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 Posted: Sat Mar 01, 2008 12:42 pm
Do you drink your tea straight? Because maybe I'm wierd but I only like it with lemon and sugar.
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Posted: Mon Mar 03, 2008 5:06 am
Sailor Jerry Do you drink your tea straight? Because maybe I'm wierd but I only like it with lemon and sugar. Uh, I can't stand it with anything other then 1 or 2 tea candies. I like it straight too.
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Posted: Mon Mar 03, 2008 6:09 am
Sailor Jerry Hotaru230 I still act pretty much the same, except maybe sew more and try to alter stuff more. But I was going towards that anyways with my cosplay stuff. I'm too lazy to be lolita all the time. I wear it for special ocasions and it takes me 4 EVER to get myself ready. But I would like to get enough pieces and used to wear it so that I would wear it once a week. Right now maybe I'm at like once every 2 weeks or once a month. Doesn't that seem kinda sad. sad *remember that she still needs to repaint her white shoes* eek You paint shoes? I've only used leather dye before, but never paint. (And not even that very much because the vegan in me wants to get rid of my leather shoes.) P.S. I like your signature. well I found these cute mary janes in a second-hand store, but they were a dark tan and I needed white shoes to go with some of my outfits. so I tried painting them with white acrylic paint, but the paint chipped when I wore them. lucky you couldn't tell in the pics! sweatdrop but I plan to try to spray them with white floral paint in hopes that it will work better. and before anyone askes/suggests, yes I did use clear coat on top of the paint and it still chipped. stressed thanks on the siggy! heart the Misa and Light are me and my mule and L is a friend of mine.
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Posted: Mon Mar 03, 2008 10:30 am
Funny. I just had a conversation with not one but two other people about the idea of strict rules in fashion and "groups" in the United States this past week. Damn us and our insane need for classification and stratification into cliques and labels. Ohvell.
It's nice to get Yuki-Neko's perspective on this, too, since ... well ... most of us are foreigners looking into Japan with that ethnocentricity in mind. We see what we want, interpret things the way we think is "normal" and spit it back out with our own biases colored all on top. Nice to get a viewpoint that isn't retouched by culture.
Anyway.
Back on-topic.
I've got to say that I haven't really "given anything up" for lolita. I personally think that changing your original tastes, likes and needs for the sake of what you're wearing is very silly. You wear what you like, not change yourself so that you like what you wear, right? I'm sure everyone's fed up with me giving this spiel at this point, but it's valid, so I'm going to try and make things quick and concise for once.
Lolita, for me, is not a lifestyle that has a strictly established set of rules. It is a fashion, sure, and the fashion has its own dictates for what is or is not lolita, but nowhere in there does it say that lolitas have to drink tea, eat candies and say "gosh" instead of "dammit" or another word equally strong. Even the rules for the fashion are relatively fluid on a wearable basis, as Yuki-Neko and Amanikitty have already discussed. In any case, the idea of turning into another person just for the sake of your clothing feels not only shallow, but empty and a bit sad. Forcing yourself to change everything you say, feel or do feels wrong.
You're not indulging yourself anymore, as you should be with such a luxurious fashion, but covering yourself up and hiding yourself behind the facade. It's okay, naturally, to pick up new likes and interests or to gradually leave behind old ones as you find something better, but to convert yourself into a new "ideal" lolita sounds very much like the makings of a personality disorder-to-be.
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Posted: Mon Mar 03, 2008 4:43 pm
spuntino Funny. I just had a conversation with not one but two other people about the idea of strict rules in fashion and "groups" in the United States this past week. Damn us and our insane need for classification and stratification into cliques and labels. Ohvell.
It's nice to get Yuki-Neko's perspective on this, too, since ... well ... most of us are foreigners looking into Japan with that ethnocentricity in mind. We see what we want, interpret things the way we think is "normal" and spit it back out with our own biases colored all on top. Nice to get a viewpoint that isn't retouched by culture.
Anyway.
Back on-topic.
I've got to say that I haven't really "given anything up" for lolita. I personally think that changing your original tastes, likes and needs for the sake of what you're wearing is very silly. You wear what you like, not change yourself so that you like what you wear, right? I'm sure everyone's fed up with me giving this spiel at this point, but it's valid, so I'm going to try and make things quick and concise for once.
Lolita, for me, is not a lifestyle that has a strictly established set of rules. It is a fashion, sure, and the fashion has its own dictates for what is or is not lolita, but nowhere in there does it say that lolitas have to drink tea, eat candies and say "gosh" instead of "dammit" or another word equally strong. Even the rules for the fashion are relatively fluid on a wearable basis, as Yuki-Neko and Amanikitty have already discussed. In any case, the idea of turning into another person just for the sake of your clothing feels not only shallow, but empty and a bit sad. Forcing yourself to change everything you say, feel or do feels wrong.
You're not indulging yourself anymore, as you should be with such a luxurious fashion, but covering yourself up and hiding yourself behind the facade. It's okay, naturally, to pick up new likes and interests or to gradually leave behind old ones as you find something better, but to convert yourself into a new "ideal" lolita sounds very much like the makings of a personality disorder-to-be.
