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 Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 8:58 am
Digital Malevolence No, the most affectionate thing I can stand is a hug and holding hands and that shitty junk. kissing and anything beyond that repulses me......I'm doomed to be alone. Wow, you are the million dollar virgin xd btw, i liked ur other avi better =)
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Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 12:03 pm
Lomedin Digital Malevolence No, the most affectionate thing I can stand is a hug and holding hands and that shitty junk. kissing and anything beyond that repulses me......I'm doomed to be alone. Wow, you are the million dollar virgin xd btw, i liked ur other avi better =) More. and yeah, I changed my avi back to the origional way I had it...for some reason, I like it better then any other. neutral
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Digital Malevolence Vice Captain
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Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 4:03 pm
MegaTherion777 IAmAlwaysHereForYou Well, by waiting away I don't mean that I'm not doing anything and keeping my entire life on hold. I am moving and I do keep going, but the wasting away part is my imagination picturing my life without her. I seriously don't even want to speak of it. When I love someone, I give them everything, I really do. And it's just hard to move on with everything when everything is still with someone else, someone that you still want to give everything to.. damn man...you need to live YOUR life, not an imagined life with someone else. i know this sounds really bad, but i'm a blunt guy. sometimes bluntness helps, sometimes it doesn't. but speaking as a guy who is both blunt and has gone through a similar situation in the last 6 or 7 weeks... move on. if you think you can remain friends, by all means, try, friends are always good; but seriously, grow up, act like a man, and move on. love is not the disney, picture-book, everyone has a soulmate story that hollywood wants us to believe. to quote richard hell: "feelings WILL change, we're helpless, they MUST." people change whether you want them to or not, as a result their feelings for others sometimes change, you just need to deal with it in your life. because you CAN'T make someone change themselves back. you have to open yourself to other options, because if you just pine away for her, you're going to have a miserable ******** life. there are other girls out there, and if one breaks up with you, you are perfectly capable of finding another one. I know that there's not just one person for everyone, otherwise we'd have an even number of people in the world. But even though I understand all of that, I just can't move on. I really can't, and I really don't want to. I can't explain it and I know it sounds absolutely juvenile and retarded to everyone that I'm making myself miserable, but I really don't want to spend my life with anyone but her. I really don't, I just can't explain it. I understand everything you're telling me, but I'd rather be in pain without her than try to pretend being happy with someone else. I still want to be friends with her, but my devotion is with her. And even if I were to change, I don't see it happening for a good five years or so. But enough about this, you guys are going to get pissed off at me for being so close-minded sooner or later.
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Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 5:12 pm
IAmAlwaysHereForYou MegaTherion777 IAmAlwaysHereForYou Well, by waiting away I don't mean that I'm not doing anything and keeping my entire life on hold. I am moving and I do keep going, but the wasting away part is my imagination picturing my life without her. I seriously don't even want to speak of it. When I love someone, I give them everything, I really do. And it's just hard to move on with everything when everything is still with someone else, someone that you still want to give everything to.. damn man...you need to live YOUR life, not an imagined life with someone else. i know this sounds really bad, but i'm a blunt guy. sometimes bluntness helps, sometimes it doesn't. but speaking as a guy who is both blunt and has gone through a similar situation in the last 6 or 7 weeks... move on. if you think you can remain friends, by all means, try, friends are always good; but seriously, grow up, act like a man, and move on. love is not the disney, picture-book, everyone has a soulmate story that hollywood wants us to believe. to quote richard hell: "feelings WILL change, we're helpless, they MUST." people change whether you want them to or not, as a result their feelings for others sometimes change, you just need to deal with it in your life. because you CAN'T make someone change themselves back. you have to open yourself to other options, because if you just pine away for her, you're going to have a miserable ******** life. there are other girls out there, and if one breaks up with you, you are perfectly capable of finding another one. I know that there's not just one person for everyone, otherwise we'd have an even