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 Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 11:53 am
I sadly run into the ones who mean it hostilely more often than I hear it from those with good intentions. On my college campus, there's religious people handing out stuff all the time. I've noticed that when someone politely rejects handouts with a statement such as, "No thanks, I'm Catholic/Muslim/insert other religion here," the other person usually doesn't make an issue of it. I've said, "No thanks, I'm an atheist," and oh man. I'm not doing that anymore. I get verbally slaughtered. Some of them didn't pray for my soul in that case, they told me I was flat out damned. I've always just ignored those kind of folks...no need to make a scene.
That's why I only respond to those who I can tell are wishing me well during hard times, not trying to give me a hard time. xp
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Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 12:09 pm
In those cases, do a maniacal laugh. If possible, one of the deep throated super-villain laughs do nicely. LOL
Anyway, in those kinda situations, people are really just pushing you for a bad reaction. I think you do the right thing when you pretend they didn't say anything at all. A mental MUTE button is wonderful thing to develop. Those people need to feel vindicated in their beliefs that you are going to their definition of eternity, and if they provoke a negative reaction from you, it just strengthens their delusions that there is REALLY something wrong you.
When you asked your initial question, it just reminded me of some of the instances where other people of my faith decided to be condescending to me for my marriage, and then people of his faith treating me the same way later. There is no call for that. These were all interactions had with other individuals though, not groups proselytizing.
I welcome any form of well-wishing if it is sincere. I don't mind the insincere ones too much, because those people are at least attempting to console or congratulate, even if it is not within themselves to mean it. I at least respect the effort.
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Posted: Sat Jul 03, 2010 12:49 pm
That kind of reminds me of the funeral I went to a few days ago. Granted, I am essentially an atheist but I was angry that the preacher doing the service only mentioned the deceased for like five minutes. The rest of the hour, he went off about how we were all damned unless we submitted ourselves to Jesus and good people don't get into heaven, God doesn't care about good people he only cares that you submit yourself to his will, etc.
We get to the actual cemetery from the funeral home and they do the whole military salute, Preacher comes back. Mentions one sentence about the military (none whatsoever about the deceased) and starts going on about how we needed to worship Jesus this specific way or we're going to hell.
The rest of the family seemed just fine with it, they just blamed me being angry on the fact that I was an atheist and needed saved anyways. Thing is, it seems just downright rude to not memorialize a person during their funeral but instead use the opportunity to try to recruit. It should have been the other away around, to my way of thinking.
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Posted: Mon Jul 12, 2010 7:21 pm
When I first denounced my Christian faith and became an Athiest, every "God bless you" made me flinch like I'd been slapped. I was still insecure about "turning my back on God", as a so-called friend from my old church so elequently put it, and the small part of me that still thought I should've just stamped out the doubt I was feeling and not rock the boat kept telling me that I wasn't worthy of hearing these kind of nice things, they wouldn't want to pray for me if they knew what I was. I did stamp out my doubt, actually, just not the doubt they expected...
Well, enough of me trying to make myself sound like a poster-child for people doubting their religion. The point is, I am now confident enough to say that having people want their God to favor you, it's meant as a compliment and should be recieved as one. I would expect the same silent acceptance of a Jew who is wished a Merry Christmas.
And as for the people who do it with sarcasm, I have nothing to offer them other than a smile and a promise that if I am indeed going to hell, I will be seeing them there.
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Posted: Wed Jul 28, 2010 10:23 am
There's still situations I have no clue how to respond to. I was at the doctor today for my yearly check-up. I expressed concerns about my height and weight, and the doctor told me a few times not to worry because "it's just the way God made you." It's not something I can really say "thank you" to like a prayer. I just said nothing, as usual. =/
It's a lot more uncomfortable for me when the religious person expressing their beliefs is a professional. For instance, the ob/gyn practice in town is run by two Catholics and I'm hesitant to reveal my sexual orientation (not that I'd need to unless I'm sexually active, and with a woman at that), but I have that fear that a religious professional is going to judge me. The few times I've had to stay in the hospital here, they've always sent a chaplain to my room and I never knew what to do.
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Posted: Thu Jul 29, 2010 9:12 am
h y p o c h r i s t i There's still situations I have no clue how to respond to. I was at the doctor today for my yearly check-up. I expressed concerns about my height and weight, and the doctor told me a few times not to worry because "it's just the way God made you." It's not something I can really say "thank you" to like a prayer. I just said nothing, as usual. =/
It's a lot more uncomfortable for me when the religious person expressing their beliefs is a professional. For instance, the ob/gyn practice in town is run by two Catholics and I'm hesitant to reveal my sexual orientation (not that I'd need to unless I'm sexually active, and with a woman at that), but I have that fear that a religious professional is going to judge me. The few times I've had to stay in the hospital here, they've always sent a chaplain to my room and I never knew what to do. You could just interpret it as a secular expression for "accept yourself for the way you are". I don't think the doctor is trying to push his/her religious views on you but just using expressions s/he's familiar with to give you comfort about your concerns. Concerning the ob/gyn clinic if they judge you for your orientation so what? People judge others all the time it's not unique to just religious individuals. I know quite a few atheists who think I'm stupid or a sheep because I'm a Christian. Or who look at me with pity because I'm religious yet "so smart". Now if they actually refuse service to you or verbally abuse you because of your orientation or irreligious views, you should be able to pursue legal action against them. This applies to any person, even those in professional positions.