That is my thoughts. My Example My mother is a big Visual Kei fan, and has since before I was born. So I grew up with it, and I love it too. All my life I was a VK rocker girl. But then I started to like a new style too, lolita. Did I give up my rocker/visual kei life when I started to like lolita? No! I still dress punk/rock but I also mix in my lolita style a little. Somedays I will feel like dressing all punk or goth, and some I'll mix those into lolita. Other days I will like to be in all pink, but at the same time I always make it my own style with my hair and piercings. Sometimes I feel like covering them and being nice and sweet, other days I don't. I have loads of piercings (29 to be exact) and I like gore, I swear, I make sexual/teen/sick jokes, im sloppy and all that stuff. Just because I like sweet lolita dosn't mean I have to give up who I am. As spuntino said sometimes you come across new things that interest you more and those things replace your old favorite things. but if you are thinking "I want to be lolita so I HAVE to stop swearing, I HAVE to act this way or I HAVE to like tea and drink it all the time" then, maybe I think you should slow down, find out who YOU are and then figure out all the things you like, and make your own style. I have acctualy looked at some of the guides that people use, like the ones on livejournal, I think the best one is this one http://lolita-handbook.livejournal.com/3035.html because it's not "It has to be like this", its very generalized which i think is good, because everyone should be making it there own style suited to what they like it to look like, not what people say it has to look like. Anyway, I'm ranting, but i feel strong for this because I am really pro-personal style and self expression through style. ps. also sorry if things make no sence, english is hard sweatdrop
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Posted: Mon Mar 03, 2008 6:00 pm
Nope! You make perfect sense. (:
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Posted: Tue Mar 04, 2008 7:03 am
-C'est la lune qui conduit la danse...-
Don't worry, your English is fine. biggrin
It's pretty much the same with me. When I do Lolita casually I tend to mix in my Hip-hop/Urban style into my outfits, since that is what I grew up with besides my childhood infatuation with the Victorian style. But usually when I go all-out I wouldn't mix things too much.
I drink tea, I bake things, I draw, I paint, but that was always a part of me. I'm an artist. I like to create things on my free time. And especially now that I have small health problems I drink tea a bit more often than before.
Though, I'm probably one of the loudest and silliest of the NYC lolitas, I curse too much (NYers are born saying "********", didn't you know), I eat pizza and other sloppy crap in my clothes sometimes, I flatten my petticoats playing video games all day, and the list goes on.
I would never give up my lifestyle for the sake of fashion. I don't need to be "ghetto" or constantly listen to 50 cent and the crap music Rap has out today, nor do I need to do certain things to have a pre-made "lolita lifestyle". Even 'Princess Skye' have her own way of living and does not always live up to the lifestyle outlook she's created.
People always want to be "unique" in this fashion subculture yet they don't know how to do it. And having a false outlook at the Lolita "lifestyle" or it's influences doesn't help at all.
-...quand le soleil sera couché dans ton âme froide.-
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Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2008 5:48 am
My choice of clothing has changed a bit, too.
A few years ago I loved loud colors, when I entered a room it was like "BANG! Rescue my eyes!". I also had no real sense for styling myself.
Meanwhile I found the style I feel comfortable in and of which I think suits me best. Fortunately my normal style goes well with lolita, it's pretty classic but cute. It has a few loli-influences but I always try not to be too lolita because I don't want to be one-sided.
But I never got rid off more than my old clothes just because I like Lolita.
I still don't drink more tea than usual, I don't behave differently, I don't listen to other music, I still swear or whatever. Lolita is a part of me, I AM like that, so it can impossibly change me.
I also like that Lolita in western countries turns into a lifestyle.
I never felt wanted or comfortable in other scenes like Gothic, Visual Kei etc.
For the first time I say "Hey, that's it. This is me". I feel home now.
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Posted: Tue Mar 18, 2008 5:13 pm
I don't see why you'd have to give up clothing, because it's not like being Lolita requires you to dress that way every day.. As for lifestyle habits again, even if something is not included in what some consider the "loli lifestyle" (like drinking coffee), it's not like practicing those habits will diminish your Loli look or knowledge of the fashion. Therefore, I don't see that these habits will make you "un-loli", so I don't see why anyone would have to give them up. With an exception of habits that totally defy Loli, like flashing people or doing something skanky XD I don't really put drinking coffee in that same realm..
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Posted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 9:11 pm
Warning......... a bit angsty but true! If the mods want to remove it... feel free..... I wrote this while upset.
Honestly..... I gave up most of my family...... It sounds terrible but........ I love being a lolita.. heart .. and I love my family.. crying .... My choice was to either give up a part of my self or leave my father and step mother.. stare .. *giggles uncontrollably* any of you have someone tell you that you live in a dream world because of the way you dress? Your odd little habits? I like tea, lace, dolls, sweets, sewing and drawing.... Does that make me bad? Insane? Any of you have someone try to have you commited because they don't like the little pieces of you? scream Anger, disgust, and a desire for revenge is not a pretty trait for a lolita.......but it's still here inside me................... ever want to rip something out of you just to make things okay? I tried that.... tried to change who and WHAT I was for them.... Don't ever... EVER do that... even for family... you suffer, die inside, feel hatred to those who forced you to it...even if you once loved them.... stressed xp crying stare
So yes.... I chose being a lolita over all....
I guess what I want to say is..... Be yourself, love yourself, and for the love of all that is sweet and lacey... give up NOTHING that makes you happy.
Take this tale as you will... I will ignore insults and flames....plz try to take this as a..... I don't know.... Lesson? Cautionary tale?.... Any ways....
Hugs, Tea and candy to all heart .
Bridgit (Yuriko)
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Posted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 9:16 pm
.......................>< gods I sound whiny......... oh well..........
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Posted: Sat Mar 22, 2008 11:08 pm
It's okay Yuriko. You had to let it out and here was where you put it, I can understand that. I've never had to deal with that, my family has let me be me all my life. I always knew I was different and they let me explore, but I didn't find Loli until about a year ago. It was one of those "This is me, that is what I was supposed to be in." A month ago when I got my first outfit in the mail nothing felt better.
Changes I have made: My hair. I got it cut. Nothing big, just a few changes like short layers and it's a little shorter then I have had before just to keep it neat looking. I am very low maintenance. But other then that, I am me and people can take it as it is.
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