number of people in the world. But even though I understand all of that, I just can't move on. I really can't, and I really don't want to. I can't explain it and I know it sounds absolutely juvenile and retarded to everyone that I'm making myself miserable, but I really don't want to spend my life with anyone but her. I really don't, I just can't explain it. I understand everything you're telling me, but I'd rather be in pain without her than try to pretend being happy with someone else. I still want to be friends with her, but my devotion is with her. And even if I were to change, I don't see it happening for a good five years or so. But enough about this, you guys are going to get pissed off at me for being so close-minded sooner or later. we're not gonna get pissed. i'm just blunt by nature, but i can't truly be angry at someone i've never even met, so don't worry biggrin . but your problem is that not wanting to. you say you'd rather be miserable without her than pretend to be happy with someone else. well if you believe that's what will happen it is - however if you drop that belief, if you start to believe that you can be happy with someone else, it can and will happen. if you simply start wanting to move on, that'll make it easier. but if you don't want to move on, you probably will never be happy again. and i can definitely understand what you're going through with not wanting to move on. but you have to make a choice - to live your life or not. because if you're going to choose to live in the past, you may as well be dead - you'll have no future. trust me, i was in your shoes a while ago, and the same day that i decided to take those shoes off, my life started improving again. you may not be ready for another girl right now, or for a long while even, which is fine. but you do have to stop living in the past if you want to get through.
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Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 5:34 pm
Digital Malevolence Lomedin Digital Malevolence No, the most affectionate thing I can stand is a hug and holding hands and that shitty junk. kissing and anything beyond that repulses me......I'm doomed to be alone. Wow, you are the million dollar virgin xd btw, i liked ur other avi better =) More. and yeah, I changed my avi back to the origional way I had it...for some reason, I like it better then any other. neutral Billion dollars?
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Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 6:54 pm
My Hollow Digital Malevolence Lomedin Digital Malevolence No, the most affectionate thing I can stand is a hug and holding hands and that shitty junk. kissing and anything beyond that repulses me......I'm doomed to be alone. Wow, you are the million dollar virgin xd btw, i liked ur other avi better =) More. and yeah, I changed my avi back to the origional way I had it...for some reason, I like it better then any other. neutral Billion dollars? I dont even know know what thats supposed to mean. emo
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Digital Malevolence Vice Captain
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Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 6:59 pm
Digital Malevolence My Hollow Digital Malevolence Lomedin Digital Malevolence No, the most affectionate thing I can stand is a hug and holding hands and that shitty junk. kissing and anything beyond that repulses me......I'm doomed to be alone. Wow, you are the million dollar virgin xd btw, i liked ur other avi better =) More. and yeah, I changed my avi back to the origional way I had it...for some reason, I like it better then any other. neutral Billion dollars? I dont even know know what thats supposed to mean. emo GO CUT MY GRASS!
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Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 7:33 pm
My Hollow Digital Malevolence My Hollow Digital Malevolence Lomedin Digital Malevolence No, the most affectionate thing I can stand is a hug and holding hands and that shitty junk. kissing and anything beyond that repulses me......I'm doomed to be alone. Wow, you are the million dollar virgin xd btw, i liked ur other avi better =) More. and yeah, I changed my avi back to the origional way I had it...for some reason, I like it better then any other. neutral Billion dollars? I dont even know know what thats supposed to mean. emo GO CUT MY GRASS! I AINT NO IMMIGRANT!!!!! mad
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Digital Malevolence Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 10:57 am
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Posted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 3:27 pm
