Random funny convo's [Post in DOCUMENT style damnit]

[chobits_chii123]

Okay, sadly this conversation is a bit one-sided... It kinda counts as a story. :/
BUT! It's priceless nonetheless.

So Aura and I needed to go to bed, but our friend was refusing to tell her a bedtime story, the meanie face. So, I said I'd give her one. Enjoy! :3

-----

Me
Ohs I KNOW! I can tell you a bedtime story! 8D
Imma be up for...sixteen more mins anyway.

Auradria
YAY!

Me
Hm, let's see...
*opens imaginary book*
Once upon a time,
there was a magical rhinoceros.
His name was Mr. R.
Everyone was jealous of Mr. R because the horn on his head was maaaaagical.

Auradria
oooo

Me
All the other rhino children gazed in awe as Mr. R flaunted his head side to side in his mud bath, showing off the horn that stayed forever white.
They asked their rhino mommies and daddies, "How come our horns aren't that white?"
And the rhino mommies and daddies said...
"Well, little ones, because god made it that way. Our horns are yellowed. And Mr. R's horn is maaaaagical."
The rhino children did not like that way of things. How dare god make their horns yellow while Mr. R's got to be stark white? RACIST!
So a group of them got together and asked the local birds what Mr. R's horn actually did. And they replied,
"Well, we're not all that sure. All we know is that as shiny as it is, Mr. R hasn't had any luck in finding a wife yet. He's different; he probably feels like a freak. But, well, that's god's fault."
The children felt so sorry for Mr. R. Why did they judge him? Why were they jealous? They didn't want to be freaks to, and, they decided, neither did Mr. R.
So the rhino children approached Mr. R one day with all of the best tasting leaves in the land. They wanted to give the loner a warm welcome. And he agreed to sit with them, and share his tales.
One of the children couldn't help but ask, "Mr. R, why is your horn so shiny and maaaagical?"
And Mr. R replied,
"Oh, this old thing?" He knocked the white horn off with one of his forefeet,
revealing a trunk underneath. "You needn't worry about that. I'm a secret spy from the elephant committee. My comrades and I were planning on wiping you all out, but I...couldn't bring myself to go back. I like it here. I feel like I...belong."
A tear dripped down his cheek, and all the children stared at him in awe.
Then they beat him up for making them think he was actually a nice person.
The end.

Auradria
XDDD

Me
I TELL GOOD STORIES 8DDDD  

[Arionis Chambers]

Quote:

Posted by: LordArionis

Quote:

Posted by: Midnight Hawk2

Quote:

Posted by: LordArionis
Stop being so depressing, Hawk. Gosh.

lol. I didn't notice because it was already a hot topic and a line of pages was shown. THIS PLACE IS INSANE!

did anyone hit this thread with a bottle of champagne when it was made?

No, but that shouldn't occur for everything that's made.

For instance, "THat was great, but I'm think I'm pregnant." *SMASH!*

The boyfriend's in jail for murder......

 

[Aileeya]

*Shudder* Yep, DEFINITELY not the 'Christening" that most people think of in conjunction with "the happy news"! eek

....Though come to recall....when I asked my dearest what he thought of as he watched Ash's head emerging at her birth...

He likened me unto a bowling ball return.

mad

rolleyes

And now, to my reason for seeking this forum out: First I must preface by explaining that my brother is in town for a couple of days--specifically to have his M series BMW looked into at a couple of local dealerships. While he was here, he decided to pick me and several of the kids up from school (everyone but Ash) and take us for a little .....drive.

In a BMW.


Sports model.


When it came out, it was billed as 'faster than any corvette ever made'.

We live in WV.

Fortunately, I LIKE roller coasters! rofl

All that to repeat part of a conversation I overheard as Shiro was talking to her Dad on the phone:

"Oh! and Dad? I think I'm over my Audi thing--I want a BMW!"

"....indistinct sounds..."

"It even LOOKS faster!"

