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I think I'm to be a 40's style secretary for Halloween. I have a sweet hot pink dress that's 40's style and black fishnets.

Yeah. New York is pretty interesting. New York City is gross, though, I think.

I have a 7pg paper to write this weekend that's due on monday, and I have a page and a half written right now. But, heh my friend who usually "baby sits" me to make sure I stay out of trouble is gone from now till Sunday night. Which means I get to hang out with my guy friends all weekend and do whatever I want without coming back to my room and her making sure I haven't done any illegal drugs, because if I do then she won't talk to me anymore. And I like her and I love her, but there is a line where I should still be able to make decisions without her disowning me. Especially since I hang out with the guy she likes, and he smokes every night. *shakes head* Some people are so silly.

And hmm...My boyfriend broke up with me like last Sunday or something. It was a great birthday week last week. I tell you. My boyfriend broke up with me, and then on my birthday I went on a field trip and we spent 8 and a half hours all together on a regular school bus. 4 hours there, and 4 and a half back. It sucked. And we got back like 3 hours later than I thought we were going to. And I had to stand for 4 hours at a museum listening to people talk about stuff that interests me minimally in general, and even less on my birthday. But the evening picked up at like midnight when me and a couple friends went to a party and then I got to make out with a cute boy for the rest of the night. Unfortunately they kicked him off campus on Sunday, because he doesn't go to my school, and he'd been living in one of my friends rooms for a few weeks. It's pretty interesting, being in college. Haha...

wow, my college life has been nothing like that lol. oh, you americans xD you're american right? =P i have a 7pg essay due next monday which i really need to get started on since i'll be partying next week. i've only written the essay proposal lol. and i have recordings to do for my wind symphony exam aaand i have tons of reading to catch up on which i'll probably never catch up on so i'm screwed for my midterms! =D

muffins are good...i think i like cookies better though. if only school was as simple as cookies and muffins...whatever that means...

sometimes guys can act like such girls lol.
so i have a big party at my house tomorrow and a paper due on monday. this is also a first for me in terms of university life stereotypes. i usually just procrastinate bcus i'm lazy, not cus i'm partying =P i also have a cold which isn't good. i hope i'm better by tomorrow.

lol ya i missed my friends soo much it was so great to see them again. busy busy weekend though. my sister and i and her bf were cleaning and decorating and preparing food fri and sat then after sat it was like we'd done nothing lol my sister's friends were all smashed and yet my friends probably spilled more drinks than they did and they were less smashed. i'm just so glad/surprised we didnt ruin any couches or rugs lol. party was fun though. but i hate cleaning although it wasn't too bad. and i got 3 1/2 hrs of sleep that night and had to write a whole 7pg paper yesterday which i finished this morning lol it's probably crap but i guess i stopped caring xP the paper was in the back of my mind the whole party. then when i was trying to write it this guy that i kinda like was always in the back of my mind. ya, i have a guy issue too. i'm gonna make another post lol

The Dilemma:

so i had my party this sat and i'd invited him to it. and well, i guess my dilemma starts with the facebook msging which is how i invited him. so over facebook, i asked him to come to the party and he said yes. then we started talking about who would be coming and i said something about my sister's gino friends and well, long story short, i said something that, because you can't determine tone through online messages sometimes, he asked me if i was hitting on him but he said it in a kind of joking way i think cus once again, can't determine tone. well, i replied no then that night i got a call from lily who talked to david about my "hitting on him" so i'm thinking "why is he telling lily unless he actually did think i was hitting on him" right? so i told him that and he said he only told lily cus he thought it was funny and he said he knew i wasn't hitting on him but sometimes he wishes i would and he added an "lmao" at the end of that. then i joked and was like oh, who's hitting on who now and he was like naw, we just joke around but i might really start hitting on ppl when i get drunk at the party (more detail on that later).