MegaTherion777 IAmAlwaysHereForYou MegaTherion777 IAmAlwaysHereForYou Well, by waiting away I don't mean that I'm not doing anything and keeping my entire life on hold. I am moving and I do keep going, but the wasting away part is my imagination picturing my life without her. I seriously don't even want to speak of it. When I love someone, I give them everything, I really do. And it's just hard to move on with everything when everything is still with someone else, someone that you still want to give everything to.. damn man...you need to live YOUR life, not an imagined life with someone else. i know this sounds really bad, but i'm a blunt guy. sometimes bluntness helps, sometimes it doesn't. but speaking as a guy who is both blunt and has gone through a similar situation in the last 6 or 7 weeks... move on. if you think you can remain friends, by all means, try, friends are always good; but seriously, grow up, act like a man, and move on. love is not the disney, picture-book, everyone has a soulmate story that hollywood wants us to believe. to quote richard hell: "feelings WILL change, we're helpless, they MUST." people change whether you want them to or not, as a result their feelings for others sometimes change, you just need to deal with it in your life. because you CAN'T make someone change themselves back. you have to open yourself to other options, because if you just pine away for her, you're going to have a miserable ******** life. there are other girls out there, and if one breaks up with you, you are perfectly capable of finding another one. I know that there's not just one person for everyone, otherwise we'd have an even number of people in the world. But even though I understand all of that, I just can't move on. I really can't, and I really don't want to. I can't explain it and I know it sounds absolutely juvenile and retarded to everyone that I'm making myself miserable, but I really don't want to spend my life with anyone but her. I really don't, I just can't explain it. I understand everything you're telling me, but I'd rather be in pain without her than try to pretend being happy with someone else. I still want to be friends with her, but my devotion is with her. And even if I were to change, I don't see it happening for a good five years or so. But enough about this, you guys are going to get pissed off at me for being so close-minded sooner or later. we're not gonna get pissed. i'm just blunt by nature, but i can't truly be angry at someone i've never even met, so don't worry biggrin . but your problem is that not wanting to. you say you'd rather be miserable without her than pretend to be happy with someone else. well if you believe that's what will happen it is - however if you drop that belief, if you start to believe that you can be happy with someone else, it can and will happen. if you simply start wanting to move on, that'll make it easier. but if you don't want to move on, you probably will never be happy again. and i can definitely understand what you're going through with not wanting to move on. but you have to make a choice - to live your life or not. because if you're going to choose to live in the past, you may as well be dead - you'll have no future. trust me, i was in your shoes a while ago, and the same day that i decided to take those shoes off, my life started improving again. you may not be ready for another girl right now, or for a long while even, which is fine. but you do have to stop living in the past if you want to get through. Well I'm glad to hear you won't be pissed or angry with me. That's a bit reassuring. I do know that my life will suck if I live in the past, but like I said and like you confirmed, if I do move on, it won't happen for a very long time. I can't explain it beyond the fact that if I try to forget about her, I'm just going to be more miserable because I'll be breaking my promise to her. No matter what happens, I don't EVER break my promises. And though I have broken a few, it's like scar tissue, my promise comes back even stronger. Thank you for the advice though. Just because I'm not following it right now doesn't mean that I'm desrgarding it completely, I take everything into account.
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Posted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 6:58 pm
IAmAlwaysHereForYou MegaTherion777 IAmAlwaysHereForYou MegaTherion777 IAmAlwaysHereForYou Well, by waiting away I don't mean that I'm not doing anything and keeping my entire life on hold. I am moving and I do keep going, but the wasting away part is my imagination picturing my life without her. I seriously don't even want to speak of it. When I love someone, I give them everything, I really do. And it's just hard to move on with everything when everything is still with someone else, someone that you still want to give everything to.. damn man...you need to live YOUR life, not an imagined life with someone else. i know this sounds really bad, but i'm a blunt guy. sometimes bluntness helps, sometimes it doesn't. but speaking as a guy who is both blunt and has gone through a similar situation in the last 6 or 7 weeks... move on. if you think you can remain friends, by all means, try, friends are always good; but seriously, grow up, act like a man, and move on. love is not the disney, picture-book, everyone has a soulmate story that hollywood wants us to believe. to quote richard hell: "feelings WILL change, we're helpless, they MUST." people change whether you want them to or not, as a result their feelings for others sometimes change, you just need to deal with it in your life. because you CAN'T make someone change themselves back. you have to open yourself to other