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He didn’t get hugged often, mainly because he didn’t like being hugged. It was more that he saw himself as disgusting, even moreso when he was just recently de-bugged by worms and lice, and he tended not to want to touch anyone out of a contamination risk. However, for once, he wanted this hug. Needed this hug, and welcomed the warm little cluster of togetherness that normal people partook in on a everyday basis.

But in the middle of this, he remembered one more person he had to talk to. “I forgot to talk to Otto.”

He turned, looking out with blurry eyes to Otto and settling to look over at him. “Otto.” He was glad the young man was back, and that he had the courage to come back after the harsh things were said to him. He wasn’t a kid and yet Melvin couldn’t help seeing him as one. He should be in classes and complaining about homework, not here worried if he’d lose a limb or get podded. At least Melvin had a childhood he could reflect on unlike Otto who probably missed out on a few years of just being normal.

He moved over to him. “I’m sorry I yelled at you but you were being mean to Rep and he’s the only few people I have on this island who still talks to me and I just think everyone jumps on him. Harrison and Jordan are good people too and just sleeping around with each other doesn’t make them whores. I asked if you were dating because you seem young and I really don’t know if you are or just freakishly young looking like Gale or oddly short like Gale but I asked not to hurt you but because you said people who are almost a married couple were whores and didn’t think you understood that people could sleep around and still be ok. But if you said you had a girlfriend than good for you, sport. I just …”

He couldn’t help it. Otto was blond and had that sort of attitude that just made him think of one person he knew. Someone close. “I left my siblings at home and it was wrong what Rep said about your Mom because I left my mom and my dad and a whole mess of people and I even left my younger brother, Chris, behind and he sort reminds me of you and you him or however that works and sometimes I wonder if anyone is really looking out for you like they should even more than just a friend but a guide. But you have a lot of friends who came up to help you even if they didn’t go after you, but they are young too so I wonder if they are giving you the best advice because you seem angry all the time I see you, and wonder if you are even getting enough vitamins.”

He took a deep, shuddering breath, and because Harrison had given him a hug – it somehow, in some insane distant pang of crazy, said he should mimic this action. So he took both Otto and Peyton by extension, and brought them to the hug pile group. Rin was also brought in. This would help. Hugs were said to be healing, right? He was a Lifer after all. It was time to heal.

[ hi jenn sorry I will insert some deep and meaningful reaction stuff here later when I am more awake because I want to write it!! ]

But before he had a chance to say any of that, Mimsy was already consoling Robert as they shared their feelings, and even the sight of it made him feel revolted at himself for even pretending to come between them. He looked away. Mimsy - his sister - deserved to be happy.

He didn't.

Lucky didn't really get up from his chair so much as he slid to the floor and practically dragged himself and the weight of his guilt over to the only person who could really absolve him.

"Please," Lucky begged the meditating death lead. He was on his knees, reaching out for Caelius's jacket so that he could pull one or the other of them that much closer. He looked a mess; he was probably crying. Regretfully. Because he had been so wrong, so terrible, so shortsighted. If only he had cared about how Caelis felt before now... "Just kill me."

"I do not deserve to be a hunter," he whispered as he pulled out a knife. Not the sharp and deadly sort used for cutting bagels into tens and hundreds of small but equal-sized pieces, though. Just a plastic butter knife that had been swiped from one of the many plates abandoned in the heat of the moment. It was offered to Caelius in the upturned palms of his hands, like a sword, only much less impressive. This was the death he deserved.

All the while he continued to mumble apologies for the the insubordination and betrayal Caelius had already been well aware of.

Rep wanted no part of the hug group, sliding rapidly into the realm of terror. Guilt, regret and all the other associated emotions made him vulnerable and distressed but if anything they made him even less ready to tolerate physical contact.

He tried to twist free of the dogpile in panic and with no small degree of effort.

The Death lead (he decided the Death word was too much so he was now the D word lead ) was busy meditating away all his sins, and by meditating he just sort of stared at a fixed point across the room and looked extremely serious.

He remained in this expression as Lucky said something about betrayal and the K word again and more insubordination stuff that he was well aware of like a long list of past sins. There was a long pause. "No."

And then he took the plastic butter knife from Lucky very gently and stood up. "You are more than this. You are a soldier trying to find your place in life. So strong, so brave." And then he knighted Lucky. With a plastic butter knife. "Rise up and be reborn. You are now reformed. There will be no K words between us, not any more." As he said this he got a little emotional, or whatever semblance of emotion could occur in his imagination zone and embraced Lucky's head, so that the Life Hunter was getting a lot of unnecessary manchest, and just kept on whispering, "You".

Mark who had somehow acquired another cellphone just sadly moped even as Kat pretty much wrapped him up into a very sad perfect little cocoon of feels and flower print. He feebly, mostly because he was wrapped up too tight stared at Kat. A couple of fingers wriggled out from the fabric fold. "You - you must go on for me. Be a Jedi. The Force is strong with you.... you can use it.... for...... good............" There was a very long and dramatic pause and then Mark just as dramatically closed his eyes and died.

And opened them again to tweet something.

It was harder to pat his shoulder now, but she still tried to. “It… it is your fault.” She was not going to argue with him about that. “And you should be sorry,” she agreed, her tone soft but oh-so-clearly a little confused. She hadn’t thought she’d ever get an apology out of him. She was still mad at him, or she had been, but the whole tone of the room… Sherry sighed and gave Jake another pat on the back.

"I'm sorry I let you be such a jerk," she muttered. That was her fault. She could own it. "You really can be horrible, but it'll be okay." She really didn't know what to say to all of his crying. So she just kept gently patting him on the back.

Rep finally wriggled free, sad to have to relinquish the safety that Harrison represented to do so, he stumbled and moved to just sit on the floor, looking over forlornly at the others. He wasn't even good enough to give people a simple ******** hug without ******** it up. He sniffed audibly and tried to wipe his eyes, tried to compose himself. "We are all selfish." he said to Otto. "It's how we survive. It's how people fend off people like me."


He tried to drag himself away before giving up and just flopping to sprawl on the floor like a repentant slug. Maybe people would just leave him here to die, that would be for the best.

He stared blankly at nothing at all and replied to Rin. "I don't forgive people who don't know how to be sorry."

Somehow they'd all wound up on the floor, cross-legged in a tiny, cramped circle that consisted of one emotionally distraught Death Division Leader, one large (overlarge) Moon hunter, one weeping and sniffling Mist hunter who was currently still patting Gale's hair, and one very confused and very concerned for his life Death midget hunter.

Were they going to start singing Kumbaya now.

Gale managed to not visibly cringe at the word son, but just barely. He hastily rearranged his face to one that was a pathetic attempt at looking totally normal.

"Did you, er..." Stormy had gone to talk to someone, and Gale watched her leave before turning his attention back to Caelius, "er, mean it? You didn't really mean it, right? All the k...k-word stuff, I mean."