so dilemma part 1: did david really think i was hitting him and care that i was hitting on him? or did he think i was hitting on him and think it was funny? or did he really know i was not hitting him? and was he hitting on me? ("hitting on" is starting to sound funny cus i'm saying it so many times) sure the best thing would be to ask lily or better yet, ask david himself. but i'm what you would call a p***y and have never told a guy i like him because i always need to know if he likes me back lol

ok now, FF|>> to the party (sorry about the novel, i just don't want to tell my best friend yet cus she tends to get all judgmental) so the party: minimal flirting. there were some cute little looks from across the room lol and he'd try to talk to me and i'd want to be w/ him and talk to him too but i had like 15 other friends whom he didn't know, that i had to mingle w/ too. so i felt bad about always leaving him and i hardly got to flirt lol and neither of us made any move. then the party died down and he, my good girl friend steph, and my guy friend kaylan stayed cus they'd planned to sleep over. now, steph is really cool and always has something interesting to say so of course she got along w/ david. and she can be a bit touchy feely sometimes and she'd get a little close to him but nothing really out there and obvious flirting. well, the night wound down further and we were lazing on the couch talking about nothing when i look over to where david's hand was resting on steph's knee and i see him slightly caressing her ******** thigh and i looked away and didnt say a word but i was furious. and whenever i think about that now i want to punch a hole in the wall. then later, the 3 of us ended up sitting on steph's lap, and david was the closest to her and it got quiet cus we were all tired and steph was like "we should kiss to break the tension" quoting the simpsons movie. i was just like "heh..heh.." but it sounded more like "STFU" in my head. And he drove her home the next morning and i want to know what happened when i wasn't there cus i'm pretty pissed off about this!!



I'm done now. Once again, sorry about the novel. I hope you have a good read if you choose to read it lol. I think i just needed to vent. I'll probably talk to my bff about it tomorrow. I just might like to know what y'all think about this =P

Wow...I have no idea what to say to that. I have no idea about boys anymore.

Last Saturday I went to a thanksgiving party at the frat that I frequent. And it's a frat for a college near mine, even though the house is closer to my college, and guys from my college are in it and stuff. My college and this other college share frats, and we can take classes at both of them and stuff...Anyway. So my friend Katie likes this one guy who is in the frat and goes to the other college. And he was going home with her and he told me that his roommate had said I was cute so he brought him over. And we were talking, and he kept trying to talk his roommate into asking me to go home with him. And he wouldn't. Because apparently. He's 20 and he's a junior and he's apparently never kissed a girl. And so he's like afraid of them I guess. But me and my friends were leaving. And Dan was like you going back to school? And his roommate was like yeah, and then I decided to be bold the idiot that I am, and was like Wanna take me back with you? And he said yes. And Dan was like hell yeah! who was going back with my friend Katie. He got really excited that I made the first move, you know the hard part.

So we walked back to his school, and it was a good 20 minutes to half an hour. And we were talking and it was awesome. And he was surprised that I was 18, because apparently Katie and I look and act older. And then we got back, and he was really drunk and he went to the bathroom so I just sat down on the couch in his room. And when he came out he was like my roommate from last year called and he's lost and I need to go find him. So he left and then he and his friends came back a little while later and they like ran into his room, and I don't think he wanted them to. And then they all left and then one of them came back and was like He's passed out in the lounge. So I was just like Okay...And after a little while I went and checked on him and he was laying across a couch and a chair. And he was like They gave me soco. I'm gonna vomit. And I was like You aren't sleeping in here, it looks really uncomfortable. And he wouldn't get up because he had the spins. And after a while one of his friends came out and half carried him back to his room. And was like do you go to state? And I was like yeah, and he was like oh boy, and I was like I'll be okay. So I stayed and rubbed his back. And then at like 4am he got up and apparently passed out in the lounge again. Anyway. I slept in his bed. And he came back a little before noon and said he had to go to a meeting at the house, and asked if I wanted a ride back to state but Dan and Katie were already on their way back because Katie and I were gonna walk back to school together.

And apparently one of the other guys from the frat that lived on his floor called Dan and was like There's a girl in your room and we don't know who she is. And he isn't there. So all night apparently my friends were all worried about me because I didn't answer my phone and Dan kept saying God Damnit. And he thought about calling his roommate and walking him through hitting on me. And I feel really bad and embarrassed even though Katie said that he was the one who should be and that all the guys at the house were making fun of him for it. I can't believe he's 20 and afraid of girls! Why take me home with you if you're going to run away!

Ooo. A wall of text. Lol.
Long story short: 20yr old boy takes me home and I sleep in his bed alone because he passes out in the lounge and is apparently afraid of girls. Why?!