options, because if you just pine away for her, you're going to have a miserable ******** life. there are other girls out there, and if one breaks up with you, you are perfectly capable of finding another one. I know that there's not just one person for everyone, otherwise we'd have an even number of people in the world. But even though I understand all of that, I just can't move on. I really can't, and I really don't want to. I can't explain it and I know it sounds absolutely juvenile and retarded to everyone that I'm making myself miserable, but I really don't want to spend my life with anyone but her. I really don't, I just can't explain it. I understand everything you're telling me, but I'd rather be in pain without her than try to pretend being happy with someone else. I still want to be friends with her, but my devotion is with her. And even if I were to change, I don't see it happening for a good five years or so. But enough about this, you guys are going to get pissed off at me for being so close-minded sooner or later. we're not gonna get pissed. i'm just blunt by nature, but i can't truly be angry at someone i've never even met, so don't worry biggrin . but your problem is that not wanting to. you say you'd rather be miserable without her than pretend to be happy with someone else. well if you believe that's what will happen it is - however if you drop that belief, if you start to believe that you can be happy with someone else, it can and will happen. if you simply start wanting to move on, that'll make it easier. but if you don't want to move on, you probably will never be happy again. and i can definitely understand what you're going through with not wanting to move on. but you have to make a choice - to live your life or not. because if you're going to choose to live in the past, you may as well be dead - you'll have no future. trust me, i was in your shoes a while ago, and the same day that i decided to take those shoes off, my life started improving again. you may not be ready for another girl right now, or for a long while even, which is fine. but you do have to stop living in the past if you want to get through. Well I'm glad to hear you won't be pissed or angry with me. That's a bit reassuring. I do know that my life will suck if I live in the past, but like I said and like you confirmed, if I do move on, it won't happen for a very long time. I can't explain it beyond the fact that if I try to forget about her, I'm just going to be more miserable because I'll be breaking my promise to her. No matter what happens, I don't EVER break my promises. And though I have broken a few, it's like scar tissue, my promise comes back even stronger. Thank you for the advice though. Just because I'm not following it right now doesn't mean that I'm desrgarding it completely, I take everything into account. yeah i understand and dont TRY to forget her. TRYING just makes it worse. just don't focus on her. focus on your own life, don't focus on her, don't worry about her, just let her live her life. it can be hard, but it'll do you good.
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Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2007 3:06 pm
MegaTherion777 IAmAlwaysHereForYou MegaTherion777 IAmAlwaysHereForYou MegaTherion777 IAmAlwaysHereForYou Well, by waiting away I don't mean that I'm not doing anything and keeping my entire life on hold. I am moving and I do keep going, but the wasting away part is my imagination picturing my life without her. I seriously don't even want to speak of it. When I love someone, I give them everything, I really do. And it's just hard to move on with everything when everything is still with someone else, someone that you still want to give everything to.. damn man...you need to live YOUR life, not an imagined life with someone else. i know this sounds really bad, but i'm a blunt guy. sometimes bluntness helps, sometimes it doesn't. but speaking as a guy who is both blunt and has gone through a similar situation in the last 6 or 7 weeks... move on. if you think you can remain friends, by all means, try, friends are always good; but seriously, grow up, act like a man, and move on. love is not the disney, picture-book, everyone has a soulmate story that hollywood wants us to believe. to quote richard hell: "feelings WILL change, we're helpless, they MUST." people change whether you want them to or not, as a result their feelings for others sometimes change, you just need to deal with it in your life. because you CAN'T make someone change themselves back. you have to open yourself to other options, because if you just pine away for her, you're going to have a miserable ******** life. there are other girls out there, and if one breaks up with you, you are perfectly capable of finding another one. I know that there's not just one person for everyone, otherwise we'd have an even number of people in the world. But even though I understand all of that, I just can't move on. I really can't, and I really don't want to. I can't explain it and I know it sounds absolutely juvenile and retarded to everyone that I'm making myself miserable, but I really don't want to spend my life with anyone but her. I really don't, I