"...indistinct sounds..."

"Well, not if I had a radar detector!!" (gleefully)

"...NOOO!!!"  

[xXSabrina_Alexinia_BerkXx]

Ok. so tonight I decided to poke some fun at the fact that some people don't know my second account. So I decided to argue with myself. May be funny may not. Too tired to tell and to each their own. So here it is.

Quote:

Argueing with myself: from Tue May 25, 2010 6:07 PM to Wed May 26, 2010 12:30 AM

Cathy Kuroai: Hey. Is my girlfriend here? *sniffs* I don't smell her sweetness around or the backpack of candy she has. Oh well. *Streaks out of the guild*

Chobits_Chii123: *watches the streaker leave* Sweets? ...Ashie?

Cathy: Of course Ashie! No one else is that smexay. What? You afraid of her now that you know who she's dating?

Chouthenekoarmyveteran: HEY!!!!!!!! Thats my girlfriend you twisted stalker!!!!!!

Cathy: Oh so I'M the stalker!?!?!? She tells me you won't stop calling her and whenever you do try to talk with her all she hears is silence.

Chou: YES YOUR THE STALKER!!!!!!!!! She tells me you keep bitching at her to et on gaia! I'm not surprised she's never on much anymore. She's trying to hide from you!!!!!

Cathy: Me! I've been told you keep sending messages and stuff to her multiple networking sites.

Chou: Then you heard wrong you two cent tramp. I haven't been able to get online for quite some time so I haven't even been able to talk with her online. I barely have time to talk on the phone with her anymore. So go back in the hole you came out of you dirty lying whore.

Cathy: TWO CENT TRAMP! DIRTY WHORE! You've gotta lot of nerve you insensitive b*****d! If I wasn't afraid of getting banned I'd hack your a** so fast you wouldn't know what hit you!

Chou: Oh yeah!?!?!?! I don't think you have the guts OR the ability to!

Cathy: Oh yeah!!!!?!?!?!?!?! And why do you think that!?!?!?!?!?

Chou: Because your me.

Cathy: Oh.......Right........

 

[Auradria Riddle]

Okay its been a while since I've posted anything here; manly cause nothing fun has happened, I posted a comment on my face book page and this is what came of it:

Auradria Power XD Seen the Xbox 360 at Sams only 193 or so dollars, sooo tempted to buy it and a Halo game (37 or so dollars) Sadly I couldn't had to worry about dog and cat food. . . Ah well maybe next time. I am now going to fix me an Italian style wrap.

Arionis Chambers
Buy a 360. Do it. Get ODST. And Soul Calibur 4.

Auradria Power
XDD ODST was the one I was looking at ^_^ And I didn't have the full 193 dollars I was $30 dollars off T^T

Arionis Chambers
Excuses, excuses. Sell your old PS2 and games, get money, go back, buy 360.

Chii
Microsoft sucks! /shot

Auradria Power
But I like some of my PS2 games Ari-chan.

@Chii: Just because you can't use any microsoft product doesn't mean it sucks.

April Husband
...That was low. XD

Arionis Chambers
Then keep some. But get a 360.

Sell Chii into slavery if you need to.

Auradria Power
@Chii: -shrugs- it was only how high I could reach ^_^

@Ari: Thinks you may have a point there, Chii could raise me a lot of moola, what with everyone wanting her ^_^ (love ya Chii-chan)

Chii
o_____________o;;;;
What, is it pick on Chii day today!?
T^T

Auradria Power
You know only Ari would bring something like that up, I thought it'd be fun to go farther you know I luffs ya.

Chii
Lol. You can't sell me. You love me too much. ♥
...Ari on the other hand... :/

Auradria Power
-giggles- Just wait if we can get him to come to youmacon well have to auction him off you know how many people LOVE Ikuto. And would LOVE to spend a day with him. (Feels save saying all that cause he's not on anymore.)

