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 Posted: Fri Nov 27, 2009 3:01 pm
I sleep with a stuffed animal. It's a purple elephant with blue dots, I've forgotten his name.
I swear if any of you say something perverse I will wring your neck.
:]
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Posted: Fri Nov 27, 2009 4:11 pm
- N y z z - I sleep with a stuffed animal. It's a purple elephant with blue dots, I've forgotten his name.
I swear if any of you say something perverse I will wring your neck.
:] *whistles nonchalantly*.
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Posted: Fri Nov 27, 2009 5:49 pm
So you sleep in your bed with a purple elephant,everynight O_o
That's not so bad~!!! 8D
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Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 5:23 am
Akiraluckystar - N y z z - I sleep with a stuffed animal. It's a purple elephant with blue dots, I've forgotten his name.
I swear if any of you say something perverse I will wring your neck.
:] *whistles nonchalantly*. xD
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Posted: Wed Jun 23, 2010 1:04 am
********, whatever.
1) I'm a vampire. ******** you. I'm aware that this guild has had fights over the existence of the phenomena. I'm sure I said something in at least one of them, but I'm equally sure I went about it ambiguously. I'm afraid of you ********, because I like you all. I never keep people. If I like them, eventually I feel the need to drive them away somehow. This isn't that. This is me being honest, because I can't do that anywhere else. I tried telling my family once. What happened is that my mother told me I was in a phase and my sister called me telling me that that wasn't something that was 'for me.' So, I'm a ******** sanguinarian vampire. I've never had a donor, though, and so I've learned how to feed off of psychic energy, although I have shitty control over that, and often end up doing it to people without realizing, even though I try to limit it to ambient energy created by large crowds and such.
Do as you will.
2) I despise the idea of sex. I feel that it is the basest expression of my humanity, and a good waste of time. I've spent a considerable amount of my time attempting to rid myself of the motion. Even succeeded once, temporarily.
3) I feel that interpersonal relationships are far too much trouble. Attaching yourself to another person like that is.... stupid, by my reckoning. I've explained how relationships never end well. Either one party dies before the other, or they dissolve their relation. Or they both die simultaneously, which implies something appropriately horrifying going on.
4) I killed a toad at work one day. I was tempted to put it on the ride, just to freak people out. I'm not really guilty, I just thought it was worth mentioning here.
5) I'm a thief. Actually, more accurately, I used to be a thief. This wouldn't bother me, but that I had no good reason for it.
6) I am filled with an incomprehensible hatred of rape and those who perpetrate it.
7) I like my father. I also fear and hate him. The latter two, however, I tend to hide from myself to cope with reality.
cool I hate the guy who said I was his twin earlier in this thread.
9) I am unwilling to confront people. I am afraid of them.
10) I go out of my way to accomodate people. I try to be as kind and polite as possible to people so that they have no reason to be angry with me. This is because I am afraid that if they are angry with me, they will hurt me. This, in turn, is because at one point, that was the case.
11) I feel the call to something. I can't really describe it. I cannot abide certain things. I have a strange psychology that means that instead of becoming a victim, as most would, I instead try to destroy the very things that threatened to destroy me. I walk around at night sometimes, and I watch, and I listen. I seek out the rapists, the muggers, the abusers. The wicked and the evil. I seek them out, and I seek to destroy them. I do not, however, think of myself as some sort of guardian or hero. Those are the ones who think of themselves. I think only of what I cannot abide. I don't do it because it's some sort of fantastic role, like a knight or something, nor do I seek these things out because it's good or right for me to do so. I do it because I can't stand to see humanity walk the path it does. I cannot stand by and watch while people do those things. I.... honestly, want to destroy the people doing those things. I want to keep people from being hurt and scared. I don't want them to end up like that little frightened child inside my head. The little scared child hiding under the covers, listening. Hoping he's good enough today. I cannot let people turn others into that child. I can't. I think about it sometimes, and it makes me cry. I cannot allow that sort of victimization to continue.
s**t. I ******** hate this. I'm on a roll though. Might as well ******** continue, right, guys! Ha! Jesus loves the penitent!
12) My father was abusive. On my brother's 13th birthday, he came home drunk and passed out on the couch. One child put whipped cream on his face. They had been having a contest -- whoever fell asleep first got whipped cream on their face. My father kicked him out. He lived in Kansas, with no way to get back. My mother brought him back in. My father tried to kick him back out. My mother refused. The two went up to their bedroom. He broke her arm there. Apparently, he molested my sister for several years. She in turn did the same to me, just once. I have essentially forgiven that, however it has profoundly affected me. Hence my aforementioned hatred of sex and rape. My father has slammed me against a counter in front of his family (who later denied TO ME that it ever happened). He pinned me to a wall once after I fell through our attic, where he didn't live. I've been beaten with s**t, when I was a kid. He locked me in the basement once when I asked him to tie my shoes, telling me that I wouldn't come back up until I'd figured it out -- to this day, I still 'double-knot' my shoelaces. He is the reason I'm so polite to strangers, and so quiet. Most likely why Raven exists in the first place as well.
Et cetera. I'm a stupid battered child. Look at me complain. Oh, gee, it's so terrible. I think I'll go die now.
Heh.
13) When I feel uncomfortable with honesty, I self-ridicule.
14) I ******** HATE when I've come enough out of my shell to do something like this, and then when I try and post it, Gaia says, "Oh, I'm sorry, were trying to actually post something? Well, we went ahead and logged you out in the meantime." ******** you, you dumbshit database.
If any of you <********> say "OMG i found my twin" I swear to god I will force you to choose the order your family about dies in, and then just to piss you off, I'll let you ******** live with it. I kid you ******** not. Try me. [Insert goddamn expletive here].
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Posted: Wed Jun 23, 2010 1:45 pm
I think Jack is depressed.
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Posted: Wed Jun 23, 2010 3:04 pm
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Posted: Wed Jun 23, 2010 8:50 pm
Jack is... unengaged. My mind doesn't do well with stagnation. I usually end up at least slightly depressed when I'm left to my thoughts for too long. I guess 'depressed' isn't really the right word, but.... I focus on the negative aspects of the past. Close enough, I suppose.
Frankly, I'm still pretty uncomfortable with all that being there, but I guess it's for the better that it is. Maybe something good will come of it.
Either way, I suppose I should thank you guys for..... what you do.
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Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 8:00 am
And what is it that we do that deserves thanks?
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Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 12:56 pm
Speak. Exist. Whatever.
Be nice, I suppose.
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Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 7:01 pm
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Reply