just can't explain it. I understand everything you're telling me, but I'd rather be in pain without her than try to pretend being happy with someone else. I still want to be friends with her, but my devotion is with her. And even if I were to change, I don't see it happening for a good five years or so. But enough about this, you guys are going to get pissed off at me for being so close-minded sooner or later. we're not gonna get pissed. i'm just blunt by nature, but i can't truly be angry at someone i've never even met, so don't worry biggrin . but your problem is that not wanting to. you say you'd rather be miserable without her than pretend to be happy with someone else. well if you believe that's what will happen it is - however if you drop that belief, if you start to believe that you can be happy with someone else, it can and will happen. if you simply start wanting to move on, that'll make it easier. but if you don't want to move on, you probably will never be happy again. and i can definitely understand what you're going through with not wanting to move on. but you have to make a choice - to live your life or not. because if you're going to choose to live in the past, you may as well be dead - you'll have no future. trust me, i was in your shoes a while ago, and the same day that i decided to take those shoes off, my life started improving again. you may not be ready for another girl right now, or for a long while even, which is fine. but you do have to stop living in the past if you want to get through. Well I'm glad to hear you won't be pissed or angry with me. That's a bit reassuring. I do know that my life will suck if I live in the past, but like I said and like you confirmed, if I do move on, it won't happen for a very long time. I can't explain it beyond the fact that if I try to forget about her, I'm just going to be more miserable because I'll be breaking my promise to her. No matter what happens, I don't EVER break my promises. And though I have broken a few, it's like scar tissue, my promise comes back even stronger. Thank you for the advice though. Just because I'm not following it right now doesn't mean that I'm desrgarding it completely, I take everything into account. yeah i understand and dont TRY to forget her. TRYING just makes it worse. just don't focus on her. focus on your own life, don't focus on her, don't worry about her, just let her live her life. it can be hard, but it'll do you good. And I am letting her live her life. She asked me not to talk with her until she says she ready, and it's already been 10 days that I've held true to my promise concerning that. It's just hard that after three years of sharing our lives with eachother, she doesn't want me in hers. It's a really hard and really unecessary seperation, in my opinion because she assumed some things about me and learned the truth about them, but I kind of feel like her fear still has a hold on her thoughts. And it's hard to let her face it on her own because sometimes it feels like she's not worthy of anyone's help. I dunno, it's just hard to try not to focus on her pain when all I've ever wanted to do was help her with her pain. sad But yeah, I am letting her live her life, but I'm just kind of hoping that one day she will miss me and what we've had together. I can live my life, true, but I won't ever lose faith in that. It's not in my nature or my morals.
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Posted: Thu Sep 20, 2007 6:55 pm
didnt mean to imply that you werent letting her live her own life. all i meant was continue letting her live her life, focus on your own, and just try not to let yourself sink into a depression over this.
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Posted: Sun Sep 30, 2007 2:31 pm
I hope that one day she can appreciate what I have given her.
I hope that one day she can realize just how much I really have given her. I've always put her happiness before mine, because when she's not happy I'm not happy...
But even now she says that she's the happiest she's ever been, I'm more sad than I have been in a while, because I don't feel like she appreciates how much I have given her..
But I still love her, and I will still be her friend, even if she never speaks to me again.
When my time on this Earth comes to an end, I hope I can die with a peaceful conscience: that my first true love was grateful for my love..
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Posted: Sun Sep 30, 2007 2:36 pm
And my conviction to always stay faithful to the people I love in this world is what gives me the strength to wake up every day and tell myself that I am worth having life.
My desire to make my loved ones happy is what gives me the strength to keep going, even if they never acknowledge everything I have been, am, and always will be giving them.
I still love her, even if she doesn't love me anymore. My love keeps me going, because if we cannot have love in this world, even when all seems hopeless, then the Earth would only be destined to crumble and fade away into nothing.
You are not worthless, you are not a lost cause, because I am still giving you my love,
ALWAYS.
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