Chii
Lol, selling the Ari to random fangirls, yeah, that sounds good. XD

Auradria Power
-laughs- we would have to get that on video so we could show the guild members.

Chii
Girl what AREN'T we gonna get on video? ♥

Auradria Power
Oo um. . . anything to do with Kila you know how she is with being on camera.

Chii
Do you really think that's gonna stop me? :3

Auradria Power
XD Nope, and kinda hard when theres so many of us, oh yeah I forgot who are you cosplaying as again?
Chii
Hazuki, silly! ^_^ I got my cosplay almost completely done except for the skirt. I'll work on yours in the meantime~

Arionis Chambers
If I make any profit, I'm keeping it.

Auradria Power
I thought so, I have a friend thats ganna be there he takes picks of cosplay and lolita outfits at the different cons.

Chii
Ari, you know I can get Aura to maul you. ♥
Ooo who is it Aura?

Auradria Power
Wait what I hurd my name!
his name is Lawrence ^_^ He says your ganna get captured as long as your in one of thous pretty dresses.

@Ari: Oo but were selling you the money comes to our hands first.

Chii
*flails* But, but!! Chii won't be in lolita, not exactly! Besides, Aura's the REAL loli!~

Auradria Power
I AM NOT LOLI!!!

Chii
Girl, if *---- and *---- can call ME loli, you're super-loli.
*= names have been cut out due to privacy issues

Auradria Power
Oh come on, help me out Ari you know me, I am no where near loli style am I?

Auradria Power
T^T Oh come on anyone on my side?

And still I has no one say that they were on my side.  

[AshoftheMidnightRose]

That's great. whee I'd love to hang out with you guys dressed loli. We would reign terror upon the civilized world. Anyway. In Upward Bound you have a dorm partner who you share a room with and because we're using the new building(which are suit style) we have two other people who share a bathroom with us. It's four rooms connected by a bathroom and both sides of both bathroom doors can be locked for privacy. Well, a lot of shenanigans have been taking place because well.. it's three of my perverted friends and I stuck in a suit for six weeks together.. So! This is a peek at some of what goes on behind those many many closed doors:

Dorm buddies:
MeganxKiara and CassiexMe

Me: *bursts into the room singing off key Beatles songs* WHAT WOULD YOU DOOOOO IF I SANG OUT OF TEEEWWNN WOULD YOU-..........*sees Cassie curled up against the wall on her bed with a pillow covering her face*
Cassie: *looks up to me with red eyes and sniffles*
Me: .......................*slams and locks the door and marches across the room to the connecting bathroom* *slides the huge bolt along the track into the latch on the wall*
Cassie: *stared confused while wiping her face*
Me: *marches back across the room and climbs on the bed snuggling as close as possible to her before putting an arm around her shoulder*...........Now tell mommy Karen what's wrong.
Cassie: *chuckles* Does personal space mean anything to you?
Me: Nope. *completely serious face*
Cassie: Nice. I just hate my parents that's all. The usual.

*a sudden loud knock on the bathroom door catches our attention*

Me: Don't come in! We're indecent!

*knocking continues anyway*

Me: I don't think you grasp the situation! We're indecent TOGETHER!!

*knocking continues*

Cassie: *throws a shoe at the door while laughing* Cut it out!
Me: I'm coming! I'm coming! *slides off the bed and limps to the door yanking open the lock*

*little blond Megan(who has an impeccable straight face sense of humor) stands at the door*

Me: What?
Megan: I need to shave my legs...... and my pits. Where's your shaving creme?
Me: ....Wha???
Megan: I said I need to rip off a layer of skin trying to rid myself of hair, just hand over the can lady.
Cassie and Me: *glance at each other before bursting into laughter*
Megan: *laughs* Okay maybe not quite so violently but seriously. Give me the shaving creme. I know you're holding out on me. xD

And on another occasion I made the horrid mistake of introducing Cassie to thats what she said jokes:

*it's two in the morning and we're laying in complete darkness a little awkwardly*

Me: ..............
Cassie: ...........
Me: So.... You bored?
Cassie: Yup. Got anything to do?
Me: Well, we could play on my laptop, but one of the counselors might walk in and catch us.
Cassie: Thats!!
Me: Wait!
Cassie: What!!
Me: If you say it I swear to gosh-
Cassie: Sheeee!!
Me: -I'll rip out your vocal chords!!
Cassie: .......................said!
Me: Dammit Cassie!! Cut it out!!
Cassie: Sorry..
Me: It's not even that funny! Why do you like saying that so much?!
Cassie: Because you can make ANYthing sound perverted!!
Me: No you can't! It's just annoying! That's the 48th time tonight!
Cassie: That's what she said!!
Me: AAAAGH!!!
Cassie: *laughs so hard she falls out of bed while I beat her with a pillow*  

[AshoftheMidnightRose]

*in the dorms again*

Me: *opens the connecting door to the other room where Kiara and Megan are hanging out* Ehem. I need to pee.
Megan and Kiara: O_o''.....
Me: That is all. *closes door*

*Kiara and Megan start cracking up*

Me: *opens door when done with a totally straight face* I have finished, peeing.
Kiara and Megan: rofl
Me: That is all. *closes door as they both start throwing things at it*  

[kilala2156]

My brother and Chibi-chibi were playing SSBB, my brother is Link, Chibi-chibi is Marth. (My character already died)
Brother: -insert stupid kung-fu sound here- Prepare yourself.
Me: -mocking tone- Loser.
Brother: Quiet! -In dramatic tone- Now Chibi-chibi are you ready to cross blades?
I try (and fail) to keep my composure, and then begin to laugh, Chibi-chibi then begins to laugh also.
Brother: ... oh you pervert.

More SSBB, my brother chooses random and gets Peach.
Me: Hey look, I always say you’re a girl and a fruit, now we know what kind.
Everyone who is there laughs.
Brother: Oh that’s it; we'll see who's laughing when you get defeated by the fruit.
Me: ... does this mean you're out?

Chibi-chibi and I are talking about yaoi to my brother.
Me: So you think he's a seme or an uke?
Chibi-chibi laughs: Not sure, Ian doesn't seem like and uke, but then there's Wiz and Jacob and Matt to think about.
Me: True, maybe he's in between.
Brother: What, that’s gross.
Me: Not that kind of in between, geez.
Brother: This doesn't matter to me, I don't even know what a seme or uke is.
Me: What how can you not? We talk about this so often.
Chibi-chibi: Yeah seriously, that’s just sad.
Me: Oh I know, an example through baseball, would you rather be the baseball or the baseball glove.
Brother: No way!  

[Auradria Riddle]

I rarely get to talk to my brother and mom and when My brother and I talk it is a constant . . . argue/insult contest this is one of them.:
Me=. . .me. . .
Mom= mom
Bro= my brother

Me: I never know whos on when. . .Lil' bro needs to get his own YIM.
Mom: is it hot up there
me: meh, its bearable.
bareable*
how bout there?
mom: it`s 91 down hear
me: O_O
Bro: and big sis can kiss my
***
me: O_O I'd rather kick it for the bad word thanks.
bro: xp
me: Oh and bro, you need to stop stealing the computer when the adults are having intelligent conversations.
bro: the weather is not an intelligent convo
me: -shakes head- oh you poor child. That is how all intelligent conversations start,
bro: quit dermin and come back to reatly
me: -snickers-and someone should use spell check little bro.
mom: all right you to play nice
me: I was mommy dearest
mom: good one
me: I know right
bro: i c ganeing up on me
me: well duh you are the only boy -oh wait your not silly me gone and forgot you don't count as a boy.

The fighting stopped then between my brother and I.  

