getting so much better at being honest about what I feel/want/need. We'll get there. There are fewer and fewer awkwards and more moments of clarity.
The toughie at the moment is managing the sexual tension between W and I without compromising any relationships.
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Posted: Tue Aug 02, 2011 2:32 am
Fizzlesticks Well, it's all going surprisingly well. F isn't ready for my relationship with W to be sexual, but he *is* aware--in fact, made me really realise--that it definitely is an intimate relationship. He feels like they're both primary and he feels totally comfortable with that. So things with F are rad. We're doing lots of reading and talking and writing together, and I feel like everything's going to be sorted out in time. W is more of a pickle, but I'm getting so much better at being honest about what I feel/want/need. We'll get there. There are fewer and fewer awkwards and more moments of clarity. The toughie at the moment is managing the sexual tension between W and I without compromising any relationships. Happy for you Fizzy! 4laugh
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Posted: Tue Aug 02, 2011 2:26 pm
Fantastic Fiz smile Glad to hear things are getting better and better. biggrin
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Posted: Tue Aug 02, 2011 11:08 pm
Mameoyashi Fantastic Fiz smile Glad to hear things are getting better and better. biggrin And sometimes more and more complicated! I am so glad for F and I to take our time and be patient with one another, but we are in a weird in-between space with W. It is sometimes awkward and often arousing.
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Posted: Sun Aug 07, 2011 6:40 am
Rant rant.
Low-grade consistent anxiety at the moment, and I think W's "gone funny." Or it could just be me being paranoid (and I didask--said he's fine). Hard to tell. Gah.
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Posted: Sun Aug 07, 2011 8:28 am
Fizzlesticks Rant rant. Low-grade consistent anxiety at the moment, and I think W's "gone funny." Or it could just be me being paranoid (and I didask--said he's fine). Hard to tell. Gah. Are you taking anything for it? The anxiety I mean.
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Posted: Sun Aug 07, 2011 6:31 pm
Esiris Fizzlesticks Rant rant. Low-grade consistent anxiety at the moment, and I think W's "gone funny." Or it could just be me being paranoid (and I didask--said he's fine). Hard to tell. Gah. Are you taking anything for it? The anxiety I mean. I've seen the same (fantastic) psychologist for years, but I'm not taking anything for the anxiety. It tends to come and go.
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