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Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 12:06 pm
HEY ATHIESTS
explain plz:
a girl from my church had developed strep throat. it went undiscovered and developed into some disease that went to her brain. she lost the ability to speak, walk, or do anything be herself. our entire church community began praying and stuff, during our services on sunday, wednesday, and individually. doctor said it would take years for her to regain close to normal brain function. however, a couple months later, she was back to almost normal, she could talk smile, laugh, and things like that. a few more months passed and she was running around her house, and doing everything a normal 5-6 year old would do (yeah she was around 5 i think). please explain how anything other that God did that. science doesnt work like that. science is consistant.
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Posted: Tue Aug 10, 2010 4:28 am
I don't know how we're supposed to explain much. You've been pretty vague on the details--
"some disease that went to her brain," "praying and stuff," "a normal 5-6 year old would do (she was around 5 I think)"...
You don't seem to know too much about this either. Unless I know what kind of disease she actually had, I have no idea whether "a couple months" is an impressive recovery period.
stare *wary of potential troll*
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Posted: Thu Aug 19, 2010 7:01 pm
I would say that the saying is a more religious way of, say, when someone sneezes they say "bless you." They, that is, the Christians/whoever may say it, do not mean to impose the beliefs on you. Simply, they are conveying their care for you.
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Posted: Sat Sep 04, 2010 11:52 am
h y p o c h r i s t i Whenever something unfortunate happens, I have people tell me, "You're in my prayers," or "It's God's will," "Bless you," etc.
I've always felt really uncomfortable saying thank you (most of the time I have anyway to avoid looking unappreciative), but I don't know if it's my place to speak up. Do I have the right to convey that I don't want prayer or religious statements? I'm afraid that even "I appreciate your sentiments, but I'm nonreligious" could come across as rude.
Surely this is a situation some of you encounter as well, so how do you respond?
If people do not know your religious or nonreligious practice, good manners states that one must smile and thank them for their kindness. If the people do know, but choose to say things like this anyway, have a candid talk with them about what you would prefer. However, if they want to pray for you, you shouldn't deny them that expression of their faith.
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Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2010 2:24 pm
I think you should say thank you and be happy with that.
These people's intentions are good, and nothing they are doing is explicitly hurting you. So... Why not? xp
If a person says to a Christian "I will pray to Allah that you will be alright" does the Christian have to say "Thank you, but I do not believe that Islam is the unquestionable faith in existence."
It's really not that big of a deal, regardless of how strongly you believe something, imo.
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Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2010 4:20 pm
I just blink, stare at, and then raise an eyebrow whenever someone says that they'll pray for me or that I'll be in their prayers. It doesn't happen to me often because my classmates for some reason or other think I'm Mormon... Don't know what put that idea in their heads. And when I say I'm agnostic because of them asking me if I'm Mormon, they look at me all confused and ask "What's that?" and I explain it to them and then they say "Oh." and turn back to what they were doing before. I don't know whether to find their stupidity funny or sad.
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2010 5:25 pm
cwilder725 I just blink, stare at, and then raise an eyebrow whenever someone says that they'll pray for me or that I'll be in their prayers. It doesn't happen to me often because my classmates for some reason or other think I'm Mormon... Don't know what put that idea in their heads. And when I say I'm agnostic because of them asking me if I'm Mormon, they look at me all confused and ask "What's that?" and I explain it to them and then they say "Oh." and turn back to what they were doing before. I don't know whether to find their stupidity funny or sad. I believe they have a cream for that now.
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Posted: Wed Jan 05, 2011 5:19 pm
R3s1st4nc3 HEY ATHIESTS explain plz: a girl from my church had developed strep throat. it went undiscovered and developed into some disease that went to her brain. she lost the ability to speak, walk, or do anything be herself. our entire church community began praying and stuff, during our services on sunday, wednesday, and individually. doctor said it would take years for her to regain close to normal brain function. however, a couple months later, she was back to almost normal, she could talk smile, laugh, and things like that. a few more months passed and she was running around her house, and doing everything a normal 5-6 year old would do (yeah she was around 5 i think). please explain how anything other that God did that. science doesnt work like that. science is consistant. I'd like to disagree that any of that is a a reason to prove the existence of God, assuming there's a polite way to do so. While I agree that the girl's recovery probably would be called a "miracle" even by scientific standards, this proves nothing. Keep in mind that in Ancient Greece, they said Zeus was responsible for lightning. Why did they do this? Because there was no explanation in that age's science for how it happened. So even if science in this age can't tell us why that girl survived, it doesen't instantly mean there was divine intervention at hand.
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Posted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 4:55 am
R3s1st4nc3 HEY ATHIESTS explain plz: a girl from my church had developed strep throat. it went undiscovered and developed into some disease that went to her brain. she lost the ability to speak, walk, or do anything be herself. our entire church community began praying and stuff, during our services on sunday, wednesday, and individually. doctor said it would take years for her to regain close to normal brain function. however, a couple months later, she was back to almost normal, she could talk smile, laugh, and things like that. a few more months passed and she was running around her house, and doing everything a normal 5-6 year old would do (yeah she was around 5 i think). please explain how anything other that God did that. science doesnt work like that. science is consistant. Wow, someone was sick and then they got better! That never happens!
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