[Aileeya]

Ok, so "Well Child Check Up" time has rolled around again, and I was sitting in the pediatrician's office with Katie102 and Ashie....who is HORRIBLY afraid of needles...of course, being a MOM, I had already encouraged Ash to be "brave" and a "good role model" for her baby sister--whom I had already encouraged to be "brave" and a "good example" for her big sister, who we all know is SO afraid of needles. 3nodding

So, there we were in the office...and we'd just been discussing whether or not the nurse was going to suggest that Ash 'pee in a cup' or not...and of course, then had to explain to Katie102 WHY girls so frequently get asked to 'pee in a cup' and how they can test for multiple conditions, everything from pregnancy, to diabetes, to anemia--all the while, she seeming to understand perfectly well, until in her most offended little seven year old voice says, "But why do they make you pee in a cup when they HAVE a toilet??" rofl

BTW...they did NOT have Ash pee in a cup--but they did ask Katie102 to....for the very first time (turns out she's like her eldest sister Shiro, and should take a multivitamin with some iron to avoid borderline anemia) It was HORRIBLY difficult for her, since she really appreciates her privacy...and I not only had to be in the bathroom with her, but had to actually hold the cup! (Poor baby was BARELY able to go at all)

OMG--as I sit here typing this, I've just received a "bum call" from my hubby as he's finished dropping Ash off for her trip (we're without half our kids this whole week...hackingsucks101 is off for Scout Camp, and Ash is in Washington DC....ANYway, I'm hearing "NOW you say you're hungry--you already ate my fries"...followed by the sounds of I think ordering...as well as static, and what ever else is in his pocket coming up against the phone...and Katie102's voice waaay in the background using her "yeah I know what I said then but NOW I really really really just want---(insert what ever here)" tone. lol I love these sounds...*sigh*  

[kilala2156]

Something from the school year.

Dwarf-Chan and I are sitting at lunch while she talks about something I am apparently being too quiet to her.
Dwarf-Chan: Hey, what's wrong? You're just sitting there staring at your food, you're not even getting upset about me swearing.
My mind comes back into reality: You know what sucks?
Dwarf-Chan: ... hookers?
I glare at her and kick her: NO.
Dwarf-Chan: Ha, I got a reaction... now what is it that sucks?
Me: Disney movie. Why the frick do they have to be so depressing.
Dwarf-Chan: Why did this get into your head? You were fine this morning.
Me: Ms. Hurn played The Lion King in class.
Dwarf-Chan: ... Ms. Hurn teaches history.
Me: So?
Dwarf-Chan: What does The Lion King have to do with history?!
Me: I don't know, some crap about it being a political allegory or some other big word.
Dwarf-Chan: Why are you upset, you didn’t have to do any work? Be happy.
Me: I can’t it was too depressing, at the part where Mufasa die I actually started getting teary eyed.
Dwarf-Chan laughed: Oh, I knew you had emotion other then anger and poor sarcasm.
I glare at her more: It wouldn’t have been so bad if the girls next to me hadn’t noticed and asked if I was okay.
Dwarf-Chan stopped laughing: Let me guess, she brought a bunch of unnecessary attention to it?
Me, in very angry tone: Ms. Hurn actually came over and asked I wanted to go into the friggen hall for a few minutes, Ms. Hurn the woman who wouldn’t let a kid into the hall to take care of friggen nose bleed.
Dwarf-Chan: To be fair the whole class probably noticed by then, they’d feel bad for the person with the nose bleed but they’d probably laugh at you for cry.
Me, still angry: Which they shouldn’t! The Lion King is a friggen sad movie; if you don’t at least start to sniffle when Mufasa dies then clearly you simply have no soul; that is the only logical explanation for it!
Dwarf-Chan: Okay, someone needs to be a little less passionate about Disney films.
Me calmly: I’m not passionate about them, (less calmly) they just anger me beyond all logical reason, (anger) because they’re so friggen sappy and sad!
Dwarf-Chan: Ya know what, no more Disney films for you, especially in school.